Dating Techniques

[IamRAMBO24]

What I've come to realize from all my years of dating is: if you want to get good with girls, you're going to need to date. Girls are complicated. It's not like the caveman days where you can club a girl on the head and drag her back to your cave and automatically have yourself a wife. Girls, for whatever reason, don't like that anymore.

DON'T GO ON DATES

It's common knowledge to go on dates, but don't. If you take a girl out on a date, you are basically trying to "buy" her love. Treating her out to dinner, buying flowers and clothes is nothing more than a weak attempt to try to convince her to like you. It doesn't work that way. Either a girl likes you or she don't. You can't convince her either way. Don't call her either. When a cute guy calls a girl, he's "sweet." When an ugly guy calls her, he's a stalker. This is why most girls have caller ID: to stay away from the stalker. If she's not interested in you, then there's really no point blowing up her phone 4-5 times a day.

If you do happen to go out on a date, don't put too much emphasis on it. Make it casual and treat her like a friend. In fact, don't even open the door for her, let her do it her damn self for once. If she looks at it confused, show her how it's done by turning the knob and pushing it forward. If you put all your eggs in one basket on the first date, you're nothing more than a serial rapist to them, don't do it.

HOW TO PICK UP GIRLS UP AT CLUBS

One thing great about clubs is alcohol. God gave us beer so ugly guys won't be spending their Saturday nights tugging away to MAXIM. It's the magical elixir that turns fat, ugly, bald, morally reprehensible guys into hot Rockstars. Get ready to buy her that extra shot of vodka or play some sort of drinking game so she'll forget your face is something straight out of a mug shot. If you still can't get with her after she's pissed out drunk, then I would recommend picking up a book called "Man's guide to dating Men." You know you don't have much of a chance with a girl if she still thinks you're ugly when she's drunk.

You should also be on the lookout for hot chicks on the dance floor. Once you spot one, go out on the dance floor and sandwich yourself between her and the guy she's dancing with. One thing about girls is they like an aggressive man. Do whatever you can to block the guy out. If he happens to move around you, bust the macarena and stretch your arms to prevent him from moving around you. The whole idea is keep in between long enough for him to give up and find some other chick. If he persists, and wants to whoop your ass, then don't back down. Girls like guys who can beat shit up. The only real problem I see is if the security gets involved. Some of them carry tazers nowadays. You don't want to mess with that because that shit hurts like a bitch. On the other hand, a security guard's strength could be his weakness: you see, that tazer could be your's if you're slick enough.

Those are just off the top of my head. Feel free to add your suggestions. Thanks.

[SevereUpInHere]

http://www.city-data.com/forum/relationships/642668-dating-tips.html

Lame and plagiarized

:facepalm

[IamRAMBO24]

http://www.city-data.com/forum/relationships/642668-dating-tips.html

Lame and plagiarized

:facepalm

Umm that's me dumbsh*t.

[B-Low]

http://www.city-data.com/forum/relationships/642668-dating-tips.html

Lame and plagiarized

:facepalm

:roll:

wow squashed on the first post. Negged to holy hell OP

[IamRAMBO24]

Speaking of which, I totally forgot that account and forum; will log back in and give a shout out to ISH.

[B-Low]

Umm that's me dumbsh*t.

Don't make it any worse! So that's you...you just happened to post that FOUR YEARS AGO and it just now hit you to say it here too? To quote GOBB...F*ck outta here :oldlol:

[IamRAMBO24]

:roll:

wow squashed on the first post. Negged to holy hell OP

http://www.city-data.com/forum/relationships/642668-dating-tips-2.html#post28744499

[IamRAMBO24]

Don't make it any worse! So that's you...you just happened to post that FOUR YEARS AGO and it just now hit you to say it here too? To quote GOBB...F*ck outta here :oldlol:

I find it as a compliment he would think my writing is so good it is plagiarized for him to take the time to do a google search. Kudos. :rockon:

[IamRAMBO24]

Whip it out. Solves everything.

