Do you take back beer you brought over as a guest?

[hateraid]

Over the weekend I invited a friend over to watch the Cavs/Raps game. He brings over a 4 pack of beer. He puts it in the fridge and I suggest to drink mine because it's already cold. So we polish of 4 each of my beer and decide to go play pool since the game was over. We decide to leave his beer there so when we're done we can have night cap beers when we get home. We go to the pool hall, which I pay, I buy us 3 rounds and he bought none. We finish up and head back to my house. By then we're cashed and don't feel like having another one. I call it a night and my buddy does too, takes off to go home. Next morning I look in the fridge and he took his beer with him.

Now I don't feel obligated to his beer, but wouldn't it be a good gesture to leave the beer behind as a thank you for your hospitality? Or even as a gift offering when you come over like a bottle of wine? Thoughts?

[Bosnian Sajo]

Your friend is cheap af, I hate people like that. Honestly that says soooo much about him, especially the fact that you drove to the pool hall, you payed for all 3 rounds, and yall were drinking your beer AT YOUR HOUSE. After all that the dude has the nerve to take his sorry ass 4 pack home? **** him. It's not like he brought an 18 pack or something big, that shit probably cost him $10 bucks at the gas station.


To him, his $1 is worth more than your $10. People like that should be dropped like flies man, he ain't worth shit. Punk ass dude.

[Akrazotile]

I have a couple friends with whom I'd do somethin like this (altho not if theyd also paid for a bunch of pool rounds and beers at the bar) just because they they know Im on a pretty tight budget and that I typically try to pay my share when we hang out but sometimes have to squeeze a bit. Maybe he's on a tight budget and just wanted to grab it so he can bring it over next weekend as a thanks for you supplying brews this time, rather than have you use them this week and him having to buy another one next time.

It all just depends on circumstance. Cant really judge it on this one incident alone, have to consider it in a greater context of what you know about the guy, which obviously is info we dont have access to.

[JohnnySic]

Of course not, that's wack.

[hateraid]

I have a couple friends with whom I'd do somethin like this (altho not if theyd also paid for a bunch of pool rounds and beers at the bar) just because they they know Im on a pretty tight budget and that I typically try to pay my share when we hang out but sometimes have to squeeze a bit. Maybe he's on a tight budget and just wanted to grab it so he can bring it over next weekend as a thanks for you supplying brews this time, rather than have you use them this week and him having to buy another one next time.

It all just depends on circumstance. Cant really judge it on this one incident alone, have to consider it in a greater context of what you know about the guy, which obviously is info we dont have access to.

Regardless of the scenario isn't a gesture of hospitality? You bring something to someone's house as a thank you for having me over. Otherwise don't bring anything at all. What if that was a bag of chips? Or a cake? If it's unopened or uneaten would you take it home?

[highwhey]

Regardless of the scenario isn't a gesture of hospitality? You bring something to someone's house as a thank you for having me over. Otherwise don't bring anything at all. What if that was a bag of chips? Or a cake? If it's unopened or uneaten would you take it home?
When I've been on tight budgets aka broke and brought over something like beer or chips, While it may have been tempting to take it especially if it was unopened, I never did it because it's a lack of respek. Once you brig something to someone's home, it is theirs now. No take backs.

[DeuceWallaces]

I wouldn't take back beer or average wine, but if I bring over a bottle of decent bourbon I take it with me.

[Akrazotile]

Regardless of the scenario isn't a gesture of hospitality? You bring something to someone's house as a thank you for having me over. Otherwise don't bring anything at all. What if that was a bag of chips? Or a cake? If it's unopened or uneaten would you take it home?


I think bringing somethin over as a gift is typically done in more formal occasions, when a host may have spent time cooking a big meal for a gathering, or is providing refreshments for a large number of people, or arranging a bunch of details for a get together, with lots of dishes and cleanup to be done afterward etc. Usually IMO just having a friend over to watch a game doesn't necessitate a hospitality present.

As I said, maybe he brought the beers in case you didn't have any stocked at the moment, but since you did he figured he'd take them home and just bring the beers again next time. Or maybe he's just an outright cheapskate, I think there's really no way to know based off a single incident.

[UK2K]

Over the weekend I invited a friend over to watch the Cavs/Raps game. He brings over a 4 pack of beer. He puts it in the fridge and I suggest to drink mine because it's already cold. So we polish of 4 each of my beer and decide to go play pool since the game was over. We decide to leave his beer there so when we're done we can have night cap beers when we get home. We go to the pool hall, which I pay, I buy us 3 rounds and he bought none. We finish up and head back to my house. By then we're cashed and don't feel like having another one. I call it a night and my buddy does too, takes off to go home. Next morning I look in the fridge and he took his beer with him.

Now I don't feel obligated to his beer, but wouldn't it be a good gesture to leave the beer behind as a thank you for your hospitality? Or even as a gift offering when you come over like a bottle of wine? Thoughts?

Wine is different. I don't drink a whole lot, but I always take my leftover beer if there's more than one or two left.

[UK2K]

I think bringing somethin over as a gift is typically done in more formal occasions, when a host may have spent time cooking a big meal for a gathering, or is providing refreshments for a large number of people, or arranging a bunch of details for a get together, with lots of dishes and cleanup to be done afterward etc. Usually IMO just having a friend over to watch a game doesn't necessitate a hospitality present.

As I said, maybe he brought the beers in case you didn't have any stocked at the moment, but since you did he figured he'd take them home and just bring the beers again next time. Or maybe he's just an outright cheapskate, I think there's really no way to know based off a single incident.

What's up, guy? Where ya been?

[Bosnian Sajo]

Wine is different. I don't drink a whole lot, but I always take my leftover beer if there's more than one or two left.

Hell yea bro, you'd be crazy leaving $7 worth of beer at your friends house for him to enjoy, better take it for yourself.

[stalkerforlife]

You have more money than him.

And you let him drive home drunk or at least over the legal limit.

Neither one of you are good friends.

[highwhey]

Hell yea bro, you'd be crazy leaving $7 worth of beer at your friends house for him to enjoy, better take it for yourself.
:oldlol:

[oh the horror]

That's super tacky. Especially since he was drinking on your dollar all night? Wow

[tomtucker]

only 2 ways about this...........
1. he

[Akrazotile]

What's up, guy? Where ya been?


Hey, yeah Ive been hard at work on my projects, which are actually moving along well and Im very encouraged about. But ofc with the NBA playoffs finally heating up I had to make a stop back at ISH and enjoy the excitement for the next few weeks!


How's thangs with you??

[UK2K]

Hey, yeah Ive been hard at work on my projects, which are actually moving along well and Im very encouraged about. But ofc with the NBA playoffs finally heating up I had to make a stop back at ISH and enjoy the excitement for the next few weeks!


How's thangs with you??

Same shit, different day. I had a picture I was gonna send you (no homo) but apparently we aren't allowed to send messages.

[Akrazotile]

Same shit, different day. I had a picture I was gonna send you (no homo) but apparently we aren't allowed to send messages.


Heh, it's amazing Jeff/Steve STILL have PM's off. The management of this site has been so bad for so long I guess it's just become part of the charm. I appreciate the thought though, Ill try to figure somethin out.

This thing is gonna be pretty exciting tho man. I think it's poised to do somethin really cool and start a new kind of precedent. Still continuing to put details together behind the scenes, but we buildin! We In Here (Soon)!!

[enayes]

He should have checked with you and asked if you wanted it.

If it's a beer you don't really like you might have told him to just take it.

He may have went home and drank it all alone, is he recently divorced?

[UK2K]

Only time I will leave beer is...

A lot of my friends live in other states. So when I go visit, I take beer that is made here but not elsewhere...

Yuengling for example.

[ALBballer]

Hateraid you post a lot of weird social interactions. You have some weird friends.

[Smoke117]

I just bring bud and pack bowls or roll up a blunt. I don't know anyone who would take back something they brought as a guest though...

[UK2K]

I just bring bud and pack bowls or roll up a blunt. I don't know anyone who would take back something they brought as a guest though...

For myself....

I don't share unless I'm in my own domain.

[hateraid]

Hateraid you post a lot of weird social interactions. You have some weird friends.

:lol
I was just thinking that
But I think we've all had friends/situations similar to the ones I post. I'm just seeing how different people react to them

[hateraid]

You have more money than him.

And you let him drive home drunk or at least over the legal limit.

Neither one of you are good friends.

I don't drink and drive. We cabbed to the pool bar and he walked 2 blocks home.
Ask before you criticize someone.

[Smoke117]

If you are going to bring alcohol you should just go to rite aid and get one of those cheap low life bottles of vodka they have lol

[hateraid]

He should have checked with you and asked if you wanted it.

If it's a beer you don't really like you might have told him to just take it.

He may have went home and drank it all alone, is he recently divorced?
Absolutely. If he asked if could take it home, I still would have thought he was a cheap ass, but at least respect that he asked. I would have let him take it, but I would also remind him he drank my beer

[ArbitraryWater]

Hateraid you post a lot of weird social interactions. You have some weird friends.

I was about to say he still hanging out with the wrong people..

hateraid, DEY NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU! :cheers:

[hateraid]

I was about to say he still hanging out with the wrong people..

hateraid, DEY NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU! :cheers:

You're too kind :cheers:

I have a ton of great friends. It's the weird ones that are interesting to post about :lol

[DaHeezy]

That's pretty cheap. I'd invite him over again and demand the next time drinks on him

[Cali Syndicate]

I've taken my beer home before. Some of my friends that host games or PPV events don't drink so it makes no sense to leave it, or even less sense to give it to someone else. Outside of this, no. If I brought it for a party, it stays for the host regardless.

[Draz]

Oh man. You definitely need to drop that friend. Set the tone RIGHT NOW for that mfer. If you don't, chances are he will lose you and other friends, as well as other potential friends. He really lowered the bar there. It sucks, people like that exist.

Just yesterday, I tried avoiding a friend. I'm pretty much his only real guy friend. He begs to come over. I told him I had things to do, another time. He forces his away to tag along. I then told him I cancelled so he can come over. He then attempts to invite a friend over (his girl best friend who I don't find attractive at all one, and two, without my permission) jokingly. And two days in a row, I have to drop him home. He just sits there pretending to miss his train the first day, and I offer to take him home. Yesterday, I was pretty much obligated to take him home. The train station is one block away from my house. It's also stupid because it's about 5-6 stops to his house.

Pisses me off. If you're coming over to my house, especially when you invite yourself over, make sure you know how you're getting home. I'm setting the tone now for his ass.

Edit: Keep in mind. This "friend" is my age. He has his "own" house, rents it and lives with his parents. His parents have "three" houses. And they also have "property" in other states. But he's known to be very cheap. He can't afford to do this, or that. His girlfriend of three years recently broke up with him. She lived about 10 miles away. I asked how often they seen each other, it was once a week or every two weeks. He couldn't even pick her up. He has a BMW 5 series. He tells HER to take the train to see him, to which he'd then drop her home at least. He also has a great job. He doesn't pay bills. He's the only kid. How can someone be so cheap?

Crazy.

[iamgine]

Over the weekend I invited a friend over to watch the Cavs/Raps game. He brings over a 4 pack of beer. He puts it in the fridge and I suggest to drink mine because it's already cold. So we polish of 4 each of my beer and decide to go play pool since the game was over. We decide to leave his beer there so when we're done we can have night cap beers when we get home. We go to the pool hall, which I pay, I buy us 3 rounds and he bought none. We finish up and head back to my house. By then we're cashed and don't feel like having another one. I call it a night and my buddy does too, takes off to go home. Next morning I look in the fridge and he took his beer with him.

Now I don't feel obligated to his beer, but wouldn't it be a good gesture to leave the beer behind as a thank you for your hospitality? Or even as a gift offering when you come over like a bottle of wine? Thoughts?
Looking at the situation, looks like you're both pretty buzzed by the end of the night. He might not be exercising the best judgment right then. Just ask him about it. He might apologize and said he wasn't thinking straight or he wanted to drink more at home.

If it's indeed an intentional cheap move, and if this is a good buddy, you might have to educate him on that. Good friends are worth the extra effort.

Otherwise...might think about unfriending.

[poido123]

Must have one hella tight schfinkter :eek:


Honestly, that is so bad I'd consider droping the friend. Good friends don't do that.

[Bless Mathews]

Op is a beta bitch with a 2 inch dick.

[Jameerthefear]

Must have one hella tight schfinkter :eek:


Honestly, that is so bad I'd consider droping the friend. Good friends don't do that.
That's because you're a gambling alcoholic Trent. You can't do without your fix.

[Riddler]

Now I don't feel obligated to his beer, but wouldn't it be a good gesture to leave the beer behind as a thank you for your hospitality? Or even as a gift offering when you come over like a bottle of wine?


https://m.popkey.co/e9c714/EJrdY.gif

[Jailblazers7]

I'd never do that but mostly because I'm too lazy to carry that shit home. I can't remember a friend ever doing that but I honestly wouldn't care. It's kind of shitty but not really a big deal imo. I have friends leave their beer here all the time and I would rather them just take it because I usually don't want it.

The not buying a round thing is a shittier move for me.

[G-train]

The beer should stay unless you go and get it out of the fridge and say 'please take your beer, I dont mind'

[poido123]

That's because you're a gambling alcoholic Trent. You can't do without your fix.


It's ok jameer, you are only 18.

We understand if you take your beer with you

[Hawker]

I would've called the guy out at the bar...hey man, its your round, get me a _________.

[KiiiiNG]

OP is 40 and still hangs around pond-scum losers :oldlol:

No, taking beer back is... :facepalm

Even if you're broke it's not really acceptable. Dude brought a 4 pack?! :facepalm :facepalm

**** you op!

[highwhey]

I would've called the guy out at the bar...hey man, its your round, get me a _________.
He comes back with PBR :lol

[highwhey]

Oh man. You definitely need to drop that friend. Set the tone RIGHT NOW for that mfer. If you don't, chances are he will lose you and other friends, as well as other potential friends. He really lowered the bar there. It sucks, people like that exist.

Just yesterday, I tried avoiding a friend. I'm pretty much his only real guy friend. He begs to come over. I told him I had things to do, another time. He forces his away to tag along. I then told him I cancelled so he can come over. He then attempts to invite a friend over (his girl best friend who I don't find attractive at all one, and two, without my permission) jokingly. And two days in a row, I have to drop him home. He just sits there pretending to miss his train the first day, and I offer to take him home. Yesterday, I was pretty much obligated to take him home. The train station is one block away from my house. It's also stupid because it's about 5-6 stops to his house.

Pisses me off. If you're coming over to my house, especially when you invite yourself over, make sure you know how you're getting home. I'm setting the tone now for his ass.

Edit: Keep in mind. This "friend" is my age. He has his "own" house, rents it and lives with his parents. His parents have "three" houses. And they also have "property" in other states. But he's known to be very cheap. He can't afford to do this, or that. His girlfriend of three years recently broke up with him. She lived about 10 miles away. I asked how often they seen each other, it was once a week or every two weeks. He couldn't even pick her up. He has a BMW 5 series. He tells HER to take the train to see him, to which he'd then drop her home at least. He also has a great job. He doesn't pay bills. He's the only kid. How can someone be so cheap?

Crazy.
What kind of weirdos do u hang with my dude?

[Draz]

What kind of weirdos do u hang with my dude?
He's attached to me specifically because we're the same race. We get along a lot but he just constantly brags about his job and this and that. I just get fed up with it.

[fiddy]

I get the feeling that OP hangs with looser/trashy people

like that other messy guy that stayed for a while at his place or another instance where someone took his expensive glasses. wtf op

[IcanzIIravor]

That's pretty cheap. I'd invite him over again and demand the next time drinks on him

This is the correct course. Don't call your cheap friend out, but next go the alcohol is on him. You have to be careful though. He seems like the type who 'accidentally' forgets to bring his wallet when you go out to eat.

[TheReal Kendall]

Honestly I don't see the problem here. If it's a full pack I probably would've took it or just taken half with me.

Like if it's a special occasion like a b day I would just give them their own bottle. I mainly drink liquor and I've brought a bottle over before just athe a regular gathering and took it back with me.

But if we are close friends and I'm always over your place then I would leave it for next time I come over.

I honestly see a lot of dudes and girls do this often at functions. What makes me mad is when they come over and eat up all the bbq then leave and take their bottle with them.

[IcanzIIravor]

Honestly I don't see the problem here. If it's a full pack I probably would've took it or just taken half with me.

Like if it's a special occasion like a b day I would just give them their own bottle. I mainly drink liquor and I've brought a bottle over before just athe a regular gathering and took it back with me.

But if we are close friends and I'm always over your place then I would leave it for next time I come over.

I honestly see a lot of dudes and girls do this often at functions. What makes me mad is when they come over and eat up all the bbq then leave and take their bottle with them.

My problem is he drank his boys alcohol. If you want to take your own alcohol home, then you should only be drinking yours. Once you start drinking the home owners stuff then the correct thing is to then drink up your own or leave it behind.

[Draz]

Once you have an event, you bring things over, you aren't supposed to take it back. What kind of fckery is that? That's the most disrespectful thing you can do. Especially if your service, drinks, meals, or any expenses are being covered in any way.

All in all, don't end your friendship, but feel him out. If he does it again, it's clear he's not someone you hang out with him. He's someone you use at a network and a conversation.

[Levity]

ive read so many replies in here that said drop that friend. :lol

you guys are dropping friends over a 4 pack of beer? lulz

[West-Side]

Uhm no, who the **** does that?
You're a guest, your buddy opened his home for a party and the least you can do is repay him by bringing some booze for the party. I hate those ghetto as people who literally think "BYOB" is what means. To me, it means you bring booze for yourself so you don't take others, but after the party only welfare bums or really cheap people actually have the nerve to take back their leftover booze.

[TheReal Kendall]

Uhm no, who the **** does that?
You're a guest, your buddy opened his home for a party and the least you can do is repay him by bringing some booze for the party. I hate those ghetto as people who literally think "BYOB" is what means. To me, it means you bring booze for yourself so you don't take others, but after the party only welfare bums or really cheap people actually have the nerve to take back their leftover booze.

If you bringing it for yourself then it's yours to take home with you.

[LJJ]

I wouldn't think anything of it. Probably he was a little drunk and actually did want to finish the night with a few more beers while you were ready to go to sleep, so why not help himself to the cold beer he brought that's left over?

I wouldn't assume he took the beer out of sheer stinginess. If he's always stingy and he never lets you eat/drink on his dime, obviously that's a different story. But a four pack one time? C'mon bruh.

[West-Side]

If you bringing it for yourself then it's yours to take home with you.

I agree, but depending on the situation. Like if it's a birthday party for my friend, or a house warming party etc. I'd leave my booze there. It just makes you look cheap and inconsiderate. If your boy has a house party and tells you to bring whatever you would like to drink for yourself, then taking home your bottle or beers is okay. I personally buy enough drinks I know I'll finish or I know will get finished so I honestly never bothered to take my booze back. Countless times I had 5-6 Heineiken's in my buddies fridge and I just say "keep em". But I don't drink a lot and I'm a social drinker, so there's no point of taking them back. I won't drink them unless I go to the next house party. I guess things like this I consider pity. I can understand bringing a TM of grey goose and there's still 75% of bottle left, or 24 case that still has 17 beers in it. But trying to grab your last 3-4 beers or leftover of Vodka just makes you look like a shitty guest. Just my opinion.

[West-Side]

I wouldn't think anything of it. Probably he was a little drunk and actually did want to finish the night with a few more beers while you were ready to go to sleep, so why not help himself to the cold beer he brought that's left over?

I wouldn't assume he took the beer out of sheer stinginess. If he's always stingy and he never lets you eat/drink on his dime, obviously that's a different story. But a four pack one time? C'mon bruh.

That's completely different. If you are still trying to party and your boy is off to bed, or even if you just change scenery and go to the next party, then obviously it's cool to take your beers.

I was talking more about a situation where the party is over, you're tired and buzzed and the only reason you'd bother to take 3-4 beers back home is to save money after your friend threw the party at his home, I think that's just stingy. Especially when you're the dude that dont ever share.

[hateraid]

I wouldn't think anything of it. Probably he was a little drunk and actually did want to finish the night with a few more beers while you were ready to go to sleep, so why not help himself to the cold beer he brought that's left over?

I wouldn't assume he took the beer out of sheer stinginess. If he's always stingy and he never lets you eat/drink on his dime, obviously that's a different story. But a four pack one time? C'mon bruh.

That's exactly it. It's a only 4 pack. Just leave it saying thanks for the hospitality.

But if someone wanted to continue the night don't you think it's out of courtesy to ask at least? Say, "hey bro, I'm gonna have a night cap. Mind if I take this home?" Like I said, I'd still think he was cheap, but at least he asked.

[Dr Seuss]

. It's a only 4 pack.

yet, you make a deal about it. that kinda works both ways




But if someone wanted to continue the night don't you think it's out of courtesy to ask at least? Say, "hey bro, I'm gonna have a night cap. Mind if I take this home?" Like I said, I'd still think he was cheap, but at least he asked.

believe me, if your friends realized how much of a low key whiner you were, theyd definitely ask next time

[hateraid]

:lol
I love how there's always the few that try and flip the script and pawn this one off on me. You can't ask a question on here without at least one of those types.

I was being generous and cheap friend takes his beer back after he got drunk off my money. I wasn't even mad about it. Yup, that's on me!

[TheReal Kendall]

That's exactly it. It's a only 4 pack. Just leave it saying thanks for the hospitality.

But if someone wanted to continue the night don't you think it's out of courtesy to ask at least? Say, "hey bro, I'm gonna have a night cap. Mind if I take this home?" Like I said, I'd still think he was cheap, but at least he asked.

I get what you saying and like dude above said it can go both ways.

Why would he feel the need to ask though if he bought them? You kinda seem a bit upset about it too.

Like you woke up looking for cold one the next day

[Dr Seuss]

im not pawning anything off on you. im just making a point that you come off as cheap as your friend, whether you realize it or not.

if retaining beer at the end of the night was such as issue for you, why didnt you insist on drinking his beer first? i basically lived in the go-to party house my early 20s, so wed have people over all the time. bringing beer, drinking our beer. not once did i ever think, man i wish that son of a bitch left his beer. and there were plenty of times friends left with half a rack of a 30 pack left.

if you dont send YOUR clear ground rules for gatherings you host, dont expect anyone to take your awkward social cues. if you dont want this to ever happen again, you have to address it with you friend. but you wont, because lets be honest, whining about a 4 pack sound like something a 19 yo would do

[hateraid]

I get what you saying and like dude above said it can go both ways.

Why would he feel the need to ask though if he bought them? You kinda seem a bit upset about it too.

Like you woke up looking for cold one the next day
I wasn't upset. Just a little disappointed. I was just thinking, "wow, he finished all my beers and couldn't even leave a parting gift." I thought it's just courtesy. If I was upset I'd call him out the very next day for being a cheap ass. I think more posters are more upset about it than me.

If I was the guest I'd at least be conscious of the fact that I didn't spend a dime. But that's just me. Sure, different scenarios are different. But in this case I thought a thank you gesture was in order.

[West-Side]

im not pawning anything off on you. im just making a point that you come off as cheap as your friend, whether you realize it or not.

if retaining beer at the end of the night was such as issue for you, why didnt you insist on drinking his beer first? i basically lived in the go-to party house my early 20s, so wed have people over all the time. bringing beer, drinking our beer. not once did i ever think, man i wish that son of a bitch left his beer. and there were plenty of times friends left with half a rack of a 30 pack left.

if you dont send YOUR clear ground rules for gatherings you host, dont expect anyone to take your awkward social cues. if you dont want this to ever happen again, you have to address it with you friend. but you wont, because lets be honest, whining about a 4 pack sound like something a 19 yo would do

Are you guys illiterate?
What part of the guy's original post don't you understand? He's upset his "friend" had the nerve to come to his house, drink his beer and also gets beers paid for him at a bar, then proceeds to have the nerve to take his 4 beers back. That's not even a friend honestly. I can't believe some of you are actually trying to make him look like a cheap skate. This guy seems like a great friend and generous. I always go 50/50 with my friends, I hate cheap people and inconsiderate people.

Hateraid, don't listen to these dudes. It's funny how they are pulling a guilt trip on you. Probably the same cheap skate phony ass friends like your pal. Trust me I had "friends" like that, that I got rid of real quick. I am a generous person and I have friends who work minimum wage jobs, who I know can't afford to waste 100 bucks at a bar. So I have no problem with buying them drinks. The only thing I can't tolerate is them expecting me too. My friends are very insisted on me not spending money on them so I have no problem with buying them a drink or two; however, I get rid of people real quick if they just expect shit and never give anything back. Sounds a lot like your buddy.

[hateraid]

im not pawning anything off on you. im just making a point that you come off as cheap as your friend, whether you realize it or not.

if retaining beer at the end of the night was such as issue for you, why didnt you insist on drinking his beer first? i basically lived in the go-to party house my early 20s, so wed have people over all the time. bringing beer, drinking our beer. not once did i ever think, man i wish that son of a bitch left his beer. and there were plenty of times friends left with half a rack of a 30 pack left.

if you dont send YOUR clear ground rules for gatherings you host, dont expect anyone to take your awkward social cues. if you dont want this to ever happen again, you have to address it with you friend. but you wont, because lets be honest, whining about a 4 pack sound like something a 19 yo would do

Well it's not about the 4 pack, it's the principle. You obviously look at it differently. Again, every scenario is different. I respect how you feel about it, but there are others who feel the same way I do. Does that make them whiners as well? I wasn't even upset. I had a scenario to coincide with my question, I shared it, and waited for peoples POV. If I was cheap about it I would call him out. I'll play it out, but if we do hang out I'll just asked," Hey I got last time, you got it this time?" And if he cheaps out then I'll be a little more conscious of my generosity

[TheReal Kendall]

I'm not trying to make him feel bad just trying to give him a different perspective.

When we go out we take turns on the rounds unless someone is broke. This honestly should be a given. Like you and your friend have a different set of rules from each other obviously.

But I wouldn't confront him over 4 beers. When yall was at the bar you should have told him to buy his own or take turns.

Just wait to see if he do anything else shady before saying anything

[hateraid]

Are you guys illiterate?
What part of the guy's original post don't you understand? He's upset his "friend" had the nerve to come to his house, drink his beer and also gets beers paid for him at a bar, then proceeds to have the nerve to take his 4 beers back. That's not even a friend honestly. I can't believe some of you are actually trying to make him look like a cheap skate. This guy seems like a great friend and generous. I always go 50/50 with my friends, I hate cheap people and inconsiderate people.

Hateraid, don't listen to these dudes. It's funny how they are pulling a guilt trip on you. Probably the same cheap skate phony ass friends like your pal. Trust me I had "friends" like that, that I got rid of real quick. I am a generous person and I have friends who work minimum wage jobs, who I know can't afford to waste 100 bucks at a bar. So I have no problem with buying them drinks. The only thing I can't tolerate is them expecting me too. My friends are very insisted on me not spending money on them so I have no problem with buying them a drink or two; however, I get rid of people real quick if they just expect shit and never give anything back. Sounds a lot like your buddy.

I think the principle point was missed. People look at it like,"it's only beer, why are you so mad?" It's not the beer, it's taking advantage of the situation. If I was mad I would longer be friends with the guy. But I gotta look out, because when you're getting taken advantage of, it usually happens again.

But yes, if people look at it as it's only beer, nothing to lose sleep over, then they're entitled to that. I guess there are some who get overly defensive about it and over react. :lol

[hateraid]

I'm not trying to make him feel bad just trying to give him a different perspective.

When we go out we take turns on the rounds unless someone is broke. This honestly should be a given. Like you and your friend have a different set of rules from each other obviously.

But I wouldn't confront him over 4 beers. When yall was at the bar you should have told him to buy his own or take turns.

Just wait to see if he do anything else shady before saying anything


Well let's just take my example out. Could you feel OK about yourself being a guest in someone's house, drinking all their beer, having your night paid for, and then sneak out with your beer which was intended to share with your friend?

[West-Side]

I'm not trying to make him feel bad just trying to give him a different perspective.

When we go out we take turns on the rounds unless someone is broke. This honestly should be a given. Like you and your friend have a different set of rules from each other obviously.

But I wouldn't confront him over 4 beers. When yall was at the bar you should have told him to buy his own or take turns.

Just wait to see if he do anything else shady before saying anything

Bro, you're absolutely right.
If his friend does treat him to beers and buys him drinks, then he is in the wrong. But he didn't mention that, so I'm assuming (because he's disappointed in him) that his friend rarely returns the favor.

I'm just giving my opinion based on the facts mentioned in the original post.

[oarabbus]

im not pawning anything off on you. im just making a point that you come off as cheap as your friend, whether you realize it or not.

if retaining beer at the end of the night was such as issue for you, why didnt you insist on drinking his beer first? i basically lived in the go-to party house my early 20s, so wed have people over all the time. bringing beer, drinking our beer. not once did i ever think, man i wish that son of a bitch left his beer. and there were plenty of times friends left with half a rack of a 30 pack left.

if you dont send YOUR clear ground rules for gatherings you host, dont expect anyone to take your awkward social cues. if you dont want this to ever happen again, you have to address it with you friend. but you wont, because lets be honest, whining about a 4 pack sound like something a 19 yo would do

You're way off on this one. He doesn't come off cheap at all, he even said he doesnt care it's more about the gesture than the beers themselves.


Well it's not about the 4 pack, it's the principle. You obviously look at it differently. Again, every scenario is different. I respect how you feel about it, but there are others who feel the same way I do. Does that make them whiners as well? I wasn't even upset. I had a scenario to coincide with my question, I shared it, and waited for peoples POV. If I was cheap about it I would call him out. I'll play it out, but if we do hang out I'll just asked," Hey I got last time, you got it this time?" And if he cheaps out then I'll be a little more conscious of my generosity


Your friend is a douche. He should have left the 4 pack.

Here's my rule. If I bring a 6 pack to someone's house, I'll leave it - even if no beers in it were touched. It's kind of a "thanks for having me, have these beers on me" type mentality. Generally I'd leave wine or hard alcohol at someone's house as well, but I don't buy nice $50+ bottles of wine/hard A so maybe it's different for the high rollers out there on that.

However, if I bring a 12 (or larger amount) rack, and half or more is left over, I'll take em back. I wouldn't feel bad to take home an 18 pack where 11 bottles are left over.

