Realtor Ettiquette

[hateraid]

I recently found out my buddy bought a home. When we got to talking about it he mentioned it was my cousin who sold it to him. I figured wow, that is a great coincidence. So I asked how he got to know my cousin was a realtor and how he got his contact. He says thst my cousin contacted him out of the blue via Facebook,
It turns out my cousin had been purging clients by going through my Facebook and using our relationship as a means to gain clients and gain their trust. Here is the catch. I had no idea nor was I ever informed he was doing this!? Not only that, I've followed up and several of my friends mentioned they have been contacted.
So my question is, is this common realtor practice? Should I get offended? Should I asked for a finders fee since he's using my relationship as resources to make him money?
How should I approach this?

[triangleoffense]

I recently found out my buddy bought a home. When we got to talking about it he mentioned it was my cousin who sold it to him. I figured wow, that is a great coincident. So I asked how he got to know my cousin was a realtor and how he got his contact. He says thst my cousin contacted him out of the blue via Facebook,
It turns out my cousin had been purging clients by going through my Facebook and using our relationship as a means to gain clients and gain their trust. Here is the catch. I had no idea nor was I ever informed he was doing this!? Not only that, I've followed up and several of my friends mentioned they have been contacted.
So my question is, is this common realtor practice? Should I get offended? Should I asked for a finders fee since he's using my relationship as resources to make him money?
How should I approach this?
I'm not really sure you should get offended but i'm not a lawyer nor anywhere close to an expert on the subject. If you are concerned about what fiduciary obligations he may be entitled to give to you you could consult with a lawyer that specializes in realty/business law?

What it really sounds like is that he has good networking skills and is simply using his relationship with you as a gateway to new clients, a practice which may or may not be common in your domain of practice. I don't know the character of your cousin however so I assume the best advice is to confront him about it in a polite way so as to understand his true intentions.

There is also the question and concept of "professional courtesy" and if and how that would apply to your situation. I know that every job I've had I've gained through either family or friendship relations so that is an issue that arises as well, as to where the line is drawn between simply networking or manipulating/dishonestly gaining clients by misleading statements.

[kNIOKAS]

I'm not really sure you should get offended but i'm not a lawyer nor anywhere close to an expert on the subject. If you are concerned about what fiduciary obligations he may be entitled to give to you you could consult with a lawyer that specializes in realty/business law?

What it really sounds like is that he has no manners and is simply using his relationship with you as a gateway to new clients, a practice which may or may not be common in your domain of practice. I don't know the character of your cousin however so I assume the best advice is to confront him about it in a polite way so as to understand his true intentions.

There is also the question and concept of "professional courtesy" and if and how that would apply to your situation. I know that every job I've had I've gained through either family or friendship relations so that is an issue that arises as well, as to where the line is drawn between simply networking or manipulating/dishonestly gaining clients by misleading statements.
fixed

[hateraid]

I'm not really sure you should get offended but i'm not a lawyer nor anywhere close to an expert on the subject. If you are concerned about what fiduciary obligations he may be entitled to give to you you could consult with a lawyer that specializes in realty/business law?

What it really sounds like is that he has good networking skills and is simply using his relationship with you as a gateway to new clients, a practice which may or may not be common in your domain of practice. I don't know the character of your cousin however so I assume the best advice is to confront him about it in a polite way so as to understand his true intentions.

There is also the question and concept of "professional courtesy" and if and how that would apply to your situation. I know that every job I've had I've gained through either family or friendship relations so that is an issue that arises as well, as to where the line is drawn between simply networking or manipulating/dishonestly gaining clients by misleading statements.
Im not looking for any legal action nor do I feel I'm entitled to get paid. I just felt that I could have been consulted that he was doing this. I would more than willing to do referrals for free.

[9erempiree]

Im not looking for any legal action nor do I feel I'm entitled to get paid. I just felt that I could have been consulted that he was doing this. I would more than willing to do referrals for free.

You did ask whether you should get a referral's fee.

Yes, it is common practice for realtors to do this. This is no different than sending flyers out. In this instance there is a face to a name since it's from Facebook.

[hateraid]

You did ask whether you should get a referral's fee.

Yes, it is common practice for realtors to do this. This is no different than sending flyers out. In this instance there is a face to a name since it's from Facebook.
My mom actually suggested it since my cousin was making money off my name.
Personally id do it for free.
As for using my name to gain trust, that is where I have an issue. The guy who actually bought the house was known to not be a very financially sound guy. I felt using my name manipulated the situation.
I admit it is fairly savy and opportunistic

[LJJ]

All realtors are snakes when it comes to their jobs.

I wouldn't be cool with this. If you think this kind of thing is fine, you should also be fine with friends of your friends creeping on your facebook and messaging you about buying Cutco knives or becoming a Jehovah's Witness. It's annoying.

[9erempiree]

All realtors are snakes when it comes to their jobs.

I wouldn't be cool with this. If you think this kind of thing is fine, you should also be fine with friends of your friends creeping on your facebook and messaging you about buying Cutco knives or becoming a Jehovah's Witness. It's annoying.

Nothing alike. You act like its easy to hustle people into buying a house. Nobody gets conned into buying a home compared to what you mentioned above.

[embersyc]

What you described in OP is entirely the premise of social networking.

[9erempiree]

What you described in OP is entirely the premise of social networking.

Yea, OP's cousin basically used the networking part of social networking. I have to applaud him for doing so.

[GimmeThat]

there may be a difference between utilizing demographic, then possible manufactured/artificial. Trust.

[DCL]

i'm actually impressed he was able to make bread like this. you didn't get a cut so of course you feeling kinda mad. but that's his game, and he went out of his way to get shit done. if he's your cousin, you should be proud of his ass. he's family, right?

[triangleoffense]

Im not looking for any legal action nor do I feel I'm entitled to get paid. I just felt that I could have been consulted that he was doing this. I would more than willing to do referrals for free.
I hear you, i would prob feel the same way and would at least expect a new christmas present from him this year :oldlol:

[GimmeThat]

All realtors are snakes when it comes to their jobs.

I wouldn't be cool with this. If you think this kind of thing is fine, you should also be fine with friends of your friends creeping on your facebook and messaging you about buying Cutco knives or becoming a Jehovah's Witness. It's annoying.



I'd probably say that they are snakes against their competition if anything else.



as for friends of your friends creeping up on you?

are you possibility talking about utilizing the *dick* card

[hateraid]

I'd probably say that they are snakes against their competition if anything else.



as for friends of your friends creeping up on you?

are you possibility talking about utilizing the *dick* card
Moreso if you're gonna sell stuff to my friends and using my name, I think it's common courtesy to let me know about. It was all done behind my back

[GimmeThat]

Moreso if you're gonna sell stuff to my friends and using my name, I think it's common courtesy to let me know about. It was all done behind my back


This reminds me of the time someone made a thread about black people having the worst attitude

[hateraid]

Yea, OP's cousin basically used the networking part of social networking. I have to applaud him for doing so.

So what's the difference from a business using your e-mail to sell to other businesses?
Or let's say ISH had an app but in order to sign up you had to go through Facebook. Then Jeff goes and posts ads on their pages? Seems all the same

[DeuceWallaces]

Dude is doing work. That's what sales and networking is.

Facebook does not seem like a healthy place for you.

[embersyc]

So what's the difference from a business using your e-mail to sell to other businesses?
Or let's say ISH had an app but in order to sign up you had to go through Facebook. Then Jeff goes and posts ads on their pages? Seems all the same


It's not the same, sending unsolicited mass email is illegal.

Networking is the entire point of a site like Facebook. Well that and selling all your personal information to whoever is willing to pay for it.

[Jailblazers7]

Depends on your cousin honestly. If he is a good guy and ethical in his work, then I wouldn't be too bothered by it. Otherwise I would be furious because, if he is using you as a link to gain the trust of customers, it could blow up and impact your personal life and relationships.

I would definitely bring it up to him and let him know that you need a heads up if he is going to network within your circle of friends. Not that he really needs your permission but it is a courtesy that he should extend to you as a friend/family member.

[hateraid]

Depends on your cousin honestly. If he is a good guy and ethical in his work, then I wouldn't be too bothered by it. Otherwise I would be furious because, if he is using you as a link to gain the trust of customers, it could blow up and impact your personal life and relationships.

I would definitely bring it up to him and let him know that you need a heads up if he is going to network within your circle of friend. Not that he really needs your permission but it is a courtesy that he should extend to you as a friend/family member.

Thank you JB7 for actually relating to how i feel. I will always support a family/friend in their pursuit of success. I just thought it is common courtesy to at least give me a heads up? Like if were to say, "hey, I'm thinking of selling houses to your friends, can you vouch for me?"
That's the least I'd expect. I don't see how I'm taking this as an unhealthy experience :confusedshrug:

[Done_And_Done]

Thank you JB7 for actually relating to how i feel. I will always support a family/friend in their pursuit of success. I just thought it is common courtesy to at least give me a heads up? Like if were to say, "hey, I'm thinking of selling houses to your friends, can you vouch for me?"
That's the least I'd expect. I don't see how I'm taking this as an unhealthy experience :confusedshrug:

I completely agree with you and Blazers. The guy is sifting through your contact list and capitalizing on your positive reputation. I would never knock the hustle, let alone impede a family member in their pursuit of success, but I believe a simple courtesy call isn't too much to ask for here. He's going out of his way to touch base with your friends because he knows you've forged healthy relationships with these people. It's complimentary in an underhanded sorta of way but I feel he still should have notified you, especially if he incorporated your name into his pitch.

[dunksby]

He is taking advantage of your reputation to gain trust of your friends so that could fall under fraud category? If your cousin pushes a bitter deal through with your friends, you are gonna be in at least for a hell of a drama.