Yo.. I just got caught

[$LakerGold]

You know what I mean, BITCH DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO KNOCK!!! USED A ****IN COIN TO UNLOCK MY DOOR!! F*** MY LIFE!!!!!!! :roll: :roll: :roll:

:roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: FML...



WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF!!!!!!! :roll:

[L.Kizzle]

So what, you got caught watching Designing Woman, it's was a good show. Love me some Delta Burke.

[DirkNowitzki41]

sorry bro :roll:

[$LakerGold]

I had a nice run... :(



OMFGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!! :roll: :roll: :roll:

[Myth]

You know what I mean, BITCH DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO KNOCK!!! USED A ****IN COIN TO UNLOCK MY DOOR!! F*** MY LIFE!!!!!!! :roll: :roll: :roll:

:roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: FML...



WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF!!!!!!! :roll:

Did your mom watch you finish?

[Faptastrophe]

You gotta just burst out of your room now and loudly announce: I FEEL GRAND!!!

[ZeN]

I dont see the problem

[L.Kizzle]

First off, who masbertates on a Wednesday night? That is like a very weird say for some self lovin.

Usually on a Sunday night heading into the work week or like Tuesday right after work. Even a Friday after yoo went to the club but came back empty handed, you pitty sex yourself but Wednesday ... the fck. :biggums:

[$LakerGold]

She closed the door and locked it again...
She has been buggin me to replace my fkin curtains for the past few days..... omg..... :banghead: :banghead: :banghead: :banghead:

I wish I can find somethin similar to that chick's ass... so she'll think it wasn't porn... but nah, I think i'm fked :roll: FMLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :roll:

[IcanzIIravor]

You know what I mean, BITCH DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO KNOCK!!! USED A ****IN COIN TO UNLOCK MY DOOR!! F*** MY LIFE!!!!!!! :roll: :roll: :roll:

:roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: FML...



WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF!!!!!!! :roll:

Nothing wrong with wearing women's underwear while staring in the mirror whispering 'Yes, I am a pretty lil girl.' If she has a problem with that then doom on her.

[$LakerGold]

First off, who masbertates on a Wednesday night? That is like a very weird say for some self lovin.

Usually on a Sunday night heading into the work week or like Tuesday right after work. Even a Friday after yoo went to the club but came back empty handed, you pitty sex yourself but Wednesday ... the fck. :biggums:
Oh please... Sometimes, you just gotta let it go :oldlol: FMLLLL!!!!


OMG... seriously.. :facepalm :oldlol:

[L.Kizzle]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E1FTzzorVBk

[Legends66NBA7]

You going to get the talk ?

:lol

[CelticBaller]

:lol

[$LakerGold]

lol wtf no... but this shit is gonna be weird for the next couple of days lol

[PickernRoller]

http://i46.tinypic.com/m2143.jpg

[Legends66NBA7]

lol wtf no... but this shit is gonna be weird for the next couple of days lol

Just playing. :cheers:

Yeah, I can imagine :lol

[L.Kizzle]

How old are you?
Were you completely naked or did you have socks on? :lol
What kind of socks were they?

[$LakerGold]

Just playing. :cheers:

Yeah, I can imagine :lol

Man, I thought I was slick...:facepalm

[$LakerGold]

How old are you?
Were you completely naked or did you have socks on? :lol
What kind of socks were they?

Teenager.
I had white socks and sweat pants on cuz it was cold.. :oldlol:


FMLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!:roll:

[Freedom Kid7]

:dancin I know it seems bad, but there are two things here. First off, there's nothing you can do to altar what she saw. Second, it'll be okay though. A lot of people jerk it. A lot. Sure there may be a bit of:coleman: for a while but it's not as bad as you think. If she's cool, she'll get over it

[knickballer]

Natural brah.

Jizz in her face to teach her a lesson to knock next time :oldlol:

[MetsPackers]

:roll: :roll: just imagine when she tells your dad. hes gona be like :facepalm

[L.Kizzle]

If you were grown it wouldn't even matter.

She'll just walk in a say "let me hold $20 and I didn't know you were left handed" and walk right out.

[Freedom Kid7]

If you were grown it wouldn't even matter.

She'll just walk in a say "let me hold $20 and I didn't know you were left handed" and walk right out.
http://i.imgur.com/ZnqQ5.gif:roll:

[AlonzoGOAT]

That's dangerous op what if you accidently finish right in her face when you open the door

[AlonzoGOAT]

Were you using a condom op?


lol

[L.Kizzle]

That's dangerous op what if you accidently finish right in her face when you open the door
Moms kid just got her kids kids on her face.

[AlonzoGOAT]

Moms kid just got her kids kids on her face.

I would kill to see the op's face but what was yours reaction op:roll: :roll: that and why the fuvk would she open your door with a coin what a douche...

[L.Kizzle]

I would kill to see the op's face but what was yours reaction op:roll: :roll: that and why the fuvk would she open your door with a coin what a douche...
You can hear her rattling a freaking coin in the door. That's plenty enough time to out you dick away and pretend like your sleeping.

[KG215]

You can hear her rattling a freaking coin in the door. That's plenty enough time to out you dick away and pretend like your sleeping.

