I applied for a job at Walmart, but failed their assessment test...

[stalkerforlife]

Are you F UCKING KIDDING ME?

HOW THE F UCK DO YOU FAIL AN ASSESSMENT TEST THAT THEY SAID TO ANSWER WITH HONESTY? THERE ARE NO RIGHT OR WRONG F UCKING ANSWERS.

SHOULD I JUST PRESENT MYSELF AS THE BEST F UCKING PERSON TO EVER LIVE OR BE HONEST?

HOW THE F UCK?

I HATE SOCIETY AND I WILL FOREVER BE A F UCKING LOSER.

F UCK YOUR LYING ASS TEST.

F UCK YOU F UCK YOU F UCK YOU.

[Lebron23]

better luck next time bro.

[Im Still Ballin]

Just...

A...

Normal...

Guy...

[nathanjizzle]

who cares about walmart. apply for a job at walgreens. and this time, use what you have learned from the last interview. you now, thats what you do to become a better human? you learn.

[Im Still Ballin]

who cares about walmart. apply for a job at walgreens. and this time, use what you have learned from the last interview. you now, thats what you do to become a better human? you learn.
Good advice nathan

[BlakFrankWhite]

What

A

Time

[dude77]

SHOULD I JUST PRESENT MYSELF AS THE BEST F UCKING PERSON TO EVER LIVE OR BE HONEST?


serious question ? lol

you always present yourself in the best possible light .. no matter what .. even if you have to lie .. no one wants to hire an 'honest loser' ..

now of course you have to back it up if you're hired .. no slacking

[JohnnySic]

Haha, those stupid tests. Always lie and pick the answers that make you look good.

[Jameerthefear]

Well, at least you tried :)
Try Publix next. IDK though since you have a criminal record

[UK2K]

SHOULD I JUST PRESENT MYSELF AS THE BEST F UCKING PERSON TO EVER LIVE OR BE HONEST?



Depends. I never lie about myself in interviews, and I've never interviewed for a job I didn't get an offer for. Here, check this out:


When it came to identifying what skills are the most difficult to find among applicants and new hires, several “soft skills” that are traditionally not assessed in an education setting were at the top.

Work ethic was the most lacking at 55%. Communication, problem solving and attendance/punctuality each registered 42-43%. Each of these soft skills was indicated as far more challenging to find than academic skills, such as reading, writing and math. Only 10% of the respondents said they had no challenges finding the skills they needed.

If you show up to mother ****ing work on time and actually work, you are already ahead of over half the country.

That's how ****ing easy it is to get a job these days. 'Can't find a job, there are no jobs!' Act like a normal person, and you can get a job. It's not hard.

I've never lied about myself. Don't need to. I am who I am and it's more important (in my eyes and in the eyes of my Director of HR aunt) that you be easy to work with and fit in as 'normal' vs whether or not you can actually do the job.

Barring some advanced job working with rockets or some shit, anybody can be taught any job. The most important thing is to be honest, be personable (make them like you), and act ****ing normal. And display you're not a complete dumbass.

So, take that advice and apply it to the next interview.

PS: I always go into a job interview with a 'don't give a **** attitude'. If you get the job, cool. If you don't, nothing in your life changes. Make them want you, not the other way around. As I showed, if you halfway show you're not a lazy psycho, it shouldn't be that hard.

It's not a 'no education' or 'there are no jobs' problem, it's a work ethic problem. That's why college kids aren't getting jobs. Not because they aren't educated, but because they're **** ups and nobody wants to work with them.

[DingDengDong]

I HATE SOCIETY AND I WILL FOREVER BE A F UCKING LOSER.


I honestly wouldn't have hired you either.

[Patrick Chewing]

OP dumb as ****.

[Take Your Lumps]

Dude. We can't build that wall. We have red blooded Americans who are apparently too stupid to fall into the shittiest jobs we have to offer.

What a time to be an American.

[riseagainst]

Keep yo head up bro. Don't give up.

[Back In Shape]

The second you Google your name in images there's a photo of your mugshot. Idk if WalMart checks such things but it will affect your job opportunities. You may have to consider picking oranges with the illegals. The world needs orange juice.

[Draz]

Apply for internships. Work for free. Get your hours in. Build a resume. You gain experience. Employers love people who have hours stacked doing internships. You'll be rewarded with entry level jobs. Pay starting from $9-12. It'll be better than Walmart jobs. Work for non profit organizations. Apply.

Your other choices are kmart, walgreens, cvs, stop and stop, Costco, BJ's, Sams club. Do construction. Construction has money upwards of $14-30. You can easily get in without experience or training. Just physical labor.

Work out. Hit the gym. Get in shape. Learn a trade if you want.

[Tarik One]

Portillos is ALWAYS hiring...

[Nikola_]

Theres got to be something that you do better than others OP ...

[Draz]

Start taking OP serious. He's obviously not trolling and he sincerely needs help. It sounds like he's adding sarcasm but truth be told he's been brutally honest about his life outside of here. He has a wife and kid(s) while his wife is the only one employed.

If I had a wife and kid I'd do anything to get income. Cashier. Whatever the reputation comes with I'll deal with. You need to get yourself together. The only excuse for this lifestyle is you're going to school and trying to obtain a degree or certification, and even then you need to do something to make some type of income. Having children and a wife means you need to be the head of the household.

Even going to school you should have a part time job. You chose to have a kid. You don't ever want God forbid anything were to happy to your family health wise and you don't have money for the bills. You should have a savings of up to $5-10k put aside for emergency funds.

Tell us what you CAN do. Your previous experiences. What you're capable of doing under stress. If physical labor is something you can do as I mentioned construction will not think twice of your criminal history. You'll get paid twice as much and depending on the contract you'll have work for a short period. You'll network and start being called for other contracts.

YOUTUBE. You can learn anything you want off of YouTube bro. I use YouTube as an educational resources. You want to learn how to fix cars? Search the top mechanics up and watch their videos religiously. You can learn a trade off of YouTube alone off of tutorials. Save up enough for a certification after.

Take free courses online that give you a certification after you're done. Pay for courses online $10-20 and earn certifications. With or without it just open your mind to learning. Don't spend a day without learning something new.

Go go khanacademy.com and codeacademy.com, learn programming or Web designing.

Go to the casino and apply for jobs. Apply anywhere like schools for janitor positions.

There's no excuse to have the baggage you have and not being in control. You have a few people here willing to help you equip yourself but you need to show signs of wanting to change.

The list goes on and on with what you can do.

[BasedTom]

Pretty damn obvious they wouldn't hire a guy putting "nah I'm not gonna take it very seriously, just gonna eat shit and collect a cheque" especially a dude with a criminal record

Even if you plan on doing that you have to bs the questions and interview

[Patrick Chewing]

The second you Google your name in images there's a photo of your mugshot. Idk if WalMart checks such things but it will affect your job opportunities. You may have to consider picking oranges with the illegals. The world needs orange juice.


This.


This guy makes it a point to exploit his shortcomings and criminal history and then wonders why employers won't hire him.

[Draz]

What criminal offense does he have?

[Levity]

- apply as a night stocker at costco
- lie on your test
- ?????????
- fck bitches, get money.

[Draz]

- apply as a night stocker at costco
- lie on your test
- ?????????
- fck bitches, get money.
A night stocker would require him to have to be able to know how to use certain machinary like forklift, unless they teach you, it's common sense, or he already knows, that's not a bad gig.

Part time especially? The fck why not.

I think OP is heavily focused on what everyone else his age "is doing" or "achieving" seeing his peers evolve before him that he thinks it's all or nothing. That's not how the real world goes. People make fine living making $12-14 an hour. It's HOW you live. Someones $14 p/hr is someone else's $28.

There's people in college still in their late 30's & 40's doing career changes. I'm in class, the medium age would be 30-33. You find yourself in your 20's and 30's, by 35 you should be on your way to promotions or a career.

[UK2K]

I think you need to apply somewhere OTHER than a multi-billion dollar corporation.

[Patrick Chewing]

What criminal offense does he have?



Peeping Tom :lol

[stalkerforlife]

Thanks for all the responses, guys.

To be clear, this was a simple assessment test online; I didn't even make it to the interview process! I obviously did not make myself look bad, but I didn't lie, either. Before the assessment, I was told to be completely honest and there are no right or wrong answers.

They have no clue about my background of misdemeanors because it never made it that far; I couldn't even pass their stupid ass assessment test to see if I was even a candidate!

NEVER again wonder why theft and murder take place...THIS IS WHY. I am disenfranchised and I guarantee so are all the criminals out there. I have not turned to a life of crime yet, but I definitely do NOT judge anyone that does.

And this test will be valid for 60 days and I can't apply again until the 60 days are up!

[stalkerforlife]

And i'm PISSED the F UCK OFF BECAUSE I SEE SLOWER PEOPLE WORKING AT WALMART ALL THE F UCKING TIME THAT HAVE A HARD TIME F UCKING SOCIALIZING PROPERLY OR COUNTING CHANGE. ONE WOMAN AT THE WALMART DOWN THE F UCKING STREET HAS A TATTOO COVERING HER ENTIRE F UCKING FACE!

GIVE ME AN OPPORTUNITY TOO YOU SHIT FOR BRAINS F UCKS!

[Bless Mathews]

Stay up nips.

Go to your local porn shop. They'll hire you

[9erempiree]

Those assessment tests are looking for consistency.

They are looking to see if you are a sheep or not.

I wouldn't worry too much except if you are looking for a mainstream jobs from big retailers. Its their way to filter out all the applications that they received.

[bigkingsfan]

Intel just had layoffs, perfect time to strike.

[UK2K]

Thanks for all the responses, guys.

To be clear, this was a simple assessment test online; I didn't even make it to the interview process! I obviously did not make myself look bad, but I didn't lie, either. Before the assessment, I was told to be completely honest and there are no right or wrong answers.

They have no clue about my background of misdemeanors because it never made it that far; I couldn't even pass their stupid ass assessment test to see if I was even a candidate!

NEVER again wonder why theft and murder take place...THIS IS WHY. I am disenfranchised and I guarantee so are all the criminals out there. I have not turned to a life of crime yet, but I definitely do NOT judge anyone that does.

And this test will be valid for 60 days and I can't apply again until the 60 days are up!

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-JNZcpH7rxO0/VU7j_nE2xhI/AAAAAAAAAmI/hED5Bk73rYU/s1600/damn.png

[Draz]

Thanks for all the responses, guys.

To be clear, this was a simple assessment test online; I didn't even make it to the interview process! I obviously did not make myself look bad, but I didn't lie, either. Before the assessment, I was told to be completely honest and there are no right or wrong answers.

They have no clue about my background of misdemeanors because it never made it that far; I couldn't even pass their stupid ass assessment test to see if I was even a candidate!

NEVER again wonder why theft and murder take place...THIS IS WHY. I am disenfranchised and I guarantee so are all the criminals out there. I have not turned to a life of crime yet, but I definitely do NOT judge anyone that does.

And this test will be valid for 60 days and I can't apply again until the 60 days are up!
That's how the world works. Companies hire the people that wouldn't want to work there like over qualified degree holders. Criminals or high school degree/ged people are majority of what runs the business. Their lives depend on some of these jobs. I can see you getting past the interview stage with your history, as long as you haven't been charged with theft/robbery. People make mistakes.

[UK2K]

Are you F UCKING KIDDING ME?

HOW THE F UCK DO YOU FAIL AN ASSESSMENT TEST THAT THEY SAID TO ANSWER WITH HONESTY? THERE ARE NO RIGHT OR WRONG F UCKING ANSWERS.

SHOULD I JUST PRESENT MYSELF AS THE BEST F UCKING PERSON TO EVER LIVE OR BE HONEST?

HOW THE F UCK?

I HATE SOCIETY AND I WILL FOREVER BE A F UCKING LOSER.

F UCK YOUR LYING ASS TEST.

F UCK YOU F UCK YOU F UCK YOU.
Send us the link. We should all take it and see who gets call backs lol

[Patrick Chewing]

Those questionnaires look for consistency in your answers. There are no right and wrong answers because it's not a school quiz.

What they look for is consistency due to the fact that they ask you the same questions multiple times throughout the assessment. They may word these questions differently, but they basically have the same meaning. If your answers are different because the questions confused you or you could not remember your previous answer, then you are marked for that.

Many companies do this to weed out those with poor attention skills I suppose.

Don't feel bad, OP. I've failed those plenty of times for companies in which I would have DOMINATED the workplace. Their loss.

Don't worry, OP. There is always something else. They would have nailed you on the Background anyway.

[UK2K]

Honestly I could give you my girlfriends email and she could get you a job but...

I've heard you're a piece of shit.

[Patrick Chewing]

I give props to OP for trying to better his pathetic life. Right now, he's just a government moocher.


OP lives in Florida. Maybe he can become an alligator wrestler or something.

[Smoke117]

It's not like you would have been able to face anybody at work after they got a good look at that pock marked face anyway...hs all over again for you.

[poido123]

OP is one funny guy


His character on here is hilarious :roll:


If you can't get a job at Walmart...You f.cked right?

[Hawker]

It's ok. I was 16 when I was applying for these type of jobs and I didn't realize until a couple years later that I had to lie on these tests to get a job.

[knickballer]

It's ok. I was 16 when I was applying for these type of jobs and I didn't realize until a couple years later that I had to lie on these tests to get a job.

I'm pretty sure OP is like 30, married with kids...

[bdreason]

When they ask you if you've ever stolen anything from a previous job, you're supposed to check "no". They aren't looking for honesty, they're just looking to limit their own liability.

[poido123]

I'm pretty sure OP is like 30, married with kids...


He says his Mrs. left him for a black man with a bigger package.


If that doesn't crush your soul...

[Draz]

When they ask you if you've ever stolen anything from a previous job, you're supposed to check "no". They aren't looking for honesty, they're just looking to limit their own liability.
Use this as reference. Answer to whatever limits liability without honesty, and anything that "steals the company's money" in regards to seeing a theft, going to a supervisor to report it, etc.

[stalkerforlife]

I can't answer all the questions, but of course I would never admit to stealing from the workplace. (And I never have)

And I am still with my girlfriend and we have two kids together. I am trying to get back into the working world so that I can teach my kids to have a strong work ethic.

I have not worked in 5 years because I've been on social security for depression and anxiety. I am simply trying to better myself, but society won't let me.

[Dray n Klay]

Justin...

[ALBballer]

I can't answer all the questions, but of course I would never admit to stealing from the workplace. (And I never have)

And I am still with my girlfriend and we have two kids together. I am trying to get back into the working world so that I can teach my kids to have a strong work ethic.

I have not worked in 5 years because I've been on social security for depression and anxiety. I am simply trying to better myself, but society won't let me.

Stop acting like a bitch. You got rejected from one place and you are acting like there aren't any other opportunities available. Apply to more places which should be easy since most of it is done online, look on craigslist for side gigs and ask friends and family if they know any places that are hiring.

[Draz]

I can't answer all the questions, but of course I would never admit to stealing from the workplace. (And I never have)

And I am still with my girlfriend and we have two kids together. I am trying to get back into the working world so that I can teach my kids to have a strong work ethic.

I have not worked in 5 years because I've been on social security for depression and anxiety. I am simply trying to better myself, but society won't let me.

As the poster above mentioned, Craigslist, Backpage, Indeed, Monster, these are all places to go. The last two requires a resume. The first two you can search for gigs, but the jobs section will require emailing your resume/cover letter.

There should also be something called a "work force" program somewhere that helps you find a job. My friend went to some and they found him some jobs. Search work force on google with your zipcode. Go to the nearest one. I believe they also help you create resumes. Go to your local library, get a library card, start taking home books and using the computers to your advantage. There's a printing limit, usually here its 20 per day. Print whatever you require. Make 20 copies of your resumes. Go to local stores, hand them regardless if they're hiring. Wear professional clothing when handing them in, be presentable.

There's also working in the kitchen. Be a dish washer. I helped some guy my age make a resume, he was applying to do that. Those jobs are easy to get, no skill, and usually minimum wage but it's an instant job if you're desperate for a gig until you find something better.

[shlver]

I applied for pharmacy cashier after high school and they didn't have an assessment test. I've been hearing they don't even drug test new employees anymore because turnover is so high and they can't find people that will pass.

[knickballer]

I applied for pharmacy cashier after high school and they didn't have an assessment test. I've been hearing they don't even drug test new employees anymore because turnover is so high and they can't find people that will pass.

Might depend on the company. I used to work for a big retailer and I never did a drug test either.

[Draz]

Might depend on the company. I used to work for a big retailer and I never did a drug test either.
You think perhaps they trusted you didn't do drugs? Probably just didn't want to do it to you?

[highwhey]

I applied for pharmacy cashier after high school and they didn't have an assessment test. I've been hearing they don't even drug test new employees anymore because turnover is so high and they can't find people that will pass.
I worked in the pharmacy at walmart when i was younger also, they had an assessment test and drug tests.

[HylianNightmare]

That sucks

[shlver]

I worked in the pharmacy at walmart when i was younger also, they had an assessment test and drug tests.
I got drug tested but I don't remember an assessment test. This was 6-7 years ago so I might be wrong, I also got referred by a friend who was leaving the position.

[G-train]

How many hours do you spend on forums that you could spend bettering your job prospects?
Take responsibility for yourself and stop blaming everyone else.

[BigNBAfan]

I'm assuming it went something like this

Stalker: Hi how are you doing? My name is Justin and I have severe acne and a lot of posts on the internet.

Manager: Well Acne Justin, why do you think you're a good candidate for the job?

Stalker: Because i've been a loser my whole life, if i cannot make it at walmart as a greeter i am hopeless.

Manager: Sounds like you are the latter, i'm sorry. I hope the best for you and your family.

[West-Side]

Next time don't answer questions in this manner:

Have you ever been fired? Yes.
Do you have strong interpersonal skills? No.
Do you have a criminal record? Yes.
What is your hobby? Insidehoops forum.

These assessment tests look for 3 things: 1) are you a fit? 2) are you a liability and 3) do you possess work ethic.

Work ethic consists of motivation traits more than education or credentials. They don't care if you have an MBA, in fact, Wal Mart wants people with no future so they increase their retention rate. However, if you admitted to a criminal record, were inconsistent with your answers (they look at it as dishonest and therefore a poor fit) or answered certain situational questions in a way that does not promote work ethic or iniatitives/dedication... they'll call the people that didn't.

Don't be hard on yourself, these self assessments don't mean you're unqualified or dumb, sometimes you just didn't get a call because others had better answers or the HR people were lazy at their job (which happens 90% of the time especially in place like Wal mart where there is huge turn over rate).

Keep applying don't give up.

[highwhey]

I got drug tested but I don't remember an assessment test. This was 6-7 years ago so I might be wrong, I also got referred by a friend who was leaving the position.
Ha, i got referred too. I was there about 5 years ago.

[Draz]

Ha, i got referred too. I was there about 5 years ago.
Who this

[highwhey]

Who this
Nvgga show us your tattoo c'mon

[Kvnzhangyay]

Bro just get a CFP and become a financial advisor

PWM is such an easy industry to break into, and it pays well if you got good sales skills

[SupermanOnSteroids]

damn, they fired me from being the shit picker upper at the animal shelter. something about molesting dogs. whaaaaaaaaat? :mad: :mad: :mad: :wtf: