Offensive skillset Matchup round 1: Dwight Howard vs. Telephone Pole.

[Mr. Jabbar]

http://imageshack.us/a/img688/5664/dwighthowardq.jpg


VS


http://imageshack.us/a/img201/3711/telephonepole310x224.jpg



Who you got?

[konex]

I'll have to think about this...

[Wavves]

Dwight, telephone poles can't play basketball.

[andgar923]

Dwight, telephone poles can't play basketball.

yet are still just as skilled.

[Mr. Jabbar]

It's a toss up on almost every category but I'll give the edge to Telephone Pole for the chance of electrocuting a defender leaving someone open

[Lakers_Kobe_Fan]

http://imageshack.us/a/img688/5664/dwighthowardq.jpg


VS


http://imageshack.us/a/img201/3711/telephonepole310x224.jpg



Who you got?


Easy telphone pole... Howard would still get off like 5/20 with 3 being dunks and 2 goaltnding lucky calls

[Inactive]

Once telephone pole gets in position no one can push him off his spot. He sets the hardest screens, and has unmatched length. He's not very mobile, and he's a bit lacking in offensive skills, but with the right PG he could probably be an offensive contributor.

[Mr. Jabbar]

Once telephone pole gets in position no one can push him off his spot. He sets the hardest screens, and has unmatched length. He's not very mobile, and he's a bit lacking in offensive skills, but with the right PG he could probably be an offensive contributor.

exactly. people underrate telephone pole cause all his 3 second violations but hes still a much more versatile offensive weapon than howard. he'd also open up needed cap space to improve the bench.

[macmac]

Communication is much better with telephone poll. And he can electrify the arena. However he is a bit of a pylon on defence. Still, he performs great when it gets down to the wire.

Howard, on the other hand, is a useless fkin ungrateful idiot.

[I.R.Beast]

exactly. people underrate telephone pole cause all his 3 second violations but hes still a much more versatile offensive weapon than howard. he'd also open up needed cap space to improve the bench.
or u can just chop him down and make a bench.

[maybeshewill13]

Telephone pole has the worst attitude in the NBA. Nikka just stands there, plays 48 minutes a night and never passes the ball. Still plays better defense than Dwight though. His boxing out skills are incredible.

[macmac]

Telephone pole has the worst attitude in the NBA. Nikka just stands there, plays 48 minutes a night and never passes the ball. Still plays better defense than Dwight though. His boxing out skills are incredible.

Telephone pole's level of wit also supplants yours

[red1]

a better comparison is


http://www.rantsports.com/nba/wp-content/slideshow/2012/12/top-5-nba-teams-dwight-howard-will-land-on-in-2013/medium/SL1-Intro-Howard.jpg
http://www.scientificamerican.com/media/inline/that-burger-youre-eating-is-mostly-corn_1.jpg








same colour and shit too

[macmac]

a better comparison is


http://www.rantsports.com/nba/wp-content/slideshow/2012/12/top-5-nba-teams-dwight-howard-will-land-on-in-2013/medium/SL1-Intro-Howard.jpg
http://www.scientificamerican.com/media/inline/that-burger-youre-eating-is-mostly-corn_1.jpg


same colour and shit too

Howard is a bit cornier. They're both usually salty once the temperature rises, but Dwight has way more butter on his fingers. Plus they're both useless during the season and sell out once the season is over.

[maybeshewill13]

Telephone pole's level of wit also supplants yours
Why so salty nikka? You one of my stalkers who is always messaging me and telling me I'm a fakkit? :sleeping

[macmac]

Why so salty nikka? You one of my stalkers who is always messaging me and telling me I'm a fakkit? :sleeping

Lol I don't know who you are but if there's a lot of people tellin you you're a homosexual perhaps you should take the dikk out of your mouth and have a talk with yourself about it

[tomtucker]

Communication is much better with telephone poll. And he can electrify the arena. However he is a bit of a pylon on defence. Still, he performs great when it gets down to the wire.

Howard, on the other hand, is a useless fkin ungrateful idiot.
:oldlol:

[arifgokcen]

Communication is much better with telephone poll. And he can electrify the arena. However he is a bit of a pylon on defence. Still, he performs great when it gets down to the wire.

Howard, on the other hand, is a useless fkin ungrateful idiot.
:roll: :roll: :roll:

[madmax]

LOL at Fakers fans hating on the best center in the game:facepalm
Seems like only prime Shaq is good enough for this spoiled brat ass fanbase... Pretentious twits

[STATUTORY]

Howard is a bit cornier. They're both usually salty once the temperature rises, but Dwight has way more butter on his fingers. Plus they're both useless during the season and sell out once the season is over.

:roll: :roll: :roll:

[bluechox2]

LOL at Fakers fans hating on the best center in the game:facepalm
Seems like only prime Shaq is good enough for this spoiled brat ass fanbase... Pretentious twits
shaq had a bigger ego than kobe and kobe had to be kept in line as 2nd fiddle which shaq certainly did while the offense was ran through shaq

dwight's personality allows kobe to make him his bitch

[Chapallaz]

Take a killer whale from the sea, match him up with a bobcat on dry land and then claim the bobcat is absolutely the superior predator.

[CeltsGarlic]

Communication is much better with telephone poll. And he can electrify the arena. However he is a bit of a pylon on defence. Still, he performs great when it gets down to the wire.

Howard, on the other hand, is a useless fkin ungrateful idiot.

So many puns :O

[STATUTORY]

Take a killer whale from the sea, match him up with a bobcat on dry land and then claim the bobcat is absolutely the superior predator.

but what does that have to do with Dwight not being able to catch an entry pass in the post?

[Chapallaz]

but what does that have to do with Dwight not being able to catch an entry pass in the post?
Did Dwight struggle this bad in Orlando? Nope, the system suited him better.

[Mr. Jabbar]

Communication is much better with telephone poll. And he can electrify the arena. However he is a bit of a pylon on defence. Still, he performs great when it gets down to the wire.

Howard, on the other hand, is a useless fkin ungrateful idiot.

:oldlol:

[Mr. Jabbar]

So in summary:

Post moves: Toss up.
Shooting: Toss up.
Passing: Toss up.
Handles: Toss up.
Dunking alone: Slight edge to howard.
Communication: telephone pole.
Production down the wire: telephone pole.
Box out: telephone pole.

matchup winner: telephone pole.

[STATUTORY]

So in summary:

Post moves: Toss up.
Shooting: Toss up.
Passing: Toss up.
Handles: Toss up.
Dunking alone: Slight edge to howard.
Communication: telephone pole.
Production down the wire: telephone pole.
Box out: telephone pole.

matchup winner: telephone pole.

don't forget length goes to telephone pole

u can't teach height

[Mr. Jabbar]

don't forget length goes to telephone pole

u can't teach height

true. telephone pole is a clear winner.

congrats to telephone pole :applause:

[Nick Young]

Telephone pole has better fundamentals.

[funnystuff]

Communication is much better with telephone poll. And he can electrify the arena. However he is a bit of a pylon on defence. Still, he performs great when it gets down to the wire.

Howard, on the other hand, is a useless fkin ungrateful idiot.
:lol im dying

[red1]

Howard is a bit cornier. They're both usually salty once the temperature rises, but Dwight has way more butter on his fingers. Plus they're both useless during the season and sell out once the season is over.
lmao

[OhNoTimNoSho]

Telephone being an actual type of post has better post game than dwight.

[Just2McFly]

:roll: :roll: :roll:

[Eat Like A Bosh]

Once telephone pole gets in position no one can push him off his spot. He sets the hardest screens, and has unmatched length. He's not very mobile, and he's a bit lacking in offensive skills, but with the right PG he could probably be an offensive contributor.
This. :roll:

[Pushxx]

Telephone pole has the worst attitude in the NBA. Nikka just stands there, plays 48 minutes a night and never passes the ball. Still plays better defense than Dwight though. His boxing out skills are incredible.

Lol:lol

[Sarcastic]

Funny you bring this up, because here is Dwight looking just like a telephone pole.

http://s3-ec.buzzfed.com/static/enhanced/webdr02/2012/12/19/15/enhanced-buzz-23372-1355948928-4.jpg

[TheBigVeto]

It's a tie.
The telephone pole would lose any offensive skill if it has to play with Kobe.

[Mrofir]

wow, this is hilarious stuff. One of the funniest threads I've ever seen on here.

[insidehoops]

Bump, because this is silly but amusing

[TheFastOne]

Bump. Again.

[La Frescobaldi]

http://www.11alive.com/images/640/360/2/assetpool/photogallery/224745/jordan-bird-net.jpg

Off the top pole.... off the left wire..... off the footpeg....

nuthin but net

[Mr. Jabbar]

gotta give telephone pole the edge on flexibility too, dwights stiffness is unmatched

http://imageshack.us/a/img853/7172/1202723l.png

[TheeBeast]

Telephone being an actual type of post has better post game than dwight.

:roll: :applause:

[kingBynum]

telephone pole has more energy and spark too

[Magic bird]

Howard is a bit cornier. They're both usually salty once the temperature rises, but Dwight has way more butter on his fingers. Plus they're both useless during the season and sell out once the season is over.

:roll: :roll: :roll: :roll:

[clayton]

Time to show the world why Telephone Pole is superior to Dwight Howard, as he becomes the #1 option.

[Horde of Temujin]

:roll:

How far into the season before Houston experiences buyer's remorse?

[retaxis]

Its impossible to have buyers remorse when you have a superstar in Howard who is going to sell some major tickets and attract various other lucrative deals. Its the same reason why Lakers don't show remorse to Kobe despite paying him 30+mil for him to sit on the bench and watch the playoffs.

[spiegel]

As long as he gets us 20 and 14 plus a couple of blocks I could careless how he does it.

[spiegel]

:roll:

How far into the season before Houston experiences buyer's remorse?
No Yao>Dwight RG?

[Horde of Temujin]

Yao>Dwight

[Horde of Temujin]

I didn't want to create a new thread so I decided to bump this hilarious one.
I find it hard to believe how overrated this guy continues to be. He is often placed in top 5-10 players in the league. Dwight is clearly inferior to the following players, among others.


Lebron
Wade
Kobe
P. Gasol
M Gasol
Z Bo
Rondo
Westbrook
KD
Noah
Rose
KG
Deron W.
Pierce
J. Johnson
B. Lopez
Melo
Horford
Paul
S. Curry
Iggy
Pekovic
Love
Duncan
Parker
K Leonard
Dirk
Aldridge
Deng
P . George
D. West
Harden

[Droid101]

Bump, because this is silly but amusing
Jeff approved thread.

[Prometheus]

:roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll:

Well done Jabbar. 10/10.

[Smook A.]

Jeff approved thread.
did you really have to bump this thread? his offensive skill set it not equal to a telephone pole. Holy crap. That is some bull

[Milbuck]

:oldlol: How is anyone actually disputing TP > DH? Dwight better watch some tape, try to steal as many moves as possible.

[Pushxx]

Where is round 2? WTF? :wtf:

[Hamtaro CP3KDKG]

:roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: i rememba this thread:applause:

[JohnFreeman]

I would take the telephone line

[Hamtaro CP3KDKG]

I would take the telephone line
Real talk y do u hate Dwight but like Cousins?:wtf:

[JohnFreeman]

Real talk y do u hate Dwight but like Cousins?:wtf:
I am joking..I like Howard, but he is becoming a bit overrated.I am sure he will get better, if the injury is still affecting him. Cousins is just the more skilled big man (imo)