He musta really been in a zone.

[L.Kizzle]

He musta really been in a zone.
That zone you get when you start talking to yourself. :lol

I was there a few time, but I used to do my masbertating when everyone was either gone or late at night when everyone was a sleep.

Ste yo jerk game up lil homie.

[Kobe 4 The Win]

You gotta tell these hoes that you jerk off to porn and you are going to continue jerk your shit. Don't be bullshiting them, tell them what's up. Jerking to porn is fap-tastic. Would she prefer you go out and do dirt with real bitches? You just gotta realease that evil a couple times a day or something's gonna happen. She needs to understand that shit. Don't be embarrassed. Act like she's the asshole for not letting you handle your biz.

[Myth]

First off, who masbertates on a Wednesday night? That is like a very weird say for some self lovin.

Usually on a Sunday night heading into the work week or like Tuesday right after work. Even a Friday after yoo went to the club but came back empty handed, you pitty sex yourself but Wednesday ... the fck. :biggums:

You have days of the week that you ban *********ion? :biggums:

[Myth]

You can hear her rattling a freaking coin in the door. That's plenty enough time to out you dick away and pretend like your sleeping.

Or at least yell "Don't come in, I'm jerking it."

[L.Kizzle]

You have days of the week that you ban *********ion? :biggums:
Homie, you just can't be playin with your dick every night, shit ain't healthy.

Wednesday is a no-no. It gotta be a reason, like I accidentally pressed play on the porn in the DVD player and now I have to please Mr. Big Stuff because he likes what he sees on the big screen.

Only a Friday (or Saturday) after rejection at a club. And you have too because was dick was expecting something to happen anyway.

Sunday's was almost banned as it being a day for worship. But with work the next day, sometimes you gotta do something to prepare yourself for the week you're heading into.

Tuesday, but only if you don't go to the happy hour 2$ Tuesday Night at local bars.

[Myth]

Homie, you just can't be playin with your dick every night, shit ain't healthy.

Wednesday is a no-no. It gotta be a reason, like I accidentally pressed play on the porn in the DVD player and now I have to please Mr. Big Stuff because he likes what he sees on the big screen.

.

Nah, if anything, it is better to go into Friday and Saturday nights empty. That way you don't blow your load too quickly with a girl.

Also, who the f*ck still watches porn on DVD? We use the internets these days.

[KG215]

That zone you get when you start talking to yourself. :lol


Yeah, that, or that point where there's no way in hell you're stopping, even if your mom, grandma, and Jesus himself walked into the room. There's probably a lot of overlap between the two for a lot of people, but I'm not a "talk to myself" guy.

[L.Kizzle]

Nah, if anything, it is better to go into Friday and Saturday nights empty. That way you don't blow your load too quickly with a girl.

Also, who the f*ck still watches porn on DVD? We use the internets these days.
I convert my shit to DVD (and have a few like Kelly Divine is Buttwoman which I made a thread about.) Porn on the big screen looks awesome.

[Myth]

I convert my shit to DVD (and have a few like Kelly Divine is Buttwoman which I made a thread about.) Porn on the big screen looks awesome.

I agree, but I find that an HDMI connection from computer to TV does the trick.

[L.Kizzle]

I agree, but I find that an HDMI connection from computer to TV does the trick.
DO they make porn in 3D? Shit has to be weird when the come shot comes. You're probably in your bed butt naked whipping yourself off talking bout "did it get on me?"

[AK47DR91]

ive been caught twice. im used to it.

[d.bball.guy]

:roll: :roll:

[jbot]

i'm sorta lost. did u get caught by ur g/f or ur mom?

i bout got caught one time by my pops when i was a kid. i was fappin away and all of a sudden, he busts thru the door and starts talking to me. luckily, i had my bottom half under a blanket and the whole time he's talking to me, i'm secretly nutting all over myself. i felt like a wicked little pervert.

[KevinNYC]

DO they make porn in 3D? Shit has to be weird when the come shot comes. You're probably in your bed butt naked whipping yourself off talking bout "did it get on me?"

I went to see a revival of this for my friend's bachelor party. In the theater with the glasses and a bunch of giggling hipsters. I gotta say, I love the director's name.

http://kinotechnologies.files.wordpress.com/2011/05/full_hotskinin3d-1sh-17944.jpg

[Myth]

DO they make porn in 3D? Shit has to be weird when the come shot comes. You're probably in your bed butt naked whipping yourself off talking bout "did it get on me?"

Don't know, I've never seen porn in 3d. Even then, I'm not used to porn from the girl's point of view, lol.

[Myth]

i'm sorta lost. did u get caught by ur g/f or ur mom?


His mom.

[L.Kizzle]

I went to see a revival of this for my friend's bachelor party. In the theater with the glasses and a bunch of giggling hipsters.

http://kinotechnologies.files.wordpress.com/2011/05/full_hotskinin3d-1sh-17944.jpg
Damn, not sure if I'm ready for John Holmes dick in 3D.

[jbot]

His mom.
man, that's horrible. i hope i never catch any of my sons tossing off.

