Do you lose respect for friends who have shit girlfriends?

[Nick Young]

Do you lose respect for friends who have shit girlfriends and let those girlfriends treat them like trash?

I had a friend I met at university I used to have a lot of respect for. He worked really hard and was really ambitious. Then he got this shit girlfriend. She is a 5 in the looks scale and a Christian and a virgin. They've been dating 2 years and she's still a virgin. This friend was always a hardcore atheist making fun of religious people but now she has him waking up at 7 and going to church every Sunday. And he still hasn't gotten any. This girl is always putting him down and checking his internet history and threatening to break up with him cus she finds porn. She even tells him all the time she thinks sex is disgusting and doesn't believe in birth control. His only chance is to marry this horrible 5, and have sex with her one time.


Dude used to be cool to party with, now he is a complete bitch with zero self esteem who gives up at the smallest obstacle. This transformation from ambitious hardworker party dude to broken bitch happened in 2 years. The thing is I don't get it, she is a 5 and looks 15 years old max and dresses like a pilgrim. This dude's last girlfriend was a hotty and not a bitch. I have completely lost all respect for this guy. I can't even hang out with him now cus he's always bringing this bitch up, or saying he's not allowed to do stuff cus his bitch will get mad at him. It is too depressing to be around this dude now.

Do you lose respect for friends who have shitty girlfriends?

[RoseCity07]

One of my best friends married a b*tch that has 2 or 3 kids with another guy. They even broke up once and she s*cked her ex-husbands dick during that "break". I remember he called me to tell me how she called the cops on him to make him leave. He still went back to her and they ended up getting married.

I lost respect for him. Especially because I know he could get way better than her. This girl is like a 5 out of 10. He is definitly her bitch. I rarely talk to the dude except when I'm on break from school. I don't got the same respect anymore even though he's a good friend.

[1987_Lakers]

One of my closest friends is in a relationship with a total bitch at the moment. She isolates him from his friends AND family, he still hangs out with us when his girl isn't around sometimes, but the dude is clearly whipped, she makes the financial decisions, she manipulates his thoughts etc etc. It sucks but what are you gonna do, at the end of the day you are gonna have to let them go their own road. I still respect and care for the guy.

EDIT: I can tell he wants to hang out with us more, when I tell him crazy stories that happened to me over the weekend he wishes he was there with us. One of the reasons why I still respect him is because he still looks at his friends as family and he is still fun to party with on the rare occasion I see him.

[Nick Young]

I don't get what could drive a guy in to being so desperate the sacrifice their life for the name of a crappy girl who treats them as shit. I understand if they gave all their time and their life to a quality girl who treats them good and has things going for her.

But I don't understand why someone would dedicate their life to a shit girl who controls and abuses them. Why would anyone want that:facepalm .

[christian1923]

I don't get what could drive a guy in to being so desperate the sacrifice their life for the name of a crappy girl who treats them as shit. I understand if they gave all their time and their life to a quality girl who treats them good and has things going for her.

But I don't understand why someone would dedicate their life to a shit girl who controls and abuses them. Why would anyone want that:facepalm .
People are scared to be single again. They just settle.

[BigBoss]

I lost respect for friends who cheat on their girlfriends.

[Cactus-Sack]

Yes.

[stalkerforlife]

I don't have real life friends and if I did, I wouldn't concern myself with their significant others.

[joe]

I had a friend who was paying his girls way through college, while also paying for their apartment while he worked 5 days a week on the road. One night he spent a bunch of money to organize a camp out with his girlfriend and all of his friends. He bought all sorts of liquor, cigarettes, and food for the night. Once we got there, his girlfriend got mad about something and asked for them to step aside and ''talk.'' We then hear them screaming at each other, and suddenly they both left. Neither said good bye. He didn't take back any of the stuff he bought. Just up and left abruptly.

Later, we found out that she started punching him in the face and screaming at him. This girl always tried to drive him away from his friends, including me, and never liked him having a social life outside of her. He was basically a ghost for all the time they were dating.