Great idea. All the small talk, humor, going out, looks, style, etc. don't really matter. It's just stupid to even think about going the extra distance. Just whip it out when you approach a girl randomly in public and that will solve all your problems.

[9erempiree]

What I've come to realize from all my years of dating is: if you want to get good with girls, you're going to need to date. Girls are complicated. It's not like the caveman days where you can club a girl on the head and drag her back to your cave and automatically have yourself a wife. Girls, for whatever reason, don't like that anymore.

DON'T GO ON DATES

It's common knowledge to go on dates, but don't. If you take a girl out on a date, you are basically trying to "buy" her love. Treating her out to dinner, buying flowers and clothes is nothing more than a weak attempt to try to convince her to like you. It doesn't work that way. Either a girl likes you or she don't. You can't convince her either way. Don't call her either. When a cute guy calls a girl, he's "sweet." When an ugly guy calls her, he's a stalker. This is why most girls have caller ID: to stay away from the stalker. If she's not interested in you, then there's really no point blowing up her phone 4-5 times a day.

If you do happen to go out on a date, don't put too much emphasis on it. Make it casual and treat her like a friend. In fact, don't even open the door for her, let her do it her damn self for once. If she looks at it confused, show her how it's done by turning the knob and pushing it forward. If you put all your eggs in one basket on the first date, you're nothing more than a serial rapist to them, don't do it.

HOW TO PICK UP GIRLS UP AT CLUBS

One thing great about clubs is alcohol. God gave us beer so ugly guys won't be spending their Saturday nights tugging away to MAXIM. It's the magical elixir that turns fat, ugly, bald, morally reprehensible guys into hot Rockstars. Get ready to buy her that extra shot of vodka or play some sort of drinking game so she'll forget your face is something straight out of a mug shot. If you still can't get with her after she's pissed out drunk, then I would recommend picking up a book called "Man's guide to dating Men." You know you don't have much of a chance with a girl if she still thinks you're ugly when she's drunk.

You should also be on the lookout for hot chicks on the dance floor. Once you spot one, go out on the dance floor and sandwich yourself between her and the guy she's dancing with. One thing about girls is they like an aggressive man. Do whatever you can to block the guy out. If he happens to move around you, bust the macarena and stretch your arms to prevent him from moving around you. The whole idea is keep in between long enough for him to give up and find some other chick. If he persists, and wants to whoop your ass, then don't back down. Girls like guys who can beat shit up. The only real problem I see is if the security gets involved. Some of them carry tazers nowadays. You don't want to mess with that because that shit hurts like a bitch. On the other hand, a security guard's strength could be his weakness: you see, that tazer could be your's if you're slick enough.

Those are just off the top of my head. Feel free to add your suggestions. Thanks.

How can you be such an expert when you neglect your own girlfriend while she's getting fat.

:facepalm

[IamRAMBO24]

How can you be such an expert when you neglect your own girlfriend while she's getting fat.

:facepalm

Picking up picks is very different from trying to maintain one. That is something I never had a grasp on until I came here.

Some of the advices you guys gave me were great. Just wish I could actually find a way to implement them without offending her.

[SevereUpInHere]

http://www.city-data.com/forum/relationships/642668-dating-tips-2.html#post28744499


That's even more embarrassing that you wrote that and waited nearly 4 years to post it here.

:applause:

[9erempiree]

Picking up picks is very different from trying to maintain one. That is something I never had a grasp on until I came here.

Some of the advices you guys gave me were great. Just wish I could actually find a way to implement them without offending her.

You better research about maintaining then.

[IamRAMBO24]

You better research about maintaining then.

Naw this forum has already provided me enough material to start a plan of action; it all boils down to healthy eating and proper exercise. It's harder than you think.

[ace23]

http://www.city-data.com/forum/relationships/642668-dating-tips-2.html#post28744499
Damn, I really thought you were bluffing. Props. :applause: Will rep.

OP reeks of shit though.

[Mach_3]

Treat her like an option, and never be afraid to call them out on they bullsh1t.

A woman wants to marry a nice guy, but she wants to **** the asshole ni99a who treats her like nothing more than a d1ck strangling device.

