How to deal with friends who always want to hang out

[tmacattack33]

So i have a few friends that always want to hang-out. Even during the weekdays.

I have a full-time job now, and i just want to come home and relax by myself every day for a few hours and then go to bed.

What should i do?

And keep in mind i still want to be friends with these guys...they are good dudes...and plus, i like to go to bars and parties with them once a week (on the weekends) and try to get girls.

[Draz]

My first friend in college my freshmen year. An italian white kid name Mike. He was really cool, out going, etc. I was 18, he was 25. Guy did weed every single day, would just smoke it in his house, would be high all the time. Good guy, bad influence. Always wanted to hang out with me. I slowly stopped chilling and he would get upset. Guy was so upset he started playing the cut you off game, didn't hit me up anymore. Gave me some BS that I never want to chill.

No problems between us, but the friendship got too close. He liked me because I was one of his loyal friends, good influence on him and was always giving him great advice. When I wasn't there he would be upset. It's like I'm a boyfriend or some shit. Had to end that shit.

It's simple. You can't be too friendly.

[Budadiiii]

How have you been dealing with it so far?

[ace23]

Sussest thread of the year so far. This should be good.

[Levity]

I feel ya. now that i work full time, with a few OT hours every week, the only thing that appeals to me by the time i get home is relaxing by myself or with my girlfriend. not all, but a few of my friends, including my roommate, are still time fighting by trying to relive their college days of going out to bars pretty much every night or hanging out at a buddies house. The idea of alone time seems foreign and unheard of to them

and like i said, im over doing all that stuff, couple that with the fact i get stoned every night when im home, i really dont want to do anything on work nights. My best advice to you is do what you want. Theyll get over it, unless they have some dire need to have to be around people all the time. Sometimes you just gotta do stuff for yourself, or you can truly stress yourself out. Its not like youre dating them, so theyll just have to accept the fact your taking some time to do you.

[cos88]

same problem for me. guys without hobbys that can't stay at home that only work, drink beer and sleep.


i go out 2 times a week, once during the week and once saturday.


try the following:


don't have money
i have a cold
i'm too tired
i'm going to my mum/father/grandma
tommorow i have to get up at 5:00
:bowdown:

[B-hoop]

Yea same thing happened to me. In my experience saying you are too tired because of work and you have to wake up early tomorrow is a good strategy, as long as you are available on weekends. (You should be since they are nice friends and all..)

[flipogb]

yo guys play any video games, you can just play online or something. hang out at the GTA V strip club, lol

[LJJ]

So i have a few friends that always want to hang-out. Even during the weekdays.

I have a full-time job now, and i just want to come home and relax by myself every day for a few hours and then go to bed.

What should i do?

And keep in mind i still want to be friends with these guys...they are good dudes...and plus, i like to go to bars and parties with them once a week (on the weekends) and try to get girls.

How about you tell them this:

"I have a full-time job now, and i just want to come home and relax by myself every day for a few hours and then go to bed.

Keep in mind i still want to be friends with you guys...yall are good dudes...and plus, i like to go to bars and parties with you once a week (on the weekends) and try to get girls."





What's the matter with you? Have you been taking estrogen tablets? Just tell them straight up.

[TheReal Kendall]

Same problem but my friends wanna go out every weekend.

I get tired of the same shit and I got a son now too. So I just use him as an excuse

[miller-time]

What's the matter with you? Have you been taking estrogen tablets? Just tell them straight up.

The problem is that a lot of people are really dependent on other people. He probably has told them straight up but when you don't give them an excuse they will keep pestering you. He wants to maintain the friendship while keeping his own space.

I'm in the same situation with a couple of mates. Whats worse is they don't like each either too. So I am going out twice as much as I want to lol.

[Bano114]

So i have a few friends that always want to hang-out. Even during the weekdays.

I have a full-time job now, and i just want to come home and relax by myself every day for a few hours and then go to bed.

What should i do?

And keep in mind i still want to be friends with these guys...they are good dudes...and plus, i like to go to bars and parties with them once a week (on the weekends) and try to get girls.

If that's how you really feel, than be straight up with them. Tell them you're getting busier and you won't be around as much. Let them know you still want to chill with them as much as you can, but if you need an excuse...how are these dudes your friends?

[Fresh Kid]

just let them know that things have changed for tha better for u and you will be busy most of tha time and if they cant understand or dont want to take it then forget them and move on bro. Good luck.

[CeltsGarlic]

Damn this make me appreciate my friends, who just take "no, Im tired" for an answer.

This almost sounds like GF situations.

[cuad]

GOBB is conspicuously absent from this thread.

[highwhey]

same problem for me. guys without hobbys that can't stay at home that only work, drink beer and sleep.


i go out 2 times a week, once during the week and once saturday.


try the following:


don't have money
i have a cold
i'm too tired
i'm going to my mum/father/grandma
tommorow i have to get up at 5:00
:bowdown:
thats my go to excuse, " i have ti wake up early for work tomorrow"

i do have ine friend who will pester the sh1t out of me, i could tell that dude that my grandma is dying at hospitla and i gotta visit her and he'll keep persisting :facepalm :facepalm

[I<3NBA]

just tell them you're tired and if they want to go out, you only have weekends available.

[Balla_Status]

Cant muster up the energy to at least meet them up for a couple beers or dinner?

I have a full time job as well but I try not to just waste my weeknights doing nothing.

[Breezy]

Offer to take your friendship "to the next level". that outta make em leave you alone.

[tmacattack33]

How about you tell them this:

"I have a full-time job now, and i just want to come home and relax by myself every day for a few hours and then go to bed.

Keep in mind i still want to be friends with you guys...yall are good dudes...and plus, i like to go to bars and parties with you once a week (on the weekends) and try to get girls."





What's the matter with you? Have you been taking estrogen tablets? Just tell them straight up.

The problem is both of them have jobs too. They're answer to me saying that I just want to relax at home and then go to bed and get a good night's sleep is "come on bro, don't be a b*tch, i got work in the morning too".

[tmacattack33]

Offer to take your friendship "to the next level". that outta make em leave you alone.

:oldlol:

[Jailblazers7]

Just realize that it is ok to say no whenever you want. They should respect your priorities if they are your friends. But at the same time, don't fall into the trap of being in the routine of just going between work and home every day during the week. You are in your 20s after all so you should spend some time in social situations even during the week. Just realize that you have to call it quits and head home earlier than you normally would because of your job.

[sundizz]

Just realize that it is ok to say no whenever you want. They should respect your priorities if they are your friends. But at the same time, don't fall into the trap of being in the routine of just going between work and home every day during the week. You are in your 20s after all so you should spend some time in social situations even during the week. Just realize that you have to call it quits and head home earlier than you normally would because of your job.

Yeah, this sounds like more of your problem OP.

A) You are a ***** and can't communicate with people you call your friends. You really can't just say I'm tired after work and don't really wanna trek to chill. If you lived with them and shut the door to your room and didn't talk to them that's one thing...but if you guys live different places it is kind of odd that you would kick it with them during the week that much. Seems like none of you are dating anyone.

B) You shouldn't be tired after work every single day. It's hard when you don't condition yourself to actually do stuff during the week...but work on it. Why don't you set up like one day a week where you guys hang out. Even like schedule a time where you guys stay at your respective houses and play a video game. I play Fun Run against my friends like 3x a week for 30 minutes. We play fantasy sports together. It's about as much communication as can be expected when people work. You get all your hanging out in during vaca's as an adult.

C) Stop being such a pansy. You make me feel sick that you are a man.

[OhNoTimNoSho]

if your friends are anything like my friends, no matter what you say or do, they are gonna get their sensitive ass feelings hurt. So might as well tell them straight up and expect them to be pissed at you for a while. Theyll get over it.

[Thorpesaurous]

Being grown sucks. It always has. But it's not like these are guys you want to cut off, and if you keep saying no, eventually they'll stop asking, which you don't want either. So a tip I'll give is to set something up, once a month, that's not an impossible thing to swing on weeknight. Say first Thursday of every month. Thursday's are easy, cause you can always muscle through a Friday. Do something easy. Go to the movies. Play a poker game. But be consistent. Do it every month same first Thursday, and then you'll adjust to it too. You can anticipate it and not have to shut it down because shit didn't go great at work that particular day.

Life sucks, and you kind of have to make time for things if you really want them to be a part of who you are as you get older.