But your friend is a douche, especially considering that you drank all your beer and he took back the 4 pack.

[NBAplayoffs2001]

Over the weekend I invited a friend over to watch the Cavs/Raps game. He brings over a 4 pack of beer. He puts it in the fridge and I suggest to drink mine because it's already cold. So we polish of 4 each of my beer and decide to go play pool since the game was over. We decide to leave his beer there so when we're done we can have night cap beers when we get home. We go to the pool hall, which I pay, I buy us 3 rounds and he bought none. We finish up and head back to my house. By then we're cashed and don't feel like having another one. I call it a night and my buddy does too, takes off to go home. Next morning I look in the fridge and he took his beer with him.

Now I don't feel obligated to his beer, but wouldn't it be a good gesture to leave the beer behind as a thank you for your hospitality? Or even as a gift offering when you come over like a bottle of wine? Thoughts?

If this is college, I would ask him to at least split the 3rd round. Still getting used to this real life etiquette lmao :confusedshrug:

[Milbuck]

It's a f*cking 4 pack, he should've left it. I don't think it's a huge deal but I get why you're at least thinking about it considering he drank on your money all night, and again, it's a f*cking 4 pack.

Idk why you'd buy all the rounds though, I sure as hell wouldn't. After two I'm out, someone else is pitching in.

[Dresta]

im not pawning anything off on you. im just making a point that you come off as cheap as your friend, whether you realize it or not.

if retaining beer at the end of the night was such as issue for you, why didnt you insist on drinking his beer first? i basically lived in the go-to party house my early 20s, so wed have people over all the time. bringing beer, drinking our beer. not once did i ever think, man i wish that son of a bitch left his beer. and there were plenty of times friends left with half a rack of a 30 pack left.

if you dont send YOUR clear ground rules for gatherings you host, dont expect anyone to take your awkward social cues. if you dont want this to ever happen again, you have to address it with you friend. but you wont, because lets be honest, whining about a 4 pack sound like something a 19 yo would do
This is really lame. There should be some reciprocity and awareness between friends, without the need to set "ground tules" over a drinking bout. Anyone that isn't a dick would be very aware that a person has been paying for their drinks all night, and therefore would not take their own 4 pack home on the sly, if they're capable of showing any gratitude or consideration whatsoever.

[Derka]

If I bring a six pack of something good over and don't drink it all, I usually leave one or two behind as a "here, drink this because its great" gesture. I have some friends who will see it and drink it, I have some friends who will let it sit there until we're all over there again and I have yet some other friends who don't want you cluttering up their fridge. Depends on the friend.

[NBAplayoffs2001]

Rounds can be awkward though if you got to different bars/lounges that are cheap/expensive. My friend once covered at the high end bars and I often covered twice the amount of rounds at the cheap ones to make it fair.

[warriorfan]

alphas dont bring anything and when you leave take all of the drink

[NumberSix]

Over the weekend I invited a friend over to watch the Cavs/Raps game. He brings over a 4 pack of beer. He puts it in the fridge and I suggest to drink mine because it's already cold. So we polish of 4 each of my beer and decide to go play pool since the game was over. We decide to leave his beer there so when we're done we can have night cap beers when we get home. We go to the pool hall, which I pay, I buy us 3 rounds and he bought none. We finish up and head back to my house. By then we're cashed and don't feel like having another one. I call it a night and my buddy does too, takes off to go home. Next morning I look in the fridge and he took his beer with him.

Now I don't feel obligated to his beer, but wouldn't it be a good gesture to leave the beer behind as a thank you for your hospitality? Or even as a gift offering when you come over like a bottle of wine? Thoughts?
Sooooo.... You were drinking and driving?

[plowking]

Beer I never bother with. Friends at times have even said to take it, but I dunno, too much of a hassle actually bothering to do it.

Unless it is a nice bottle of something I don't bother. Even then I generally leave it, since I usually drink with the same people, and they're good enough to leave it for next time we catch up.

[hateraid]

Sooooo.... You were drinking and driving?

Lol, after reading through that, that was your concern?
I don't drink and drive. My career requires I have a licence as I'm paid to drive to see accounts. My automobile and all the expenses are paid for through my company. A cab ride to any of my destinations is no more that $15. So why would I risk my career?

[ace23]

Hateraid you post a lot of weird social interactions. You have some weird friends.
He starts threads about the most inane everyday social interactions. It's strange to me that he thinks about these things so much as a 40 year old with a family. :lol