Should you or should you not whoop your kids?

[Jameerthefear]

I was just thinking right now that when I have kids I'm never going to spank them. Hope when I grow up I don't forget that. What do you current and future ISH parents think? :cheers:

[Rick James]

Timeouts and groundings always works. Also a cut on allowance.

I disagree with being violent to your children. Because it only teaches your children that they need to be violent to gain respect and get a point across. Crime rates in inner cities attest to my claims.

[Budadiiii]

I think there's better ways of disciplining your kids. Parents who spank have piss poor genetics and are lazy in general. If your kid is a little brat who can't mind then you have piss poor genetics - plain and simple. Parents who pass on their lousy DNA to their lousy offspring tend to spank their kids. Take out their pent up anger on their shitty kids... what losers. :facepalm

[GOBB]

Whooping kids can work. That is what I'll do.

[Budadiiii]

Whooping kids works. That is what I'll do.
Case in point.

[Jameerthefear]

I think there's better ways of disciplining your kids. Parents who spank have piss poor genetics and are lazy in general. If your kid is a little brat who can't mind then you have piss poor genetics - plain and simple. Parents who pass on their lousy DNA to their lousy offspring tend to spank their kids. Take out their pent up anger on their shitty kids... what losers. :facepalm
I wouldn't say all that...

[Scholar]

Time-outs, stern talks and non-violent punishments are the way to go.

By beating a kid, you're really just telling them, "Hey, if you don't like what someone is doing, beat them up." Kids learn from everything we do. Trust me, I know by experience as a father.

There are always parents who will tell you that their kid doesn't respond to time-outs & etc., so that's why they spank their kids. Umm... Maybe because they need tried TALKING? Right? It's always been about spanking, so now they think it's too late to discipline the child any other way.

[ballup]

You have to establish the pecking order somehow.

[GOBB]

I wouldn't say all that...

He's the kid who cursed out his mother in the store in front of adults. When in reality his mother should have popped him in the mouth, grabbed him by his suspenders and nearly choked him blue. :pimp:

[andgar923]

I was just thinking right now that when I have kids I'm never going to spank them. Hope when I grow up I don't forget that. What do you current and future ISH parents think? :cheers:
I def will.

Not BEAT them, but def spank them and if needed hit them enough to get some sense into them.

I was blessed to have my dad in my life. I could've easily turned the wrong way but all it took was one beating and I was set straight. I never tested his nerves again. Whenever I found myself in situations that could've easily got me in trouble, I thought about him beating the shit outta me.

never again.

A child needs to learn authority and respect. They can't see you as a 'friend' or they'll test those boundaries, and when they do they need to be reminded who the adult is.

[Rick James]

Whooping kids can work. That is what I'll do.

Get ready for your child to be involved in school fights, then evolving into drug dealing and street captain wars. Evolving to making false claiming "hood" rap DVDs and a funeral in his name at the age of 19.

Daughter? Get ready for her to be the loud mouth 17yr old baby mama I'll be denying at the welfare office.

[CanYouDigIt]

Parents who don't discipline their kids in anyway are worse than parents who do.

Ass-whoopings at a young age aren't really effective, yelling and grounding your kids is the best for little children.

For teenagers, I'd beat the sh*t out of him/her with a belt if they do something seriously bad. I would then ground them.

Kids -> Yell + Ground

Teens -> Whoop + Ground

[Budadiiii]

Time-outs, stern talks and non-violent punishments are the way to go.

By beating a kid, you're really just telling them, "Hey, if you don't like what someone is doing, beat them up." Kids learn from everything we do. Trust me, I know by experience as a father.

There are always parents who will tell you that their kid doesn't respond to time-outs & etc., so that's why they spank their kids. Umm... Maybe because they need tried TALKING? Right? It's always been about spanking, so now they think it's too late to discipline the child any other way.
Good post. I agree 100%.

I grew up around kids who's parents spanked them - they FEARED their parents, and I don't mean that in a good way. My dad lead by example - worked his ass off every single day and I intuitively knew what he expected of me. That's where common sense and genetics come to play. I just don't have an answer for kids who don't have common sense or a moral compass. They're the losers of society.

[CanYouDigIt]

Also, if I found out my black son from Alabama is shy at school, likes the Orlando Magic, and watches hentai..... I'd f*cking beat the sh*t out of him until he learns to be normal.

[GOBB]

Get ready for your child to be involved in school fights, then evolving into drug dealing and street captain wars. Evolving to making false claiming "hood" rap DVDs and a funeral in his name at the age of 19.

Daughter? Get ready for her to be the loud mouth 17yr old baby mama I'll be denying at the welfare office.

Me and my sister received whoopings. None of the above happened. Sucks being wrong no?

