Polygraph Test

[enayes]

Anyone here taken a polygraph test before? I might be taking one soon for a 911 dispatcher position that I'm interested in. I'm worried about questions regarding theft/other crimes.

Overall I haven't done much; weed occasionally, shrooms once, stolen minor things when I was younger, etc.

[highwhey]

I can imagine most ISH'ers reactions undergoing a polygraph test when asked if they have alt accounts.

[Nanners]

didnt you steal stuff out of mailboxes?

also you stole some credit cards right?

its not like you were just jay-walking, these are significant crimes. the mailbox one is a federal crime and a felony.

[Velocirap31]

Just lie on every single question and then tell them you were really nervous, but were truthful.

[rufuspaul]

didnt you steal stuff out of mailboxes?

also you stole some credit cards right?

its not like you were just jay-walking, these are significant crimes. the mailbox one is a federal crime and a felony.


Jeez what a scumbag!

[gigantes]

you really want to be a 911 dispatcher?

from what i've read, you're going to hear things that you wish you could unremember until the end of your days.

doing customer service or tech support was fairly easy and not to stressful for me, by comparison.

[CavaliersFTW]

didnt you steal stuff out of mailboxes?

also you stole some credit cards right?

its not like you were just jay-walking, these are significant crimes. the mailbox one is a federal crime and a felony.
:lol oh shit Nanners making OP deathly afraid of the test

[Dresta]

OP:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s3yKbubvl3M

[UK2K]

Anyone here taken a polygraph test before? I might be taking one soon for a 911 dispatcher position that I'm interested in. I'm worried about questions regarding theft/other crimes.

Overall I haven't done much; weed occasionally, shrooms once, stolen minor things when I was younger, etc.
I lied on both mine, and passed both, each for a different police department.

Whatever you put on the application is the truth. That's what they'll ask you about. So, if you didn't lie on the application, you're good.

And FYI, if you did shit when you were younger, you're fine, unless you admitted you ever sold, even a dime bag to a friend. Then you're ****ed.

[CavaliersFTW]

yea man, some of the shit you hear can get to you.

this one chick I know is a dispatcher, I guess some lady called cause her husband was choking, and she didnt know cpr and the husband ended up dying in the ladies arms while she was on the phone with the dispatcher.
:(

[enayes]

I lied on both mine, and passed both, each for a different police department.

Whatever you put on the application is the truth. That's what they'll ask you about. So, if you didn't lie on the application, you're good.

And FYI, if you did shit when you were younger, you're fine, unless you admitted you ever sold, even a dime bag to a friend. Then you're ****ed.

Should I mention doing shrooms in college on my application? I'm not sure if it asks specifically but if they ask me "have you ever done an illegal drug besides weed?" I would have to say yes.

[enayes]

didnt you steal stuff out of mailboxes?

also you stole some credit cards right?

its not like you were just jay-walking, these are significant crimes. the mailbox one is a federal crime and a felony.

the mailbox thing was weird, I was walking along and got the urge to look inside a mailbox, which I did, and there just happens to be a women's wallet/purse sitting in there lol so I took it out, there was no cash but I took some gift cards but even those ended up being empty, i then put the purse back in the mailbox

i never "stole" a credit card, I found a guy's wallet and used a credit card to fill up my car and then tossed it, so not exactly stealing

[TomBrady]

the mailbox thing was weird, I was walking along and got the urge to look inside a mailbox, which I did, and there just happens to be a women's wallet/purse sitting in there lol so I took it out, there was no cash but I took some gift cards but even those ended up being empty, i then put the purse back in the mailbox

i never "stole" a credit card, I found a guy's wallet and used a credit card to fill up my car and then tossed it, so not exactly stealing
That is stealing.

[CavaliersFTW]

the mailbox thing was weird, I was walking along and got the urge to look inside a mailbox, which I did, and there just happens to be a women's wallet/purse sitting in there lol so I took it out, there was no cash but I took some gift cards but even those ended up being empty, i then put the purse back in the mailbox

i never "stole" a credit card, I found a guy's wallet and used a credit card to fill up my car and then tossed it, so not exactly stealing
yeah... that's stealing

You appear to feel no guilt or have no conscious about it either which is kind of messed up. You never felt like you shouldn't have done it? And I don't mean because other people would frown upon I mean like an inner conscious telling you this isn't good because this is going to trouble someone else. If I found someones wallet not only would it not even cross my mind to use his credit cards, but I'd actually try to return it to the person or give it to a store manager or someone of authority in the location I found it if there was no identifying information on the person who lost it.

[Draz]

Should I mention doing shrooms in college on my application? I'm not sure if it asks specifically but if they ask me "have you ever done an illegal drug besides weed?" I would have to say yes.
They don't care about drugs like weed or shrooms

[enayes]

yeah... that's stealing

You appear to feel no guilt or have no conscious about it either which is kind of messed up. You never felt like you shouldn't have done it? And I don't mean because other people would frown upon I mean like an inner conscious telling you this isn't good because this is going to trouble someone else.

I'm a big supporter of finder's keepers, or at least users.

I'm not going to try and steal something off a person or break into their home but if I find something I'm going to use it to benefit myself. I get a high from it and I don't feel bad because I'm not ruining anyone's lives by filling up my car or keeping an ipod.

[CavaliersFTW]

I'm a big supporter of finder's keepers, or at least users.

I'm not going to try and steal something off a person or break into their home but if I find something I'm going to use it to benefit myself. I get a high from it and I don't feel bad because I'm not ruining anyone's lives by filling up my car or keeping an ipod.
IE you're NOT a supporter of legal ownership and possession. You're a supporter of stealing.

You sure you should be working for the police? :biggums:

Yes, you are really doing damage to peoples lives. Most people would want the rightful owners to get their things back. And they would share the joy of the rightful owners getting it back because 9 times out of 10 the owner was missing the thing they lost and stressed the **** out about losing it. You're not the kind of guy that would return it and make them happy and grateful for you, you're the kind of guy that would willingly become a source of stress for them. You'd become a thief.

[Nanners]

the mailbox thing was weird, I was walking along and got the urge to look inside a mailbox, which I did, and there just happens to be a women's wallet/purse sitting in there lol so I took it out, there was no cash but I took some gift cards but even those ended up being empty, i then put the purse back in the mailbox

i never "stole" a credit card, I found a guy's wallet and used a credit card to fill up my car and then tossed it, so not exactly stealing

the mailbox story is just too bizzare to know how to respond, other than say you are an idiot

for the wallet thing thats definitely a crime and also just messed up.

[TomBrady]

"I'm a big supporter of taking something that isn't mine but it wasn't stealing."

[Draz]

the mailbox thing was weird, I was walking along and got the urge to look inside a mailbox, which I did, and there just happens to be a women's wallet/purse sitting in there lol so I took it out, there was no cash but I took some gift cards but even those ended up being empty, i then put the purse back in the mailbox

i never "stole" a credit card, I found a guy's wallet and used a credit card to fill up my car and then tossed it, so not exactly stealing
:roll:

[highwhey]

Ummm...

[CavaliersFTW]

At first I wanted you to not get caught about your past on the lie detector test because I figured you'd probably grown past juvenile things like stealing or whatever.

Now it's clear to me that you should with certainty be confronted about it during the lie detector test, you shouldn't be working for the police if to this day you think "finders keepers" is a real life thing with other peoples lost ipods and credit cards that's a mentality that's got to change before you can be responsible for helping people :roll:

[Nanners]

if the polygraph people decide to grill you on that mailbox thing you are gonna be ****ed for sure.

"well i got a sudden urge to look in a random mailbox, where i happened to find a random purse full of gift cards, which i took... but its cool cause they all ended up being empty"

[CavaliersFTW]

if the polygraph people decide to grill you on that mailbox thing you are gonna be ****ed for sure.

"well i got a sudden urge to look in a random mailbox, where i happened to find a random purse full of gift cards, which i took... but its cool cause they all ended up being empty"
And using someone else's credit card I'm pretty sure is identity theft.

OP has zero remorse about any of this. Finders keepers might be a catchy phrase, but it certainly isn't legal - or moral :lol

[UK2K]

Should I mention doing shrooms in college on my application? I'm not sure if it asks specifically but if they ask me "have you ever done an illegal drug besides weed?" I would have to say yes.
Yes. Admit to that.

You did it once for experimentation purposes, and didn't like it, so you didn't do it again. If it was more than a few years, I think 3, they'll let it slide.

[UK2K]

the mailbox thing was weird, I was walking along and got the urge to look inside a mailbox, which I did, and there just happens to be a women's wallet/purse sitting in there lol so I took it out, there was no cash but I took some gift cards but even those ended up being empty, i then put the purse back in the mailbox

i never "stole" a credit card, I found a guy's wallet and used a credit card to fill up my car and then tossed it, so not exactly stealing
May not want to mention that part.

[UK2K]

At first I wanted you to not get caught about your past on the lie detector test because I figured you'd probably grown past juvenile things like stealing or whatever.