[Myth]

man, that's horrible. i hope i never catch any of my sons tossing off.

I believe she walked in as he was finishing. Clear view and all.

[KevinNYC]

He was actually only in one scene and looked like he coming down from a coke binge. If I remember correctly, it was on orgy scene and the women were practically holding him up.

Also, yes, there was one 3D effect where the whole audience went :EWWWWW:

[jbot]

I believe she walked in as he was finishing. Clear view and all.
damn, she saw his shlong and all. i wouldn't come (no pun intended) outta my room for a month.

[L.Kizzle]

damn, she saw his shlong and all. i wouldn't come (no pun intended) outta my room for a month.
Damn, everytime mom make hot dogs she just screams.

Dude, your mom can't even make you a freaking hot dog anymore ...

[jbot]

Damn, everytime mom make hot dogs she just screams.

Dude, your mom can't even make you a freaking hot dog anymore ...
nope. no more hot dogs, sausage, cucumbers for ur salads.

hell, she probably can't even stand the sight of Ranch right now either for that matter!

and forget miracle whip!

[bluechox2]

ive been caught twice. im used to it.
:lol

[Punpun]

Yo bro it's alright if you only were fapping to vanilla porn.

[dunksby]

Are we gonna act like his girl did not unlock his door with a coin?

[Punpun]

Are we gonna act like his girl did not unlock his door with a coin?
His mom freaking did. ****ing psycho.

:yaohappy:

[dunksby]

His mom freaking did. ****ing psycho.

:yaohappy:
:biggums: Well that's really bad, I guess I didn't get the seriousness of the issue :lol
OP how old are you?

[LA_Showtime]

Look her in the eyes, aim the load in her general direction, and finish like a boss.

[Legend of Josh]

Is you serious? Too many tools, fools, and grown ass men chillaxin' in kiddy pools (speaking of the OP, of course)

Sure, we've all created senseless, dumbfounding threads from time to time, but this shit right here. this shit you just posted, followed by half a dozen rolling laughing faces, screams full-blown retard. Congrat-u-fu*king-lations, you're officially an acute dumbass.

:applause:

[d.bball.guy]

Should've done this, OP

http://i.imgur.com/wx4k0.gif

[$LakerGold]

I'm done with this thread yo :oldlol:

Anyways, there's a huge dresser to the left that blocks your vision of half of my bed when you open the door. so she didn't see my D*** and everything.. but she definitely saw my TV :roll:

And No, it's not my girl... she lives in NY lol

I'm a teenager lol

And wanna know somethin? ...I "DID IT", AND BITCH WALKED IN 3 SECONDS AFTER... YOU DO NOT KNOW HOW IT FEELS WHEN YOU GOT YOUR DICK INSIDE YOUR PANTS AFTER JIZZING. :facepalm

[$LakerGold]

Yeah.. .it pissing me off knowing that the fact that, she used a FKIN COIN to open my door...

[Legend of Josh]

Should've done this, OP

http://i.imgur.com/wx4k0.gif

:no:

OP will jerk off to that clip. He's a sicko. If he were sent off to a distant galaxy, he'd find someway to monkey spank himself, then his pee pee shrivels up and becomes limp for a couple minutes ... then he rejuvenates, reload, and then "unload" again and again. (again and again *Rakim* voice on Canibus album 2000 BC, track 6 I believe? ...)

OP is a sick fu*k.

[Rnbizzle]

:no:

OP will jerk off to that clip. He's a sicko. If he were sent off to a distant galaxy, he'd find someway to monkey spank himself, then his pee pee shrivels up and becomes limp for a couple minutes ... then he rejuvenates, reload, and then "unload" again and again. (again and again *Rakim* voice on Canibus album 2000 BC, track 6 I believe? ...)

OP is a sick fu*k.
I seriously wonder what kind of a dude you are in real life. I mean to hold up this ridiculous act you have to be at least a bit retarded in real life.

[$LakerGold]

I seriously wonder what kind of a dude you are in real life. I mean to hold up this ridiculous act you have to be at least a bit retarded in real life.
Ignore him lol

[Legend of Josh]

I seriously wonder what kind of a dude you are in real life. I mean to hold up this ridiculous act you have to be at least a bit retarded in real life.

... just a little. Hey, we're all 'tard'd in one way or another. LOL, like I just mentioned in another thread, you guys take this place way too seriously. But hey, here's the dancing banana.

:banana:

See him, or it, dancing? Look into his (its) eyes, and see that red part underneath? That's lipstick. So pucker up and fu*ker butt.

[d.bball.guy]

Yeah.. .it pissing me off knowing that the fact that, she used a FKIN COIN to open my door...
I can't imagine how you use a coin to open a door :lol

[ballup]

Can I meet this girl? She's gotta teach me how to pick locks with a coin.

[$LakerGold]

nahh, it's easy... just gotta twist/rotate the lock with a coin.

[Unstoppabull]

Slap, Lick, Foundle

[L8k3r5]

:oldlol: My mom caught me watching porn the other day. I wasn't jerking it though. Surprisingly she wasn't shocked or anything. She told me all men do it so its cool with her. Still awkward as f*ck though...:banghead: