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View Full Version : Dahntay Jones, professional cheap shot artist, hit Bismack Biyombo in the groin



coined
05-22-2016, 12:18 PM
http://www.sbnation.com/nba/2016/5/22/11735662/cavaliers-raptors-dahntay-jones-bismack-biyombo

Jones, one of Cleveland's deepest bench players, entered in garbage time and found himself matched up against Biyombo, who has been absolutely critical for Toronto since the loss of Jonas Valanciunas. Perhaps this was accidental, as Jones does appear to be flailing a bit. But if this was an accident, it's awfully convenient that it happened literally four seconds after Jones entered the game. And Jones has a bit of a history.

Who won the rebound didn't matter, but the ramifications of a dickpunch could be. Let's say Biyombo got upset that somebody punched him in his groin, and made a rash decision to swing back. Jones and Biyombo each get suspended for Game 4. The Cavs would be fine going forward without their 15th man, while the Raptors' already thin frontcourt would be thinned even more.

Dahntay Jones is not on the Cavaliers to serve a basketball purpose. He was signed on April 13, the day of the meaningless final game of Cleveland's regular season. Heading into the most meaningful part of the NBA season, Cleveland had an empty spot on their roster. By signing anybody, they could reduce the risk of a good player missing important basketball due to an injury suffered playing unimportant basketball, like the season finale or playoff garbage time.

So what type of player did they try to get with that 15th spot?

Did they need a young player who could develop into something meaningful down the line? No. It's time for the Playoffs. If the Cavs wanted to work on a project, they would've signed him in October.

Did they need a backup center, in case something happens to one of their big men? No, they already have those. At this point Timofey Mozgov is their third-string center, which I suppose makes Sasha Kaun their fourth-string center. They don't need a fifth-string.

Did they need a strong veteran voice in the clubhouse with playoff experience to keep the team centered in the most important part of the year? The Cavs already have Richard Jefferson and Mo Williams and James Jones. They're building a nursing home down on the end of the bench.

coined
05-22-2016, 12:19 PM
Did they need an extra shooter? Can't hurt, right? I mean, they already have James Jones, who isn't playing much, and Jordan McRae, who scored 36 points in the season finale but has only played one minute in the postseason.

Did they need an extra point guard? If something happens to Kyrie Irving, Matthew Dellavedova and Mo Williams, the Cavs are just gonna have LeBron play point. And if something happens to LeBron, well, why bother.

The Cavs have 11th, 12th, 13th and 14th men who play every conceivable reserve role the team needs. So with their 15th man, they weren't actually looking for somebody to make Cleveland better at basketball. They were looking for somebody who could bother opponents into making them worse, and Jones was the perfect signing.

Once upon a time, Jones was a meaningful NBA player. He started on a 2009 Nuggets team that made it all the way to the conference finals. He wasn't good at shooting and would probably have an aneurysm if asked to run point, but he was really athletic and dedicated to shutting down opposing scorers. As happens to many players dedicated to shutting down opposing scorers, he got good at personally irritating them. He upset Kobe Bryant in those 2009 playoffs with a blatant trip:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z6BWYMjTs3c

In 2013, he sprained Bryant's ankle by cutting under him as he shot, a dirty move that Bryant certainly felt was intentional:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O17UdfvSH-o

But athleticism disappears with age. Jones' best basketball skill vanished. By 2013, he was the same awful offensive player he always was, but without the trademark defense that got him NBA gigs. All that was left was the irritation factor. Nobody signed him in the 2013-14 season. Last year, he played poorly in limited minutes with the Clippers. But he still managed to find a way to upset opponents, even in games he didn't play. He upset Draymond Green by bumping into him during a postgame interview:

Jones has long claimed his actions, from undercutting Kobe to bumping Green, have been unintentional. If asked, he'd probably claim he didn't mean to smack Biyombo in the junk either. But clearly he knows what he's doing. You don't get into two incidents with opposing stars in a combined two minutes of playing time by accident.


Jones has found a way to be useful to NBA teams despite the fact that he no longer has NBA-level basketball talent. If he wants teams to sign him and not [X basketball player, who most likely is better at basketball than Dahntay Jones], he has to provide a service nobody else can. And he's doing it. Dahntay Jones will earn more money in two months of dedicated goonery than I will in an entire year, and by punching a good opposing player in the *****, he's earned it.

My only hope is that his actions don't actually affect the playoffs in any way, because I like basketball, and Jones is not here to play basketball.

scuzzy
05-22-2016, 12:34 PM
Bash brother :cheers:

PP34Deuce
05-22-2016, 01:11 PM
Lue knows how dirty golden state can be. Gotta have 2 goons.