Now it's clear to me that you should with certainty be confronted about it during the lie detector test, you shouldn't be working for the police if to this day you think "finders keepers" is a real life thing with other peoples lost ipods and credit cards that's a mentality that's got to change before you can be responsible for helping people :roll:
Lol feel the same way.

[oarabbus]

the mailbox thing was weird, I was walking along and got the urge to look inside a mailbox, which I did, and there just happens to be a women's wallet/purse sitting in there lol so I took it out, there was no cash but I took some gift cards but even those ended up being empty, i then put the purse back in the mailbox

i never "stole" a credit card, I found a guy's wallet and used a credit card to fill up my car and then tossed it, so not exactly stealing


I'm a big supporter of finder's keepers, or at least users.

I'm not going to try and steal something off a person or break into their home but if I find something I'm going to use it to benefit myself. I get a high from it and I don't feel bad because I'm not ruining anyone's lives by filling up my car or keeping an ipod.



:biggums:



That is stealing, and your moral compass is suspect

[HitandRun Reggie]

OP is kind of a scumbag. That polygraph needle is probably going to be jumping around more than Kat Williams on crack. I hope they don't hire this fool and depend on him to handle life and death emergencies.

http://insidehoops.com/forum/showthread.php?t=112685

http://www.insidehoops.com/forum/showthread.php?t=258963&page=2

[Patrick Chewing]

True story:

I applied years and years ago when I was in my early 20's for a Police Officer position in Miami.

I ****ed myself big time on the Polygraph test and would advise you to NOT LIE ABOUT ANYTHING. Prior to the test, we were given a written questionnaire (which I'm sure they gave you), where we had to answer all those questions like theft and drug use and all that. Being the nervous and dumb kid that I was, I lied about my marijuana use when I was in college. I wrote down that I had never done any type of drugs thinking that it would only help me to admit that. Well...duh if I was about to take a polygraph exam afterwards, then they're going to know I was lying!

Needless to say, when they asked me the question about drug use, I lied to them to match the answer I had written down before, and of course they caught me on it. So I was disqualified. Bottom line, DO NOT LIE. Admit what you've done in the past, and I guarantee you will have a better chance at obtaining the position. Some departments don't care about your past, they care about the person they have right in front of them today.


- PC

[Levity]

the mailbox thing was weird, I was walking along and got the urge to look inside a mailbox, which I did, and there just happens to be a women's wallet/purse sitting in there lol so I took it out, there was no cash but I took some gift cards but even those ended up being empty, i then put the purse back in the mailbox


haha thats like a 2016 version of seeing a pie cooling on a random windowsill and eating it.


the mailbox story is just too bizzare to know how to respond,
.
:lol

[oarabbus]

True story:

I applied years and years ago when I was in my early 20's for a Police Officer position in Miami.

I ****ed myself big time on the Polygraph test and would advise you to NOT LIE ABOUT ANYTHING. Prior to the test, we were given a written questionnaire (which I'm sure they gave you), where we had to answer all those questions like theft and drug use and all that. Being the nervous and dumb kid that I was, I lied about my marijuana use when I was in college. I wrote down that I had never done any type of drugs thinking that it would only help me to admit that. Well...duh if I was about to take a polygraph exam afterwards, then they're going to know I was lying!

Needless to say, when they asked me the question about drug use, I lied to them to match the answer I had written down before, and of course they caught me on it. So I was disqualified. Bottom line, DO NOT LIE. Admit what you've done in the past, and I guarantee you will have a better chance at obtaining the position. Some departments don't care about your past, they care about the person they have right in front of them today.


- PC


They're not gonna care he ate shrooms in college maybe, but they ARE going to care he committed theft and identity fraud... the latter is a felony.

[CavaliersFTW]

They're not gonna care he ate shrooms in college maybe, but they ARE going to care he committed theft and identity fraud... the latter is a felony.
They'll care even more when they ask him how he presently feels about those past crimes:

"What's the big deal? Finders keepers right?"

[oarabbus]

if the polygraph people decide to grill you on that mailbox thing you are gonna be ****ed for sure.

"well i got a sudden urge to look in a random mailbox, where i happened to find a random purse full of gift cards, which i took... but its cool cause they all ended up being empty"



They'll care even more when they ask him how he presently feels about those past crimes:

"What's the big deal? Finders keepers right?"


:roll:

legit laughing at these two posts

[gigantes]

holy shit, it's a swirling frenzy of blood and shark fins over here.

[Patrick Chewing]

They're not gonna care he ate shrooms in college maybe, but they ARE going to care he committed theft and identity fraud... the latter is a felony.


Depends on how descriptive the questions are. The question could be like this:

1. Have you ever stolen anything?


Or it could be like this:

1. Have you ever stolen anything? If so, describe what you have stolen.

If it's a question like the second one, he may still pass the polygraph, but he may get passed up for a "cleaner" candidate.

But methinks polygraph exams are close-ended questions primarily, and the descriptive part of his theft crimes really wouldn't fit in with the exam.

[CavaliersFTW]

:roll:

legit laughing at these two posts
Expects police to just be like:

http://i276.photobucket.com/albums/kk18/russo5485/well-played-sir-well-played-indeed.jpg

[Pushxx]

I don't think people appreciate how much of a family ISH is. Look at this thread. Helping this man out.

[enayes]

And you don't consider that stealing?

I didn't know whose iPod it was, so no I don't consider it stealing.

[NBAplayoffs2001]

I would love to do a polygraph test on a few people. I remember buzzfeed did a few cool videos about people doing it on their parents/children

[Draz]

This one guy polygraphed his wife to find out if she was a virgin

Turned out she got double penetrated when she was 14

[4 Inches]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rN7pkFNEg5c :bowdown:

[enayes]

if the polygraph people decide to grill you on that mailbox thing you are gonna be ****ed for sure.

"well i got a sudden urge to look in a random mailbox, where i happened to find a random purse full of gift cards, which i took... but its cool cause they all ended up being empty"

This made me LOL

I've been reading about control questions and certain countermeasures that can be used to help with the test. A common control question is "have you ever stolen anything?" Most people would have to say yes as this includes pencils, candy bars, etc. if they start to ask specific questions like stolen items of a certain value I might run into some trouble but I'm pretty sure I can beat the test

[TheSilentKiller]

enayes gotta be a troll. dudes been posting about petty theft / overall douchebaggery since i've been here. either he is a reallllllllllly dumb asshole or a sort of decent troll

[enayes]

enayes gotta be a troll. dudes been posting about petty theft / overall douchebaggery since i've been here. either he is a reallllllllllly dumb asshole or a sort of decent troll

All of my stories are real. I don't pretend to be a saint and we all have our flaws. It bothers my wife that she knows my first thought when I see a phone/purse is how I can get the item without being seen/caught but she still loves me. I'm not proud of my behavior but I'm not ashamed of it either.

[TheSilentKiller]

All of my stories are real. I don't pretend to be a saint and we all have our flaws. It bothers my wife that she knows my first thought when I see a phone/purse is how I can get the item without being seen/caught but she still loves me. I'm not proud of my behavior by I'm not ashamed of it.
:rolleyes:

[jongib369]

Should I mention doing shrooms in college on my application? I'm not sure if it asks specifically but if they ask me "have you ever done an illegal drug besides weed?" I would have to say yes.
Start practicing saying it now...Even start thinking of it as something that shouldn't be illegal/not a bad thing. Maybe not that specifically, just do what you can to make yourself think there's nothing wrong with it, therefore being able to ride the emotions(or in this case lack there of) saying it calmly.. Some people are able to lie/cry thinking of a tragic event in their life, while talking about something completely different. Ride the emotions MaaAAn

[oarabbus]

I didn't know whose iPod it was, so no I don't consider it stealing.



Stealing: Take (another person's property) without permission or legal right and without intending to return it.


So you literally have no remorse for stealing other people's shit?

[ace23]

i never "stole" a credit card, I found a guy's wallet and used a credit card to fill up my car and then tossed it, so not exactly stealing
Lmao

[CavaliersFTW]

All of my stories are real. I don't pretend to be a saint and we all have our flaws. It bothers my wife that she knows my first thought when I see a phone/purse is how I can get the item without being seen/caught but she still loves me. I'm not proud of my behavior but I'm not ashamed of it either.
I don't think you understand the repercussions of your actions, and I don't think you understand the conflict that would occur if you ever got caught. You know, some people get so mad about thievery they wouldn't hesitate to shoot and kill you if they caught you? I'm being deadly serious. What you're doing is morally wrong and many people feel strongly about how morally wrong it is. That's why thieves get punished in ALL societies in various forms. In the U.S. it's incarceration / fines / and a criminal record. In some countries it's fingers and hands being chopped off. In others it can even result in death.

On the flip side, people who return lost goods are rewarded with genuine thanks and gratitude and sometimes even a monetary reward if the person who lost said goods is in a position where they can give something in return.

Why do you think humans react so negatively and in such a strong way to thieves? Do you think they feel this strongly about them because it's no big deal? You should reconsider what you do.

[oarabbus]

I don't think you understand the repercussions of your actions, and I don't think you understand the conflict that would occur if you ever got caught. You know, some people get so mad about thievery they wouldn't hesitate to shoot and kill you if they caught you? I'm being deadly serious. What you're doing is morally wrong and many people feel strongly about how morally wrong it is. That's why thieves get punished in ALL societies in various forms. In the U.S. it's incarceration / fines / and a criminal record. In some countries it's fingers and hands being chopped off. In others it can even result in death.

On the flip side, people who return lost goods are often rewarded if the person who lost said goods is in a position where they can give something in return.

Why do you think humans react so negatively and in such a strong way to thieves? Do you think they feel this strongly about them because it's no big deal? You should reconsider what you do.

The one time I found a wallet (I literally found it on the street) I checked the ID for an address and returned to this kid's house. His mom gave me $20 for doing so, I refused it but she insisted so I took the money.

Then you have this guy breaking into people's property and taking cards out of their purses.

[Nanners]

All of my stories are real. I don't pretend to be a saint and we all have our flaws. It bothers my wife that she knows my first thought when I see a phone/purse is how I can get the item without being seen/caught but she still loves me. I'm not proud of my behavior but I'm not ashamed of it either.

you should be ashamed of it.

either your parents did a really crappy job or you are just crazy in the coconut, either way you should see a therapist or something because its not normal or healthy for your first thought upon seeing a valuable item to be "how can i steal that"

[jongib369]

Just don't go into it intimidated..They don't know you lied, the machine won't know either...Only you do, be calm in that fact.

[CavaliersFTW]

Here's a thief who got shot in the neck by an off duty cop slowly dying by suffocating to death.

http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=0d9_1447951413

And NO ONE present on the scene cares. Because that person was stealing. Thieves are people who deliberately take something someone else earned for personal gain. They give zero ****s about other people, only themselves. And so, when caught, it's awfully difficult for anyone to care about them.

I'm not saying it is right to die because of stealing - it isn't. But that indifference and even hatred toward you would legitimately be the attitude many people would have if you got incarcerated, injured or killed in the act of stealing. Because you'd forever just be known as the thief you exposed yourself to be. A thief is not only NOTHING to be proud of, it is something you should just never ever resort to doing unless maybe it was a matter of life and death for you and it meant stealing to eat to survive or something. I doubt that is you. You're probably just someone who doesn't need to gain at the expense of others and for god knows why just have this bad attitude and bad habit. But you're an adult, that habit needs curbed. You could end up a dead petty thief in a gruesome scene where nobody cares about your life because of your actions. Or you could never get caught, and never care. But what you do is with certainty, stealing. And people HATE that. So don't get caught.

[warriorfan]

enayes gotta be a troll. dudes been posting about petty theft / overall douchebaggery since i've been here. either he is a reallllllllllly dumb asshole or a sort of decent troll

I was thinking the same thing :roll:

[enayes]

I'm an opportunist. I don't seek out items to steal. But when something presents itself, such as a $20 bill on the sidewalk I take it. Some of you guys are blowing my actions out of proportion.

[TheSilentKiller]

I'm an opportunist. I DO seek out items to steal. And when something presents itself, such as a $20 bill in some apartment i snuck into because the door was unlocked, I take it along with the electronics and family heirlooms. Some of you guys are pointing out how i'm a douchebag and i don't like that
fixed for you

[CavaliersFTW]

I'm an opportunist. I don't seek out items to steal. But when something presents itself, such as a $20 bill on the sidewalk I take it. Some of you guys are blowing my actions out of proportion.
No man, you seek to take - keep, and then flip/use other peoples credit cards, phones, etc for personal gain.

You don't have a legal ownership of them. They're NEVER yours to profit off of. It's literally criminal. It's criminal because it is morally wrong.

And yeah, you actively looked in someone's mailbox. You actively stole from someone's property in a situation where you clearly knew the space you were taking it from was theirs. That's a felony.

Thief gon thief.

[oarabbus]

I'm an opportunist. I don't seek out items to steal. But when something presents itself, such as a $20 bill on the sidewalk I take it. Some of you guys are blowing my actions out of proportion.


There's a big difference between finding a $20 on the street and opening a mailbox, then opening a purse, and taking all the cards you are trolling right?

[CavaliersFTW]

There's a big difference between finding a $20 on the street and opening a mailbox, then opening a purse, and taking all the cards you are trolling right?
*Sees neighbors garage door open*

*Helps self to whatever is in there because the owner "left" it all there*

"Finders keepers"

[enayes]

No man, you seek to take - keep, and then flip/use other peoples credit cards, phones, etc for personal gain.

You don't have a legal ownership of them. They're NEVER yours to profit off of. It's literally criminal. It's criminal because it is morally wrong.

And yeah, you actively looked in someone's mailbox. You actively stole from someone's property in a situation where you clearly knew the space you were taking it from was theirs. That's a felony.

Thief gon thief.

The mailbox incident was wrong. That was the only time I felt like what I was doing was risky. I was also under 18 at the time.

[CavaliersFTW]

The mailbox incident was wrong. That was the only time I felt like what I was doing was risky. I was also under 18 at the time.
:biggums:

"risky"?

Ability to feel what is morally wrong is what the problem is.

Did you even feel that it was "wrong" to do? It's the burden you are placing on other people that is the problem not the "risk".

Some people have memories on phones, my girlfriend's sister died last year and she's got pics on her phone and I told her she needs to back them up and she's been doing it slowly. Some scum bag like you steals her phone because she left it in the booth at the bar? You **** with a persons personal memories. With credit cards it's identity theft and still illegal and a pain. But you start taking things like phones? It isn't even just monetary value at that point. You're like stealing a persons photo/video album. Logs of conversations they've had with people they cared about, etc.

[TheSilentKiller]

:biggums:

"risky"?

Ability to feel what is morally wrong is what the problem is.

Did you even feel that it was "wrong" to do? It's the burden you are placing on other people that is the problem not the "risk".

Some people have memories on phones, my girlfriend's sister died last year and she's got pics on her phone and I told her she needs to back them up and she's been doing it slowly. Some scum bag like you steals her phone because she left it in the booth at the bar? You **** with a persons personal memories. With credit cards it's identity theft and still illegal and a pain. But you start taking things like phones? It isn't even just monetary value at that point. You're like stealing a persons photo/video album. Logs of conversations they've had with people they cared about, etc.
yeah but he takes out the sim cards, so it's not that risky for him

[CavaliersFTW]

yeah but he takes out the sim cards, so it's not that risky for him
Yeah I get it. I'm just baffled that anyone could care so little about other people :oldlol:

[outbreak]

I found $50 in an envelope on the ground in a park and I spent it because how would I know who's it was? There was nothing but the money in there.

Another time I found $300 in the bushes on nature strip outside my neighbours house. I knocked on his door and it turns out he hides money for his cleaner under a bin in his yard, it had blown over and the money scattered in the bush. He thanked me and gave me $50 for returning it.

I found a wallet and phone in a change rooms with $100 cash and an I.D in it. I called the number that said "mum" in the phone, found out it was a girl who was shopping with her mum and had forgotten she put them down in there.

See the difference between those? One thing I found and couldn't really return which isn't stealing, the others I could find the rightful owner which would then be stealing if I kept it.

OP is a nut, your wife knows your first thought is how to steal something? You sound like you have mental issues. If you get the operators job will they come in one day and find all their phones have vanished but that's ok because finders keepers?

Going through someones mail is really ****ing low man, I'd have no problem with someone getting the shit kicked out of them if caught doing that.

Hopefully in the next few days we see an article about "Man applies for police job, get's arrested for federal crimes after failing polygraph test"

Maybe the whole application is a scam to solve some unsolved mail and credit card theft

[DeuceWallaces]

OP is a scumbag schmuck, but most of us already knew that.

[enayes]

I will bump this thread with my polygraph results, assuming I get to that point. Will be at least 2 weeks from now.
:D

[Verticality]

didnt you steal stuff out of mailboxes?

also you stole some credit cards right?

its not like you were just jay-walking, these are significant crimes. the mailbox one is a federal crime and a felony.
If he admits to these things, he likely goes to jail. Good luck OP!

[UK2K]

Start practicing saying it now...Even start thinking of it as something that shouldn't be illegal/not a bad thing. Maybe not that specifically, just do what you can to make yourself think there's nothing wrong with it, therefore being able to ride the emotions(or in this case lack there of) saying it calmly.. Some people are able to lie/cry thinking of a tragic event in their life, while talking about something completely different. Ride the emotions MaaAAn
That's how I passed mine.

If you tell yourself enough that you didn't do it, you begin to believe it.

That, and by singing happy birthday over and over (to keep some brain activity going).

Piece of cake. That's why they're inadmissible in court. Easy to cheat.

[highwhey]

That's how I passed mine.

If you tell yourself enough that you didn't do it, you begin to believe it.

That, and by singing happy birthday over and over (to keep some brain activity going).

Piece of cake. That's why they're inadmissible in court. Easy to cheat.
Why are you helping a thief?

[UK2K]

Why are you helping a thief?
I help anyone who asks for it...

But deep down I hope he fails hard, and gets arrested for his past crimes.

[Pushxx]

I help anyone who asks for it...

But deep down I hope he fails hard, and gets arrested for his past crimes.

You put utilitarianism over morals. I like it. Honestly I do the same.

Though deep down I actually don't give a shit about anything as long as nobody ****s with me and my shit.

[enayes]

That's how I passed mine.

If you tell yourself enough that you didn't do it, you begin to believe it.

That, and by singing happy birthday over and over (to keep some brain activity going).

Piece of cake. That's why they're inadmissible in court. Easy to cheat.

Are you recommending you do a brain activity during the control questions? Or questions that are relevant?

I've done some reading on countermeasures but I'm not sure if it's really necessary in my case.

[Charlie Sheen]

Are you recommending you do a brain activity during the control questions? Or questions that are relevant?

I've done some reading on countermeasures but I'm not sure if it's really necessary in my case.

What has got you so afraid of telling the truth?

[UK2K]

You put utilitarianism over morals. I like it. Honestly I do the same.

Though deep down I actually don't give a shit about anything as long as nobody ****s with me and my shit.

Sure, I'll help him out. I hope he fails, but I don't mind to help him pass it.

[UK2K]

Are you recommending you do a brain activity during the control questions? Or questions that are relevant?

I've done some reading on countermeasures but I'm not sure if it's really necessary in my case.

Zone out, and sing happy birthday to yourself over and over and over again. The whole time. In your mind, obviously, you'll still hear the questions and know when to answer.

Pick a spot on the wall, and stare right at it, and sing happy birthday to yourself.

The biggest part of it is convincing yourself that what you are saying is true. Seriously, go home, and tell yourself 1,000 times you never did it. Eventually, you will convince yourself it never happened.

Like I said, I had several issues before I joined the Marine Corps and got my security clearance (that I had to take a polygraph for, and have my whole family contacted) and then passed the two for two different departments. Its a mental game.

You never did it.

Unless you put it on your application, then you did do it, and it won't do you any good to lie about it.

Generally, they're only going to ask you what you admitted to on your application. They may ask you other random questions, but what they really want to know is... was that your only time? Was it when you said it was? They want to see if you are telling the whole truth.

If you never mentioned that stupid ass mailbox thing, then you never did it.

[oarabbus]

You put utilitarianism over morals. I like it. Honestly I do the same.

Though deep down I actually don't give a shit about anything as long as nobody ****s with me and my shit.


Yeah but this is a guy who would totally fu.ck with your shit if he had the opportunity to get away with it

[enayes]

Yeah but this is a guy who would totally fu.ck with your shit if he had the opportunity to get away with it

Not if you're my friend. And of course all ishers are my closest friends. Your safe chill.

[UK2K]

Not if you're my friend. And of course all ishers are my closest friends. Your safe chill.
The fact that you'd **** with people's shit who aren't your friends, makes me hope even more you get nervous as **** and fail.

[enayes]

I had my interview yesterday and it went pretty well.

I got a call today and unfortunately I have been disqualified due to background information I put on my application. I didn't want to lie because I thought the poly would end up screwing me if I did.

For drug use I was honest, I put down:
mushrooms used once in 2011
marijuana used 10-15 times over the last 5 years, last use August 2015

The department requires 3 FULL YEARS of being drug free INCLUDING MARIJUANA. Kinda sucks.

If I could go back I guess I would have lied on the application and tried to pass the poly but I didn't think marijuana would be looked at so negatively/

[Draz]

I had my interview yesterday and it went pretty well.

I got a call today and unfortunately I have been disqualified due to background information I put on my application. I didn't want to lie because I thought the poly would end up screwing me if I did.

For drug use I was honest, I put down:
mushrooms used once in 2011
marijuana used 10-15 times over the last 5 years, last use August 2015

The department requires 3 FULL YEARS of being drug free INCLUDING MARIJUANA. Kinda sucks.

If I could go back I guess I would have lied on the application and tried to pass the poly but I didn't think marijuana would be looked at so negatively/
On the bright side you can smoke some Mary now

[CavaliersFTW]

I had my interview yesterday and it went pretty well.

I got a call today and unfortunately I have been disqualified due to background information I put on my application. I didn't want to lie because I thought the poly would end up screwing me if I did.

For drug use I was honest, I put down:
mushrooms used once in 2011
marijuana used 10-15 times over the last 5 years, last use August 2015

The department requires 3 FULL YEARS of being drug free INCLUDING MARIJUANA. Kinda sucks.

If I could go back I guess I would have lied on the application and tried to pass the poly but I didn't think marijuana would be looked at so negatively/
OP you're a perplexing dude.

On the one hand I feel like you're honest and sincere, which is a likeable trait. On the other hand the things you are honest and sincere about are things like not giving a crap about stealing which is not a likeable trait. I'm torn between feeling bad that you didn't get the job, and relieved. I hope you are not without work in the meantime, then I'd just feel bad.

Anyways best of luck in your continued job hunt. I just hope one day you'll see the error in "finders keepers" :lol :cheers:

[enayes]

OP you're a perplexing dude.

On the one hand I feel like you're honest and sincere, which is a likeable trait. On the other hand the things you are honest and sincere about are things like not giving a crap about stealing which is not a likeable trait. I'm torn between feeling bad that you didn't get the job, and relieved. I hope you are not without work in the meantime, then I'd just feel bad.

Anyways best of luck in your continued job hunt. I just hope one day you'll see the error in "finders keepers" :lol :cheers:

Thanks for the kind words. I do have a job so I'll be alright. I really didn't think marijuana would disqualify me. I couldn't find a policy on it online and I thought asking about it before the interview would be a red flag. Oh well.

[highwhey]

Thanks for the kind words. I do have a job so I'll be alright. I really didn't think marijuana would disqualify me. I couldn't find a policy on it online and I thought asking about it before the interview would be a red flag. Oh well.
Don't let me find your gf.

"Finders keepers"

[UK2K]

I had my interview yesterday and it went pretty well.

I got a call today and unfortunately I have been disqualified due to background information I put on my application. I didn't want to lie because I thought the poly would end up screwing me if I did.

For drug use I was honest, I put down:
mushrooms used once in 2011
marijuana used 10-15 times over the last 5 years, last use August 2015

The department requires 3 FULL YEARS of being drug free INCLUDING MARIJUANA. Kinda sucks.

If I could go back I guess I would have lied on the application and tried to pass the poly but I didn't think marijuana would be looked at so negatively/
I told you that on like, page 2 or some shit.

What do I know lol

Page 2 actually


Yes. Admit to that.

You did it once for experimentation purposes, and didn't like it, so you didn't do it again. If it was more than a few years, I think 3, they'll let it slide.

[enayes]

I told you that on like, page 2 or some shit.

What do I know lol

Page 2 actually

You were referring to the shrooms though, which they didn't care about.

Some areas are stricter on weed then others. I didn't think they would have a 3 year requirement on weed lol

I used weed in August of 2015

[tomtucker]

how about another job where you can use your phone skills

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ILL7N8ACJUc

976 - HOTT

[DukeDelonte13]

here's a little secret for you all:

Polygraphs are complete and utter bullshit. They have no bearing on whether or not somebody is actually lying. Its a pseudo-scientific device that was invented in the 20's and hasn't really been changed since.

The trick is people think it's real so the idea is they'll confess everything before they do the test.


Despite all of this, law enforcement has a love affair with the polygraph. Most officers and detectives i've spoken with believe in their accuracy. I mean, TRULY believe. In blind studies they are shown to maybe have 50% accuracy.

WTF??


There is just such a leap to believe that some non medical person taking and interpreting various physiological responses that are maybe thought to have some sort of connection with lying with 1920's tech is an accurate way of discovering the truth.

[DukeDelonte13]

I had my interview yesterday and it went pretty well.

I got a call today and unfortunately I have been disqualified due to background information I put on my application. I didn't want to lie because I thought the poly would end up screwing me if I did.

For drug use I was honest, I put down:
mushrooms used once in 2011
marijuana used 10-15 times over the last 5 years, last use August 2015

The department requires 3 FULL YEARS of being drug free INCLUDING MARIJUANA. Kinda sucks.

If I could go back I guess I would have lied on the application and tried to pass the poly but I didn't think marijuana would be looked at so negatively/


That's very common

[UK2K]

You were referring to the shrooms though, which they didn't care about.

Some areas are stricter on weed then others. I didn't think they would have a 3 year requirement on weed lol

I used weed in August of 2015

They do. Most have a 3 year requirement on any drugs.

You can't have an officer (or your case, a police department employee) who violates the laws they are supposed to be enforcing. When I went out for those two police departments, they both asked questions on how I felt about drugs and if I would be willing to arrest a family member that I know is doing illegal drugs.

I told them exactly what they wanted to hear. I believe its a free country and you should be able to smoke whatever you want, but until the law is changed, it is still illegal.

[enayes]

If I knew the policy I would have lied and at least gotten to the polygraph phase. My interview went really well. I'm trying to convince myself I would have hated answering the calls all day.