Bible Shit

[DoctorP]

Jesus was magic and was also the best part of the bible.

Top 4 stories:
1. New Testament
2. Genesis
3. Exodus
4. Noah (oops, that's genesis)

the rest is mostly trash

honorable mentions: Samson, David v Goliath

https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/6100KC39QBL.jpg

I'd totally bang prime Silverman

[Patrick Chewing]

Quality thread, OP. Thanks for sharing your opinion.

[DoctorP]

Quality thread, OP. Thanks for sharing your opinion.

You got it, Chew!! :lol

[DoctorP]

oooh, what is this?...

https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/A1yd8w+B8tL.jpg

[DoctorP]

wtf is this? hmmm

https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/2803/6230/products/57_b6c6385d-30c9-4d48-92f1-3612cbb69adb_1024x1024@2x.jpg

[DoctorP]

interesting...

https://www.weiserantiquarian.com/pictures/medium/63180.jpg

[LoneyROY7]

The one about my man JESUS.

https://akm-img-a-in.tosshub.com/indiatoday/images/story/201512/jesus-facebook-and-storysize_647_121515020015.jpg

[DoctorP]

https://www.luckymojo.com/moses-candle-label.jpg


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OcRt3YUbN0k

[Manny98]

The one God literally drowned a bunch of innocent people for little to no reason

[Stanley Kobrick]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4StfLdvVvO0

[SouBeachTalents]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ERUngQUCsyE

[Bimbo Coles]

https://i.makeagif.com/media/1-09-2017/q-Wk2-.gif (/gif/meryl-streep-speech-the-golden-globes-2017-q-Wk2-)

[DoctorP]

The one God literally drowned a bunch of innocent people for little to no reason

:lol

yup. But promised never to do it again!!

[HylianNightmare]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ERUngQUCsyE

Shits gold

[CelticBaller]

Who would win in a one on one? Moses or Post baptism Jesus?

[DoctorP]

Who would win in a one on one? Moses or Post baptism Jesus?

Moses would win by decision. Jesus wouldnt fight back and Moses would keep pounding him with commandment stones but it wouldn't hurt Jesus at all.

CELEBRITY FIGHT CLUB

[JEFFERSON MONEY]

You people need to stop mocking sacred things.

It is really not remotely funny, and there are severe repercussions for it.

You all who are engaging in this behavior are destroying your souls.

[DoctorP]

You people need to stop mocking sacred things.

It is really not remotely funny, and there are severe repercussions for it.

You all who are engaging in this behavior are destroying your souls.

IS this about LeBran?

[DoctorP]

thanks for passing through, Jefferson Money


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8WdoyVjYvIw

[JEFFERSON MONEY]

And stop this talk about Moses vs. Jesus---instead appreciate the fact that all the Anbiya (Prophets) were sent to mankind to call people to worship The One True God, Allah (SWT) alone.

[DoctorP]

And stop this talk about Moses vs. Jesus---instead appreciate the fact that all the Anbiya (Prophets) were sent to mankind to call people to worship The One True God, Allah (SWT) alone.

cool story bro

[DoctorP]

And stop this talk about Moses vs. Jesus---instead appreciate the fact that all the Anbiya (Prophets) were sent to mankind to call people to worship The One True God, Allah (SWT) alone.

you didnt even vote dude wtf

[DoctorP]

And stop this talk about Moses vs. Jesus---instead appreciate the fact that all the Anbiya (Prophets) were sent to mankind to call people to worship The One True God, Allah (SWT) alone.

I don't know much about the Quran but this is interesting



https://sunnah.com/bukhari/56/7
The prophet had lice in his head

https://sunnah.com/bukhari/76/9
The prophet advise to drink camel urine

https://sunnah.com/bukhari/6/8
The prophet had sex during menstrual period

https://sunnah.com/muslim/3/30
He had sex with nine wives using one bath only

https://sunnah.com/bukhari/4/99
His clothes were always covered with ***

https://sunnah.com/bukhari/4/96
The child aisha always cleaned the *** from his clothes

https://sunnah.com/muslim/38/32
The prophet spat in the mouth of a child

https://sunnah.com/muslim/39/92
You must spit three times if you forget quran during prayer

https://sunnah.com/bukhari/8/61
This leads to mosques full of spit

https://sunnah.com/bukhari/4/40
Dogs urinated in the mosque

https://sunnah.com/bukhari/54/19…
The companions washed their faces with the spit of the prophet

https://sunnah.com/muslim/15/347…
You must use an odd number of stones to wipe your ass

https://sunnah.com/bukhari/70/85…
You must lick or get someone to lick your fingers when you finish eating

https://sunnah.com/muslim/43/113…
Companions used the sweat of the prophet as perfume

https://sunnah.com/bukhari/59/12…
If a fly fall in your glass just sink it more

https://sunnah.com/muslim/36/153…
You must not drink while standing and if you do it you must vomit

https://sunnah.com/bukhari/91/5
You must spit three times if you see a bad dream

[DoctorP]

#metoo would definitely be interested in going after Mohammed in today's era

[DoctorP]

Also I'm pretty sure that I remember Noah banged his daughters in a drunken orgy