[andgar923]

Also, if I found out my black son from Alabama is shy at school, likes the Orlando Magic, and watches hentai..... I'd f*cking beat the sh*t out of him until he learns to be normal.
:roll: :roll: :roll: :roll:

Def this

[Rick James]

Me and my sister received whoopings. None of the above happened. Sucks being wrong no?

Just looking at statistics. Times today are worst.

[andgar923]

Bunch of prissy wooses we got here.

"Listen, timeout!! no please stop screaming at me, you go sit in the corner and think about your actions. Ouch, what did I tell you about hitting me? please timeout go sit in the corner. Please stop saying those words, you are forbidden from saying those, it's time for your timeout!!! please listen to me?!?!?"

:facepalm

Kids need discipline or they'll walk all over you.

You can't have your kids running all over the place, doing what they want. Hopefully some of you are blessed to have kids that don't need any discipline.

[GOBB]

I'll even go further with it. My best friend mom handed out whoopings. So when I'd go over his crib and we act up? She gave us the business. If we went over his grandmoms and thought it was sweet? Same deal. And his mother would say (like my mom) after one of us were being dropped off at the others crib?

"You have my permission if my son acts like a fool I pop the shyt out of him"

Me and my best friend at those moments never laughed, chuckled or anything because we knew their words held weight. They were not just saying it for fun.


So yeah both of us are currently pumping drugs in the community.

[Jameerthefear]

Also, if I found out my black son from Alabama is shy at school, likes the Orlando Magic, and watches hentai..... I'd f*cking beat the sh*t out of him until he learns to be normal.
I actually do still get spankings..

[GOBB]

Just looking at statistics. Times today are worst.

Or I can look at you typing out of your ass instead.

[CanYouDigIt]

I actually do still get spankings..
I'm gonna nominate your parents for Parents of the Year :applause:

[Rick James]

Or I can look at you typing out of your ass instead.

Can't take the heat, get out of the kitchen. I am a man who does no such thing as "typing out of my ass". I type truth, can't handle it, bow down or get out.

[andgar923]

Just looking at statistics. Times today are worst.
wtf are you talking about?

The kids that DIDN'T receive discipline are the main ones joining gangs. Now, there is a difference between a dead beat dad that drinks and beats their kids for fun, and somebody that disciplines their child.

I grew up around gangs when they were at their peak. I grew around the 'crack' epidemic and I know the kids that joined gangs. They were kids of single parent homes, dead beat dads that were drunk/high and beat them for fun. Now that is a huge NO.

But disciplining your child with a whooping for acting up is completely different than what I mentioned above.

I grew up with kids from both worlds.

Those that received discipline didn't go the wrong path.
Those that didn't receive any discipline did what they wanted because they weren't afraid of authority.
Those that got beat by their drunk fathers knew of only violence as an option.

I'd def hit my child to discipline them. But I'd explain to them why I did it, what the consequences are if they did it again, and why their actions are wrong.

[Rick James]

Bunch of prissy wooses we got here.

"Listen, timeout!! no please stop screaming at me, you go sit in the corner and think about your actions. Ouch, what did I tell you about hitting me? please timeout go sit in the corner. Please stop saying those words, you are forbidden from saying those, it's time for your timeout!!! please listen to me?!?!?"

:facepalm

Kids need discipline or they'll walk all over you.

You can't have your kids running all over the place, doing what they want. Hopefully some of you are blessed to have kids that don't need any discipline.

Your way off. It's about molding a child from day 1 to understand who's the alpha Male without laying a finger on them. It's voice sounding and tone. Why you think those who take this approach with their kids don't have as many violent inner city gang infested children as those who physically abuse their children do?

[outbreak]

I don't think beating your kids is ok, but I think a little tap is fine, shouldn't be hard enough to hurt the kid or really cause any pain but it's more the shock of it that has an effect.

[HarryCallahan]

What'd your Pops whoop you for this time OP? Did he try and buy something on amazon and see the cart filled with oreimo?

[Jameerthefear]

What'd your Pops whoop you for this time OP? Did he try and buy something on amazon and see the cart filled with oreimo?
nah i didn't get any whoopings since my last thread. it was just on my mind. if my dad ever found out what that show was about i'd seriously fear for my life.

[andgar923]

Your way off. It's about molding a child from day 1 to understand who's the alpha Male without laying a finger on them. It's voice sounding and tone. Why you think those who take this approach with their kids don't have as many violent inner city gang infested children as those who physically abuse their children do?

It sounds great in theory. Every parent wishes that were the case, but unfortunately it doesn't always work out that way.

Hopefully it does, not saying it doesn't. I'm also not saying that I want to spank my kids, I don't think parents want to do that.

But kids are kids and a stern voice won't always work. At times you're gonna have to spank or even beat them for THEIR OWN GOOD.

I've seen this shit for far too long, been around all sorts of parents, all sorts of families. They may have a child that doesn't need physical discipline, while the same parents under the same conditions have another kid that NEEDS to be whooped or they won't listen. Eventually the whooping isn't needed anymore and they understand authority.

But it IS needed from time to time unfortunately.

[Jameerthefear]

I think if I didn't get spankings I'd have felt more confident in myself. Like not have terrible self confidence. I'm better than I used to be though.

[HarryCallahan]

nah i didn't get any whoopings since my last thread. it was just on my mind. if my dad ever found out what that show was about i'd seriously fear for my life.

You're 15 right? When do you think you'll be able to take the old man? Have you tried yet? The future is now.

[G-train]

If you don't give your kid a smack every now and again for being naughty you either a) aren't a parent or b) now have a disrespectful terd for a child.

[HarryCallahan]

I think if I didn't get spankings I'd have felt more confident in myself. Like not have terrible self confidence. I'm better than I used to be though.

Stand up for yourself, you'll gain confidence. Kick the crap out of the old man.

[Rick James]

It sounds great in theory. Every parent wishes that were the case, but unfortunately it doesn't always work out that way.

Hopefully it does, not saying it doesn't. I'm also not saying that I want to spank my kids, I don't think parents want to do that.

But kids are kids and a stern voice won't always work. At times you're gonna have to spank or even beat them for THEIR OWN GOOD.

I've seen this shit for far too long, been around all sorts of parents, all sorts of families. They may have a child that doesn't need physical discipline, while the same parents under the same conditions have another kid that NEEDS to be whooped or they won't listen. Eventually the whooping isn't needed anymore and they understand authority.

But it IS needed from time to time unfortunately.

Physical violence to a child is never needed. Beating a child is a copout for the parent's lack of parenting skills during an early age. Those are the parents who thinks It's cute or funny for their 2 yr old to scream expletives. Or hang around horrible influences. That's why there's a fight against child abuse and hotlines for abused children.

Imagine how it looks if someone you love is physically abusing you non stop forcing you to cry in pain? It's just as bad as the US and It's interrogation program. It's despicable.

[andgar923]

Physical violence to a child is never needed. Beating a child is a copout for the parent's lack of parenting skills during an early age. Those are the parents who thinks It's cute or funny for their 2 yr old to scream expletives. Or hang around horrible influences. That's why there's a fight against child abuse and hotlines for abused children.

Imagine how it looks if someone you love is physically abusing you non stop forcing you to cry in pain? It's just as bad as the US and It's interrogation program. It's despicable.
:rolleyes:

[Rick James]

:rolleyes:

Expected response from a child abuser.

[DukeDelonte13]

me and my siblings all received whoopings and we all turned out fine. I see kids tell their parents to "shut up" sometimes.

Man i would never have DREAMED of telling my parents to "shut up" or talk back to them in any sort of disrespectful manner.

I think there is a fine line between a whooping and child abuse.

[tmacattack33]

nah i didn't get any whoopings since my last thread. it was just on my mind. if my dad ever found out what that show was about i'd seriously fear for my life.

What's it about?

I never understood that sh*t and i see ppl with avatars of it from time to time.

It's like ninja shit isn't it? Why is that so bad?

[gts]

Each kid is different. I have 3

The oldest you just have to look at her and she's apologizing, hell she rats herself out. lol

The middle one is more difficult with her learning disability. That's on a whole other level of how you get your point across and it changes daily.

The youngest is stubborn, she gets the occasional swat on the butt just to get her attention, then we talk about it. She'll knowingly push and push until she pisses you off. My dad calls her his avenging grandchild, she's the one who's here onearht to put me through the same thing I put my parents through... ha

[HarryCallahan]

What's it about?

I never understood that sh*t and i see ppl with avatars of it from time to time.

It's like ninja shit isn't it? Why is that so bad?

Nahhhh, the shit he doesn't want his dad to see is not ninja stuff. Google "oreimo"

[Jameerthefear]

Each kid is different. I have 3

The oldest you just have to look at her and she's apologizing, hell she rats herself out. lol

The middle one is more difficult with her learning disability. That's on a whole other level of how you get your point across and it changes daily.

The youngest is stubborn, she gets the occasional swat on the butt just to get her attention, then we talk about it. She'll knowingly push and push until she pisses you off. My dad calls her his avenging grandchild, she's the one who's here onearht to put me through the same thing I put my parents through... ha
I think that's true. Some kids can't learn anything unless they get the sht kicked out of them I guess.

[Cherry Picker]

I got beats and looking back I deserved them.

[Jameerthefear]

I got beats and looking back I deserved them.
Solos or pros? I've been looking to get a pair for a while now and what to know what their like.

[PHX_Phan]

You have to establish levels of punishment. If you think simple time outs and getting loud with a child is going to turn them straight, you have another thing coming. That shit will not work with a kid. Whooping is a necessary punishment for extreme behavior. The problem is when a whooping turns into a beating, or when kids are getting whooped for minor offenses.

Maybe it's just me, but the current generation of parents seem so soft. Go any place where you'll find kids and they're all disrespectful little brats. It seems like hearing an 8 year old back talk his mom and receive absolutely no backlash is so common that it's the norm now. You pretty much expect it.

[HarryCallahan]

I think that's true. Some kids can't learn anything unless they get the sht kicked out of them I guess.

Some kids are stupid and benefit from the occasional smack on the backside. You are obviously not one of these kids. Your dad really shouldn't hit you.


Solos or pros? I've been looking to get a pair for a while now and what to know what their like.


:coleman:

[MavsSuperFan]

I am not always against corporal punishment it depends on the child

some kids are more rebellious/bratty and need to be spanked when they do something wrong.

Also corporal punishment must always be kept within reason. It probably doesnt need to be said for 99% of people, but you hear horror stories from time to time about dads who break noses, give black eyes, break limbs and/or put out cigarettes on their kids.

I dont like the wording beating/whoop. There is a big difference between a spanking and a beating. IMO you should never hit a child in the head or do anything that may cause permanent damage.

Second of all i look down at parents who beat their kids out of anger. One of my exs told me her dad beat her and her siblings for small stuff like dropping food on the ground or losing at sports. She later realized it was because he was angry about his life and had no one else to take his anger out on other than his family. The beatings were worst when their dad was unemployed.

there is a big difference between hitting kids to teach them something and beating them to take out your frustration.

I would only beat a child as a last resort. I would try to explain to them why what they are doing is wrong. I would try to use non-physical corrective measures, such as making them do extra chores/homework and removing stuff they like. But if that doesnt correct the behavior then, I would resort to inflicting physical pain.

[gts]

I think that's true. Some kids can't learn anything unless they get the sht kicked out of them I guess.:lol

A quick swat on the butt is a lot different then getting the shit kicked out of you...

No kid deserves to be physically injured no matter how bad they are... If it gets to the point that beatings become a consideration for a parent you have to seriously reexamine your approach to parenting and/or if the kid needs to be under somebody else's care

[MavsSuperFan]

If you don't give your kid a smack every now and again for being naughty you either a) aren't a parent or b) now have a disrespectful terd for a child.
Not every child needs to be beaten.

I have never been beaten and I am just about the most respectful person I know.

My parents managed to appeal to my logic, morals and sense of guilt in order to keep me in line. Eg. I would never steal from anyone, One time I found a wallet on the ground, and I returned it to the owner.

It is possible to explain things to children and teach them to do whats right, because it is the moral thing to do, rather than to make them do the right thing because they are afraid of the consequences.

[Bucket_Nakedz]

Timeouts and groundings always works. Also a cut on allowance.

I disagree with being violent to your children. Because it only teaches your children that they need to be violent to gain respect and get a point across. Crime rates in inner cities attest to my claims.
gtfoh wit dat bullshiet. that has nothing to do with physical disciplinary acts. statistics are for idiots who use numbers as a claim for ones own agenda.

it depends on the parent. kids are born curious, and i don't want to get in the way of my children learning on their own even if it will hurt them. u gotta fall to learn. but there has to be a precedent on how much freedom parents give them. and if they cross that line, they have to be reminded for their own protection and for others.

[oh the horror]

Get ready for your child to be involved in school fights, then evolving into drug dealing and street captain wars. Evolving to making false claiming "hood" rap DVDs and a funeral in his name at the age of 19.

Daughter? Get ready for her to be the loud mouth 17yr old baby mama I'll be denying at the welfare office.



I was spanked. I never did any of those things. But okay.

[MavsSuperFan]

You have to establish levels of punishment. If you think simple time outs and getting loud with a child is going to turn them straight, you have another thing coming. That shit will not work with a kid. Whooping is a necessary punishment for extreme behavior. The problem is when a whooping turns into a beating, or when kids are getting whooped for minor offenses.

Maybe it's just me, but the current generation of parents seem so soft. Go any place where you'll find kids and they're all disrespectful little brats. It seems like hearing an 8 year old back talk his mom and receive absolutely no backlash is so common that it's the norm now. You pretty much expect it.

anyone that thinks that is stupid, but you realize there is a million things you can do in between random yelling and spankings right?

My parents got creative with punishments. Eg. They made me take over for the gardener and do his job for a week when I was about 12, because I had complained about not being bought a new toy. It made me realize how easy my life was and I havent felt entitled to stuff ever since. I think if they just beat me at best i would have felt too scared to ask for stuff, but in the back of my mind I would still think I was right, its just that they had more might.

Edit: I just wanted to add that prior to this experience I had complained that my dad collected cars and didnt buy me stuff I wanted. I learned from this that the key difference was it was his money, from his work, and not mine. If I had just gotten beaten I think in the back of my mind I might have thought that my parents were just being selfish in not buying me every toy I wanted, even when they used their money for leisure. The beating would have stopped me from voicing this, but in my mind I would have thought I was right.

I think the key is to explain to your child why what they are doing is wrong. Eg. It is wrong to steal, because you are being incredibly selfish and are taking the livelihood of another person.

Just beating your kids doesnt teach them morals. It makes them afraid to do something wrong. Some day they grow up and if they only reason they werent stealing stuff was because they were afraid of a whooping, well now they are out of the house. IMO you need to actually explain to your children why certain things are morally wrong.

[oh the horror]

And some of you need to read. No one is saying "beat". Spanking and a beating are two vastly different things.

[oh the horror]

anyone that thinks that is stupid, but you realize there is a million things you can do in between random yelling and spankings right?

My parents got creative with punishments. Eg. They made me take over for the gardener and do his job for a week when I was about 12, because I had complained about not being bought a new toy. It made me realize how easy my life was and I havent felt entitled to stuff ever since. I think if they just beat me at best i would have felt too scared to ask for stuff, but in the back of my mind I would still think I was right, its just that they had more might.

I think the key is to explain to your child why what they are doing is wrong. Eg. It is wrong to steal, because you are being incredibly selfish and are taking the livelihood of another person.

Just beating your kids doesnt teach them morals. It makes them afraid to do something wrong. Some day they grow up and if they only reason they werent stealing stuff was because they were afraid of a whooping, well now they are out of the house. IMO you need to actually explain to your children why certain things are morally wrong.

Okay. Explain to a 5 year old why something is morally wrong.

[MavsSuperFan]

Okay. Explain to a 5 year old why something is morally wrong.

You can begin the process here. Maybe at first it wont sink in, but eventually it will, unless he was born a sociopath (some people have a chemical imbalance in their brains)

Eventually you should explain to your kids why something is morally wrong and why something is morally right. Not just beat them and threaten to beat them again if they do it. thats an abdication of the parenting process imo

what age do you believe its appropriate to explain the rationale behind why they are being punished?

[PHX_Phan]

anyone that thinks that is stupid, but you realize there is a million things you can do in between random yelling and spankings right?

My parents got creative with punishments. Eg. They made me take over for the gardener and do his job for a week when I was about 12, because I had complained about not being bought a new toy. It made me realize how easy my life was and I havent felt entitled to stuff ever since. I think if they just beat me at best i would have felt too scared to ask for stuff, but in the back of my mind I would still think I was right, its just that they had more might.


I'm talking about a younger age. By the age of 12 a little ass whooping is nothing (assuming you are just giving them a 'whooping' and not actually hitting your kids). It's just a slap that will sting for a little and then it's over. By then it's better to get your point across by taking away their games or whatever toy they are immersed in.

But for much younger kids? You cannot use reason and logic to get a point across. A whooping is a much more serious thing at that age, and really the only way to deal with certain kids.

Thinking back, I think I only ever caught the belt twice as a kid. After that, all it really took was for my parents/grandparents to start undoing that first loop and I shaped up before it came all the way off.

[ihoopallday]

:lol This was actually a discussion topic in my developmental psychology class this week. Got pretty heated between the people who have kids. I just sat there and enjoyed the show. Kinda hard to chime in since I have no kids and don't remember being spanked much as a child.

[ace23]

I think if I didn't get spankings I'd have felt more confident in myself. Like not have terrible self confidence. I'm better than I used to be though.
This. I'm fine now, but it took a while to get over it. I feel corny typing this. :oldlol:

[HeatFanSince88]

Also, if I found out my black son from Alabama is shy at school, likes the Orlando Magic, and watches hentai..... I'd f*cking beat the sh*t out of him until he learns to be normal.

:roll:

thats clearly why he made the thread, his dad just whooped his ass and he wants to know what people think of it.:roll:

[SpurrDurr]

A spank or a slap once in a while when kids really deserve it, it's the way to go.

Worse parents are the enabler ones, kids usually grow spoiled and arrogant.

[Le Shaqtus]

My dad whooped me when I was a kid and I came out fine, he just did it for the right reasons.

If my kids act out for no good reason they gon get what's comin

[TheReturn]

I actually do still get spankings..
http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ljz6lcGRO61qz4u07.jpg

[JEFFERSON MONEY]

I think there's better ways of disciplining your kids. Parents who spank have piss poor genetics and are lazy in general. If your kid is a little brat who can't mind then you have piss poor genetics - plain and simple. Parents who pass on their lousy DNA to their lousy offspring tend to spank their kids. Take out their pent up anger on their shitty kids... what losers. :facepalm

Agreed.

Use firm logic and firmer boundaries.

I can almost immediately tell which Asians (Both Oriental and South and SE) are socially smart and fun to be around by the lack of being beaten into submission and academics depending on their pedigree.

Cool headed clever parents raise cool headed clever kids.

using fear is so fukking weak. Expect their to be repercussions. Like tying a rope around an elephant at birth and getting trampled once the fellow realizes its big enough.

It's not a surprise that my brother and I value the opinions of about a million people before my parents. And rightfully so.

[MavsSuperFan]

I'm talking about a younger age. By the age of 12 a little ass whooping is nothing (assuming you are just giving them a 'whooping' and not actually hitting your kids). It's just a slap that will sting for a little and then it's over. By then it's better to get your point across by taking away their games or whatever toy they are immersed in.

But for much younger kids? You cannot use reason and logic to get a point across. A whooping is a much more serious thing at that age, and really the only way to deal with certain kids.

Thinking back, I think I only ever caught the belt twice as a kid. After that, all it really took was for my parents/grandparents to start undoing that first loop and I shaped up before it came all the way off.

Maybe I am weird, but I distinctly remember the ability to feel shame and empathy at age 5 at the latests.

I remember in kindergarten stealing another kids lunch box, because it had the power rangers on it, and I was super into the power rangers at the time. I got caught and my dad made me apologize to the other kid and his family and my dad apologized too. Later we had what seemed like a never ending talk about what I did and why it was wrong. I was crying by the end of them telling me how disappointed they were in me.

If my dad had just beat me, I probably wouldnt have stolen again, but the reason I wouldnt have would be because i feared the consequences and I have always been risk adverse. Deep down I might have not come to the conclusion what I did was wrong.

its ok to spank your kids, (with in reason, I mean you shouldnt being punching them in the face) but I think its the lazy way of parenting, and you should at the very least explain to them later why they got spanked.

[MavsSuperFan]

A spank or a slap once in a while when kids really deserve it, it's the way to go.

Worse parents are the enabler ones, kids usually grow spoiled and arrogant.
2 points

1. There is dozens of disciplinary actions you can take as a parent short of spanking a child. You can force them to do something they deem unpleasant Eg. Forcing them to do extra chores and/or homework, forcing them to learn a second language, enrolling them into a piano class or something.

You can disallow them something they enjoy. Eg. No more TV for a period, All your siblings get dessert, except you, you dont get to go to the water park today, you don't get to play with your friends this weekend, you cant use the computer for a few days, etc.

2. Most evidence indicates that spanking/corporal punishment by itself doesnt prevent bad behavior or build morals in the long term.

I remember reading a study that showed that almost all inmates at prison were subjected to spankings as a child. If spanking was such an effective behavior corrector, why did it not prevent these men from ending up in prison?

[boozehound]

I was just thinking right now that when I have kids I'm never going to spank them. Hope when I grow up I don't forget that. What do you current and future ISH parents think? :cheers:
I should probably whoop OP. Most parents cant handle reasonable physical punishment. They either go overboard and beat their kids for stupid shit or because they can't control their emotions or they wont ever use it.

[highwhey]

Maybe I am weird, but I distinctly remember the ability to feel shame and empathy at age 5 at the latests.

I remember in kindergarten stealing another kids lunch box, because it had the power rangers on it, and I was super into the power rangers at the time. I got caught and my dad made me apologize to the other kid and his family and my dad apologized too. Later we had what seemed like a never ending talk about what I did and why it was wrong. I was crying by the end of them telling me how disappointed they were in me.

If my dad had just beat me, I probably wouldnt have stolen again, but the reason I wouldnt have would be because i feared the consequences and I have always been risk adverse. Deep down I might have not come to the conclusion what I did was wrong.

its ok to spank your kids, (with in reason, I mean you shouldnt being punching them in the face) but I think its the lazy way of parenting, and you should at the very least explain to them later why they got spanked.

I believe both types are necessary. My father would give me a mild whooping, nothing criminal but it instilled fear in me. My mom would then explain to me what I did was wrong. I know a lot of my cousins were punished in a similar manner, and most of them turned out well, that is, they know how to make good decisions not because of fear but because they know how to differentiate between wrong and right, ie. They have morals. If you're going to give your kid a beating, it's essential that you try to imprint your morals on them.

[Scholar]

Agreed.

Use firm logic and firmer boundaries.

I can almost immediately tell which Asians (Both Oriental and South and SE) are socially smart and fun to be around by the lack of being beaten into submission and academics depending on their pedigree.

Cool headed clever parents raise cool headed clever kids.

using fear is so fukking weak. Expect their to be repercussions. Like tying a rope around an elephant at birth and getting trampled once the fellow realizes its big enough.

It's not a surprise that my brother and I value the opinions of about a million people before my parents. And rightfully so.

Exactly. My brother and I were beaten into submission by our father for small things like having a C on a test. Shit was ridiculous. And today our father wonders why we rarely contact him.
A lot of Desis are like this. They beat their kids relentlessly, and IF the kid turns out to be great at something (HAS to be a high paying job like being a doctor or lawyer, or else you're considered a failure), the parents act like it's all their doing, so then the beatings seem justified to them & everyone who knows them.
If the kid doesn't end up being a financial success, it's all the kid's own doing & he just didn't get beaten enough.

I hope you don't get offended by this, J$, but I swear I hate the Desi culture.

[Scholar]

:cheers: , Jefferson. That's how I feel, bro. I've got cousins who are still living with their parents all while being married, having kids, etc. They'll still get all smacked for disagreeing with their parents about trivial matter. :oldlol:

Anyway, I kind of understand where my dad came from with the beatings because he was beaten by his own dad, his dad was beaten by his own, and so on and so forth. I guess he just didn't know any other way, but I got beaten senseless as a kid until my late teen years, I didn't know any other parenting style, and yet I'm managing to raise my kid without having laid a finger on her. And guess what? She doesn't fear me, but instead respects me. If I tell her "No," she knows it's the final word. When my dad would tell me "No!!!!" I knew it was the final word only because I didn't want to get an ass whooping for asking again.

I wish the culture I was raised in was different, but it's not. I suppose I'm not only a first generation American in my family but also a first generation "rather-talk-to-my-kid-than-beat-her" parent.

Btw, my daughter is only 3, so maybe she isn't a great example to use yet, but I know of many SE Asians who whoop their kids at young ages for doing less than half the silly things my kid has gotten a "time-out" about.

[boozehound]

Dude the only reaction I felt after reading this was HOLY HELL SOMEONE OUT THERE WHO THINKS LIKE ME :cheers:


And it's not that I hate Pakis or Indians. There are a lot of cool things about their culture. Some of the most fearsome warriors came from the tribes. They have a solid sense of community and a pretty cool arrangement. But my god they have to fukking realize that half the game of life is ADAPTING to NEW CIRCUMSTANCES. You don't just adhere to "parampara" over and over and over and over again and make slave-like males study hard blah blah blah. In between that transition from kid to adult life there must be experimentation, and for that I have a deep reverence for Western hippies lol. No wonder Desis are socially stunted and emotionally bankrupt.

But god be damned they'll be so uppity and proud about the beating thing too. They will literally vehemently use examples of misbehaving or underachieving white kids as testament to their worthwhile parenting.. yeah okay. Continue the fukking cycle. again and again. Wawaweewah cash, family, status, and prestige. Congratufukkinglations.

Those white kids may not have had the kind of grades I did but they were EONS ahead of me in terms of being a real authentic human being. And that accounts for more then academic prowess. There's an article I read recently...
from an author named Tom Robbins (a literature guy) who described the 6 traits that SPECIFICALLY are exclusive to humans


How many of these beaten kids do you know are deficit in those areas? Tons.

I'm glad you're paving your own path in unorthodox fashion man. Your daughter ought to be proud as a peacock that you did the 'Murican thang. Went your individual way.
You should read that whole book. He is awesome, particularly that book.

[dude77]

nothing wrong with being disciplined .. people are confusing child abuse with disciplining

[senelcoolidge]

^ Yeah, there is nothing wrong with disciplining your children. Actually you should do it, if they are disobedient. Spanking should not be the first course of discipline. You talk to your kid..show them it's wrong. If they continue than perhaps..it all depends on the situation. No one else should tell you how to raise your children..unless it's actually abuse..like starving your children or beating them to submission.
When I was in grade school I had a classmate that did something wrong. His father was called to the school..the father grabbed his son took him outside of the class and spanked him. It seemed harsh, but that's parenting. That was the 80's and this was a West Indian family..so different time and culture. My father was strict, I got spankings. I'm grateful that I did. Even as an adult I respect my parents..I very rarely spoke back to them growing up. It thought me to be respectful and follow rules. Unlike many other kids I see today that talk back to their parents, do drugs, and are an embarrassment.

[Scholar]

To beat or not to beat? That is the question.

[$LakerGold]

I say twice a year, if they constantly **** up. My little brother is like 7 & he's been yelling at my parents since he was 5 every time he's mad/upset. He don't do it to me though very often though, cuz he knows I'm going to whoop his ass.

It's their fault they spoil/baby him, so they get used to that & they know my parents won't do anything --- NOTHING. Parent's so over-protective too.

This kid was using my laptop & then I went to hug him, & all of a sudden he's yelling at me to get off cuz it's too much... I'm like "B*tch, GTFO :no: "

There's 2 of them. 7 & 5. I'm glad I'm moving out next year. Sayonara :oldlol:

[Draz]

Also, if I found out my black son from Alabama is shy at school, likes the Orlando Magic, and watches hentai..... I'd f*cking beat the sh*t out of him until he learns to be normal.
:roll:

[Jameerthefear]

To beat or not to beat? That is the question.
kind of sounds lewd...

[Jameerthefear]

Maybe some of you were asshole kids who got hit because your parents were assholes and you emulated them?
I'm a pretty good kid :lol

[TheReal Kendall]

Spare the rod, spoil the child.

I'm glad I got whoopings when I ****ed up when I was a kid.

That shit taught me right from wrong.

Even though my mom told me not to do something I would do it anyway but once she put that belt to my ass I didn't do it again

[shlver]

Brainwashing>Spanking.

[Rick James]

Spare the rod, spoil the child.

I'm glad I got whoopings when I ****ed up when I was a kid.

That shit taught me right from wrong.

Even though my mom told me not to do something I would do it anyway but once she put that belt to my ass I didn't do it again

You know why you still did things after she told you not too? Because your mother lacked day 1 parenting skills. How old was your mother when she birthed you?

[Rick James]

Brainwashing>Spanking.

I agree with your post.

But your profile picture is rather disrespectful. Actually a tasteless creation.

[TheReal Kendall]

You know why you still did things after she told you not too? Because your mother lacked day 1 parenting skills. How old was your mother when she birthed you?

I didn't cause I wasn't listening.

I started listening and obeying when she put that fire to my fire.

Look at all these spoiled rich kids out here doing dumb shit, if they wouldn't gotten a whooping instead of going to time out they wouldn't be doing dumb shit.


Why in the hell do you have Hitler as you avy??????? :biggums:

[Rick James]

I didn't cause I wasn't listening.

I started listening and obeying when she put that fire to my fire.

Look at all these spoiled rich kids out here doing dumb shit, if they wouldn't gotten a whooping instead of going to time out they wouldn't be doing dumb shit.


Why in the hell do you have Hitler as you avy??????? :biggums:

Spoiled rich kids? That's beta parenting. You can discipline your children while being stern with them during early age. If parents were like Bill Parcells (please excuse my spelling of his name but I'm not going to google.) Is while coaching then this world would be a better place. You can install fear without being physical and abusing your children.

Again, how old was your mom when she birthed you?



I have Hitler as my avi because he's gave tons of inspirational quotes and speeches that I agree with. No I do not agree with his killing of innocent people, or racism, just his approach to quality way of life during his quotes.

[TheReal Kendall]

Spoiled rich kids? That's beta parenting. You can discipline your children while being stern with them during early age. If parents were like Bill Parcells (please excuse my spelling of his name but I'm not going to google.) Is while coaching then this world would be a better place. You can install fear without being physical and abusing your children.

Again, how old was your mom when she birthed you?



I have Hitler as my avi because he's gave tons of inspirational quotes and speeches that I agree with. No I do not agree with his killing of innocent people, or racism, just his approach to quality way of life during his quotes.

:coleman:

Spanking your child doesn't mean you're abusing them.

I'm not answering that question because that have nothing to do with parenting or disciplining kids.

[Swaggin916]

I remember my dad used to grab my jaw when I would talk back to him... worked like a charm. Considering he is a very even keeled guy it took a lot for him to do it.

I think some amount of physical contact is necessary if the kids don't listen and it is a situation that needs to be defused right away... but I am in agreement that punishments like grounding, or having them do work, or something taken away is a better alternative. You don't even have to really react to them either... just let it be known that there are consequences for their actions. Another thing my Dad used to do is have long talks with me... I think breaking it down via conversation and letting everyone express themselves is very healthy and at the end of it I didn't even care that I got punished... I was ready to deal with it and move on.

[oh the horror]

nothing wrong with being disciplined .. people are confusing child abuse with disciplining


Clearly the ones that didn't get spanked lack the reading comprehension.


I keep seeing the word "beating" and I keep wondering why that is in the discussion.

[MadeFromDust]

whoop em good or they get spoiled like little brats