Conflict in a relationship

[UK2K]

How do you all deal with it? I don't mean when you're simply 'courting', but when you live together, when you're married.

I've been with my girlfriend ~3 years, and we've only ever had one legit fight. People tell me that's not normal, but it works for us.

But I watch movies where these couples seem to always fight, or one particular case of a girl here at work who constantly argues with her husband on the phone, in the office.

So how do you do it when you live together, and have nowhere to go? I guess you can go to a bar, but you still have to sleep in the same bed? I've always told my girlfriend I have been against marriage since as long as I can remember, and wasn't sure if I would ever marry. Just seems like a big hassle.

What say you? Words of wisdom from the old timers?

[Draz]

My ex and I would get physical. Fights every fcking day or day after. She had a rotten attitude. For three years of my life. You're fine.

[UK2K]

My ex and I would get physical. Fights every fcking day or day after. She had a rotten attitude. For three years of my life. You're fine.

Lol no I'm not in a conflict right now.

The more I look at the idea of marriage, it just seems the less and less I want to go through with it.

[~primetime~]

If you live with someone for years you are going to fight every now and then, and I feel like it can even be healthy. Sometimes you just have to let out some steam, get things off your chest, etc.

I've lived with three separate women. One for five years, one for three, my current wife I've lived with for around four years now. When I was drinking the fights were not healthy fights, alcohol creates tons of regret. But me and my current wife dont drink, so our fights don't go to those bad places. We live in a large house and I do have spare rooms we can sleep in when we are at odds, I think that's only happened once though. Most of the time we just sleep in the same bed while pissed at each other. But we always make up, so it's all good.

I'll tell you this though, having kids can really increase stress and fighting, you lose sleep and lots of time for each other. But at the same time having kids really brings you together as well. It's a crazy ride.

[Mike Armstrong]

Lol no I'm not in a conflict right now.

The more I look at the idea of marriage, it just seems the less and less I want to go through with it.

Why you a little bitch though?

[UK2K]

If you live with someone for years you are going to fight every now and then, and I feel like it can even be healthy. Sometimes you just have to let out some steam, get things off your chest, etc.

I've lived with three separate women. One for five years, one for three, my current wife I've lived with for around four years now. When I was drinking the fights were not healthy fights, alcohol creates tons of regret. But me and my current wife dont drink, so our fights don't go to those bad places. We live in a large house and I do have spare rooms we can sleep in when we are at odds, I think that's only happened once though. Most of the time we just sleep in the same bed while pissed at each other. But we always make up, so it's all good.

I'll tell you this though, having kids can really increase stress and fighting, you lose sleep and lots of time for each other. But at the same time having kids really brings you together as well. It's a crazy ride.

That's another big issue I have with marriage. After that comes kids, and I'm not entirely sure I want kids either.

Maybe it's because I am such a good place now, that all that stuff doesn't appeal to me? Almost like, I am pretty ****ing happy now so why go for marriage or kids if I like where I'm at? I guess, if that makes sense.

The thought of kids seems awful to me.


Why you a little bitch though?

About marriage? :confusedshrug:

[~primetime~]

If you don't want to get married and have kids, then don't get married and have kids. No shame in that.

If you end up meeting a girl you fall in love with, you'll probably change your views though.

[Tarik One]

If you live with someone for years you are going to fight every now and then, and I feel like it can even be healthy. Sometimes you just have to let out some steam, get things off your chest, etc.

I've lived with three separate women. One for five years, one for three, my current wife I've lived with for around four years now. When I was drinking the fights were not healthy fights, alcohol creates tons of regret. But me and my current wife dont drink, so our fights don't go to those bad places. We live in a large house and I do have spare rooms we can sleep in when we are at odds, I think that's only happened once though. Most of the time we just sleep in the same bed while pissed at each other. But we always make up, so it's all good.

I'll tell you this though, having kids can really increase stress and fighting, you lose sleep and lots of time for each other. But at the same time having kids really brings you together as well. It's a crazy ride.
I concur with your observation. "Fights" are healthy. It's important that a man doesn't cower down to keep the peace or out of fear even.

Women will always test men

[Derka]

If you don't want to get married and have kids, then don't get married and have kids. No shame in that.

If you end up meeting a girl you fall in love with, you'll probably change your views though.

Exactly what happened to me right here and it was scary as shit when it started. I had almost no control over it...I look at her and my brain just starts acting of its own accord; just patterns and modes of thinking that I had never considered before suddenly made a f*cking ton of sense and I couldn't explain to you why that is if I had the damned script in front of me.

[nathanjizzle]

1 fight in 3 years of living together is not normal, one of you is holding back what you have to say, and when it comes out it will come out in the worst way. if she resents you for something and she doesnt argue with you about it, it will build up and build up untill shes reverse cowgirling some guy she met at the bar.

[highwhey]

That's good to hear OP. One would think that you and your sister would fight more often, especially when you consider the sq feet available in your trailer.

[Pushxx]

Exactly what happened to me right here and it was scary as shit when it started. I had almost no control over it...I look at her and my brain just starts acting of its own accord; just patterns and modes of thinking that I had never considered before suddenly made a f*cking ton of sense and I couldn't explain to you why that is if I had the damned script in front of me.

That's how it is. Society and instinct together has engrained that in us, even when we don't externally want that.


As for conflict: it depends on the girl. My ex-fianc

[knickballer]

If you don't want kids whats the purpose of getting married? To play house until you die/divorce?

[UK2K]

If you don't want kids whats the purpose of getting married? To play house until you die/divorce?

Well I'm at the point where marriage seems like the next logical step, since we've been dating almost three years. And we live together.

I'm kinda hoping that maybe by my early 30's I'll want kids? Or is that just wishful thinking?

[UK2K]

1 fight in 3 years of living together is not normal, one of you is holding back what you have to say, and when it comes out it will come out in the worst way. if she resents you for something and she doesnt argue with you about it, it will build up and build up untill shes reverse cowgirling some guy she met at the bar.
Well, if anyone is holding back, its me.

In real life, I'm fairly easy to get along with. To me arguing is kinda pointless because it doesn't really solve anything to yell and be mad. I take more of a 'it is what it is' approach to life.

For example, I'm not going to snoop through her phone because if she wanted to cheat on me, she would, and I think me trying to stop her from cheating doesn't fix anything if the desire is still there. Does that make sense?

She's easy to get along with as well. Loves football, plays fantasy, lets me do my own thing, never bitches about anything.

But I watch movies like 'this is 40' and think to myself, what the **** are y'all doing together?

[Alamо]

Well, if anyone is holding back, its me.

In real life, I'm fairly easy to get along with. To me arguing is kinda pointless because it doesn't really solve anything to yell and be mad. I take more of a 'it is what it is' approach to life.

For example, I'm not going to snoop through her phone because if she wanted to cheat on me, she would, and I think me trying to stop her from cheating doesn't fix anything if the desire is still there. Does that make sense?

She's easy to get along with as well. Loves football, plays fantasy, lets me do my own thing, never bitches about anything.

But I watch movies like 'this is 40' and think to myself, what the **** are y'all doing together?


yall sound hella boring