[IamRAMBO24]

Treat her like an option, and never be afraid to call them out on they bullsh1t.

A woman wants to marry a nice guy, but she wants to **** the asshole ni99a who treats her like nothing more than a d1ck strangling device.

:oldlol:

You must have a very awesome d*ck to strangle a woman. Wow. Like what the ISH loves to say, "Pics or fake".

[SilkkTheShocker]

OP is one of the best posters on ISH. Lay off.

[Mach_3]

:oldlol:

You must have a very awesome d*ck to strangle a woman. Wow. Like what the ISH loves to say, "Pics or fake".


Well i meant when a female uses her hands to...**** it nevermind yes i do have a very awesome *****.

I can't post it here or else everyone on ISH would make dozens of topics asking why the site layout changed from a complete white background to a black one


:pimp:

[Mach_3]

It's common knowledge to go on dates, but don't. If you take a girl out on a date, you are basically trying to "buy" her love. Treating her out to dinner, buying flowers and clothes is nothing more than a weak attempt to try to convince her to like you. It doesn't work that way. Either a girl likes you or she don't. You can't convince her either way. Don't call her either. When a cute guy calls a girl, he's "sweet." When an ugly guy calls her, he's a stalker. This is why most girls have caller ID: to stay away from the stalker. If she's not interested in you, then there's really no point blowing up her phone 4-5 times a day.


This is actually good advice, i also wanted to change the bolded to, "Either a girl is ATTRACTED to you or she isn't". Trust me theres a big difference, i've had sex with so many women who didn't like me but were attracted to my natural persona

[IamRAMBO24]

This is actually good advice, i also wanted to change the bolded to, "Either a girl is ATTRACTED to you or she isn't". Trust me theres a big difference, i've had sex with so many women who didn't like me but were attracted to my natural persona

True.

This is so hard for many guys to get *cough* bladers *cough* but when a girl really likes you, it doesn't matter how stupid or idiotic you come off, she'll still think it's cute, and when you start trying too hard, she'll think you are a stalker *cough* bladers *cough* who thinks licking her ass will change her mind. Little does he know she ate a huge bean burrito and about to give him a rude awakening.

[IamRAMBO24]

OP is one of the best posters on ISH. Lay off.

Thank you.

You are a saint.

[IamRAMBO24]

Buncha homos in this thread.

Like my gay friend used to say, "Don't hate, participate."

[Bandito]

Like my gay friend used to say, "Don't hate, participate."
Used? What happened to him? Did he choke on a pen1s and died?:roll: :roll: :roll:

I feel ashamed:facepalm :(

[CarlosBoozer]

Whip it out. Solves everything.
http://25.media.tumblr.com/c299e91ab246f7bba34396f857106d2c/tumblr_mgma6mjbcu1riv1vvo1_500.gif

[Batz]

Whip it out. Solves everything.
Bitch that's my line. :mad:

[IamRAMBO24]

A literary classic that needs to be bump.

[riseagainst]

OP has a very good point. Everything was the truth.

:applause:

I would rep you but it wouldn't make a difference.

[Solidape]

http://www.city-data.com/forum/relationships/642668-dating-tips.html

Lame and plagiarized

:facepalm

:applause: :applause:

[russwest0]

You should also be on the lookout for hot chicks on the dance floor. Once you spot one, go out on the dance floor and sandwich yourself between her and the guy she's dancing with. One thing about girls is they like an aggressive man. Do whatever you can to block the guy out. If he happens to move around you, bust the macarena and stretch your arms to prevent him from moving around you. The whole idea is keep in between long enough for him to give up and find some other chick. If he persists, and wants to whoop your ass, then don't back down. Girls like guys who can beat shit up. The only real problem I see is if the security gets involved. Some of them carry tazers nowadays. You don't want to mess with that because that shit hurts like a bitch. On the other hand, a security guard's strength could be his weakness: you see, that tazer could be your's if you're slick enough.

:roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll:

Legit lol'd at this part. Good shit.

[GimmeThat]

just be homeless