Did I lose ''respect'' for him? Not really, it is just confusing to me. I don't get why people would stay in that type of relationship. It seems like it would make life unbearably miserable. Is sex really that great? I do love sex, but it is not worth all the other things you lose with that type of relationship. Is companionship great? Yeah, but that is not really companionship, in my opinion.

[RidonKs]

yes definitely. or i wouldn't say i lose respect for them, but i do learn something about them and i don't like what i learn.

let me ask you a question in return : when you lose respect for somebody, do you treat them differently? apart from actually confronting them on the fact that their girlfriend is an annoying bitter confrontational waste of space?

[RidonKs]

I don't get what could drive a guy in to being so desperate the sacrifice their life for the name of a crappy girl who treats them as shit. I understand if they gave all their time and their life to a quality girl who treats them good and has things going for her.

But I don't understand why someone would dedicate their life to a shit girl who controls and abuses them. Why would anyone want that:facepalm .
let's ask nick young another question: have you ever had trouble getting girls yourself?

because if you haven't, it makes perfect sense why you can't understand why a guy might settle. he's got someone. sometimes we settle for looks and get a bright aware sincere girl. other times we settle for character and wind up with a 10 who's full of it 100% of the time. either way, the guys who are settling are the ones who couldn't find somebody better. and it's the same the other way around.

maybe you want to dispute the fact that lots of guys have a hard time dating. i dunno tho, that'd be tough to argue lol

and we know precisely which girls have the hardest time dating. it's the ugly ones. the reason you're imagining a stereotypical b!tch who treats her bf like shit is because the culture of the western male is to chase the sexy-but-dumb-as-a-doorknob girl as opposed to the brilliant-but-build-like-a-tree-stump girl. that's indisputable and the proof is right in the pudding you're whining about. feel free to whine but understand a) why you can't understand and b) why you're whining in the first place

[ace23]

Lol you've posted about that dude before Nick. Did you ever post pics of the chick? Don't remember.

[RidonKs]

Lol you've posted about that dude before Nick. Did you ever post pics of the chick? Don't remember.
u should find the thread

[niko]

How could you not?

[ILLsmak]

yes definitely. or i wouldn't say i lose respect for them, but i do learn something about them and i don't like what i learn.

let me ask you a question in return : when you lose respect for somebody, do you treat them differently? apart from actually confronting them on the fact that their girlfriend is an annoying bitter confrontational waste of space?

It depends on what the relationship was like. Or what shit means. IF she's a bitch, nah. If she's manipulative, maybe. If she is cheating on him, yeah.

If I saw a girl start punching a guy I dunno if I'd lose respect for him. I'd be like damn that girl crazy. Generally, you're not gonna see what a relationship is like, as a friend. Unless you are crazy good at reading social undertones and willing to keep observing.

-Smak

[GimmeThat]

I think closet homosexuals should stop saying they lost respect for their straight friend because of a girl.

just say "I don't want to be friends with that guy anymore after seeing how he reacts to life scenarios"


because, you're gonna be friends with that guy now just because he switched a different b*tch?

[Nick Young]

yes definitely. or i wouldn't say i lose respect for them, but i do learn something about them and i don't like what i learn.

let me ask you a question in return : when you lose respect for somebody, do you treat them differently? apart from actually confronting them on the fact that their girlfriend is an annoying bitter confrontational waste of space?
I definitely stop hanging out with them as much because their company and presence is depressing to experience and drags me down too-because I knew them when they were cool and now I just see them as a broken bitch.

If the girl is a supreme hotty and has good sex with the dude, then I give more leeway to friends compared to ones who sacrifice their lives in the name of an average 5 virgin who gives zero sex, like the girl my friend in the OP is seeing.

[masonanddixon]

Most men are spineless and will allow the woman to walk all over him.

[GimmeThat]

Most men are spineless and will allow the woman to walk all over him.


until he's no longer there

[masonanddixon]

until he's no longer there

Very few men will walk out though.

I'm not sure what it is, but the 2014 man has become totally pusssified. Until we all preach the mentality that the woman is lucky to have you and isn't good enough for you, women will always hold the power.

[GimmeThat]

Very few men will walk out though.

I'm not sure what it is, but the 2014 man has become totally pusssified. Until we all preach the mentality that the woman is lucky to have you and isn't good enough for you, women will always hold the power.


more like while there's certainly the possibility of better counter parts out there. here's the power to disprove such myth.

[senelcoolidge]

Love does strange things. It would be worse if she were cheating on him and he stayed with her..I'd totally lose respect in that case. If she is just a bitch, that's their personal business. He can still be my friend.

[GimmeThat]

Love does strange things. It would be worse if she were cheating on him and he stayed with her..I'd totally lose respect in that case. If she is just a bitch, that's their personal business. He can still be my friend.

they'll just most likely end up being swingers


some people consider that an exclusive relationship



unless he really doesn't care
I'd probably warn her of the possibility that she is sleeping with a serial killer though

[code green]

I'm glad this thread is steering towards the personality faults, not the physical ones. One of my friends in particular is dating a chick that isn't exactly a 10, but she's an absolute sweetheart. Some of our friends give him shit for it, but they're the same ones with histories of dating absolute ***** with below average IQs.

To answer the question, I think "losing respect" is a bit harsh, even for the bitchiest of bitches. Most likely, the dudes have self-esteem issues that are causing them to deal with it, and as a self-admitted former ugly kid, I get it. I really don't think I have any friends who is dating someone I can't stand, ATM. A few years back, a friend of mine got into some pretty serious drug use because of his girl and ended up not waking up one morning because of it, and it affected our group of friends as to the type of women we bring into our lives. Hopefully at my age (27), we're all starting to mature a little bit more too. Including females.

[step_back]

I don't get what could drive a guy in to being so desperate the sacrifice their life for the name of a crappy girl who treats them as shit. I understand if they gave all their time and their life to a quality girl who treats them good and has things going for her.

But I don't understand why someone would dedicate their life to a shit girl who controls and abuses them. Why would anyone want that:facepalm .

It's called low self esteem and in all honesty it's because they're a weak individual. That being said I think some of my friends that go from relationship to relationship are also weak minded. I have a friend who goes from long term relationship to long term relationship. He spent 5 years with one girl who he wasn't even attracted to.

Part of being an alpha male in my eyes is not relying on others to make you happy or secure. Be your own man.

[ImKobe]

I don't lose respect for them, but I've had some issues with it and have fought (not physically) over this type of ish, where I'm trying to talk some sense into my buddies. I've been right in the long run and their relationships have failed eventually because of those issues.

Had some shit gfs myself, but you learn from it. You just have to be able to tell your gf when enough is enough. You shouldn't be taking bs from no one, even if you gettin ***** from them.

You can tell your bud has a shitty gf if you can't even get along with her or she's putting your bud down in front of others. I can't respect a man, who has no control over his woman.

[Pushxx]

Short answer: yes.

If you want to help, you have to use reverse psychology when giving advice. Also, try to help them hit rock bottom. If you bust your whipped friend's balls, it's going to downplay the severity of his situation and it becomes a joke.

They have to make the mistakes and learn from them.

[Quizno]

one of my best friends used to kick it all the time. we have a small group of friends and we'd chill a lot of evenings, drink, smoke, etc. or do whatever. but he got a girlfriend and now he has "designated" hang out days with his girl....thursday, friday, saturday, AND sunday lmao. he's also not free tuesday so the only nights he can kick it are monday and wednesday, which works for basically nobody because we all go to school and work

so yeah, he's sacrificed all his friendships just to hang out with some girl thursday - sunday. pretty lame

[Pushxx]

one of my best friends used to kick it all the time. we have a small group of friends and we'd chill a lot of evenings, drink, smoke, etc. or do whatever. but he got a girlfriend and now he has "designated" hang out days with his girl....thursday, friday, saturday, AND sunday lmao. he's also not free tuesday so the only nights he can kick it are monday and wednesday, which works for basically nobody because we all go to school and work

so yeah, he's sacrificed all his friendships just to hang out with some girl thursday - sunday. pretty lame

That sucks. One of my best friends had to stop seeing all his friends after he got engaged. His fiance didn't let him hang out with his friends at all. He just went dark for a year until they got divorced.

[Quizno]

That sucks. One of my best friends had to stop seeing all his friends after he got engaged. His fiance didn't let him hang out with his friends at all. He just went dark for a year until they got divorced.
what i really wonder is what the **** is going through a guy's head to think that that's okay. luckily girls i've been with haven't been control freaks but if a girl told me not to hang out with my friends anymore i'd laugh in her face and tell her to find someone else

[Smoke117]

I don't have real life friends and if I did, I wouldn't concern myself with their significant others.

;(

[BlackWhiteGreen]

It's a difficult one. Personally I can't stand almost any of my friends' girlfriends, but that's their business - obviously they can. There's a couple of exceptions where I have wound up cutting a dude out because I can't handle what his girlfriend is like. But really in both those cases it just displayed to me the worst characteristics in those guys I already knew about them - one was just a plain idiot who had some really bad violent tendencies which were just exacerbated by his infuriating gf. They were doing all sorts of disgusting shit (literally, defecating on one another) in public area of our house and it just showed he had no respect for us.

But yeah the bird was ****ing batshit insane, literally the worst person I've ever met. Not fair to judge her but a 2 a best as well

[Balla_Status]

I got a bit annoyed at my buddy's gf who's getting married in February. She's a bitch and I even started a thread about it on here when they got engaged.

rufuspaul gave some great advice. Something along the lines of don't worry about other people, people are gonna do what they gonna do. Focus on yourself.

So I'm a groomsman in the wedding and I'm going to go. Get drunk and have a good time. Who gives a **** in the end...nothing I can really do about it.

[Derka]

I don't lose respect because who knows why people do what they do? It sucks, but people are their own masters and they have to make their own mistakes in life...especially in matters of love and sex.

I'm pretty lucky in that I've become pretty good friends with the current girlfriends of my two best friends. The three of us have been friends-bros for almost 20 years now, so we understand the balance our collective friendship requires at this stage: their women get the majority of the attention and we get together if and when schedules allow while staying in touch thanks to the marvels of technology. To their unending credit, both of them understand that three of us see each other as family, ergo if you really want to be with one of us...you'd better be ready to become a part of said family. They both do, which is terrific for all involved.

The only thing both of these ladies do that bothers me: they both try to set me up with their friends. I can't stand that and am perfectly happy with chasing the occasional tail in perpetual bachelorhood.

[cuad]

I don't have any friends doe.

[Jailblazers7]

That sucks. One of my best friends had to stop seeing all his friends after he got engaged. His fiance didn't let him hang out with his friends at all. He just went dark for a year until they got divorced.

Nobody could have seen that coming. :oldlol:

The way I see it is that if a girl doesn't make an effort to get to know and like your friends, then she really isn't interested long term. And vice versa of course.

[GimmeThat]

Short answer: yes.

If you want to help, you have to use reverse psychology when giving advice. Also, try to help them hit rock bottom. If you bust your whipped friend's balls, it's going to downplay the severity of his situation and it becomes a joke.

They have to make the mistakes and learn from them.


I lose respect for friends who gets into a relationship and then becomes worse of a person than before.

I can give a f*ck about who he hangs out with

[JEFFERSON MONEY]

I flat out refuse to associate with that kind of guy. And you're right Nick. It's a show of weak character, immaturity, and in essence allowing your sexual needs to override and enslave your personal will to freedom/happiness.

A very very debilitating trait.

Lost a former roommate to that kind of chick.

And you know the saying like attracts like right?

I've had the blessing of having non-needy non-controlling non-parasitcal women come into my life. It truly is a sweet sensation and good luck on all you guys as well