Have You Ever Gotten Seriously Heartbroken?

[fsvr54]

This is probably the wrong place to post this, but phukk it. It's an interesting conversation and an outlet.

How did you cope/deal with it? How long did the pain last? Did you go full no-contact for good? Did they come back? How did it change you and your approach to relationships going forward? Were you married?

This happened to me a little over a month ago, and it still sucks. I've improved surely, but there's times where it still hits hard. You think you finally found the right person...were together a year.

At 30, I'm at a point where I don't even feel like seeing anyone seriously anymore, it feels so risky. A woman telling you "I love you" has lost meaning. Any little friction and they run, that's not how anything real can ever last...millennials don't want to work through even the slightest issues. My parents have been together my whole life and I saw first-hand what a loving union can get through; it will never be all flowers and rainbows and people have to recognize this.

[highwhey]

This is probably the wrong place to post this, but phukk it. It's an interesting conversation and an outlet.

How did you cope/deal with it? How long did the pain last? Did you go full no-contact for good? Did they come back? How did it change you and your approach to relationships going forward? Were you married?

This happened to me a little over a month ago, and it still sucks. I've improved surely, but there's times where it still hits hard. You think you finally found the right person...were together a year.

At 30, I'm at a point where I don't even feel like seeing anyone seriously anymore, it feels so risky. A woman telling you "I love you" has lost meaning. Any little friction and they run, that's not how anything real can ever last...millennials don't want to work through even the slightest issues. My parents have been together my whole life and I saw first-hand what a loving union can get through; it will never be all flowers and rainbows and people have to recognize this.

i'm 29 and i feel the same way about the dating scene, but there are women out there in our age range that are looking to be serious and not just a casual hookup, they are the minority however.

you're right, for the most part women in our age bracket are not looking for any commitment and will flee at the sight of anything that makes them feel uncomfortable. sticking it out should be a good indicator of someone worth pursuing though. if they don't want to be vulnerable, you won't ever develop a meaningful relationship with that person. that's such a fundamental component of any relationship.

you're probably going to want to talk to women that grew up in a stable household and have parents that are still together.

[Doomsday Dallas]

This happened to me a little over a month ago, and it still sucks. I've improved surely, but there's times where it still hits hard. You think you finally found the right person...were together a year.



If you don't have kids with this woman, don't have the same mutual life long friends, and you don't work with her.... you should be fine, and you should absolutely go no contact.

[Doomsday Dallas]

It's really hard to give advice about heartbreak... everybody's situation is completely different.

I've had it 3 or 4 times, and it can f*ck you up good if you let it.

I'll say this... today when I look back at all the times I was heartbroken I can honestly say I was being a little bitch about it,... so really the only advice I can offer is to man up & move on.


there are good youtube videos out there that can be helpful:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c709rGYW8v0

[SouBeachTalents]

Time heals all wounds. No matter how devastating a relationship ending may be, give it enough time and the pain eventually subsides.

The more depressing aspect of a break up to me would be entering the bleak dating world. The majority of the good options are already off the market, and the competition for even the most marginally good looking ones is absolutely ridiculous.

I agree with what the other posters in this thread have said that in this day and age, people will run at the first sign of trouble in a relationship, men and women alike. Idk if it's due to unrealistic expectations from movies, the facade of the "happy" couples all posting their wonderful moments online, or the insanely easy access to countless dating apps where you can find somebody else in an instant. In regards to the latter, I guess when you have so many options at your fingertips, you're much less likely to work through that problems that will arise in every relationship.

[Chick Stern]

If you are sad, that means she initiated the break up.
It means she is likely already on another guys jock.
There is nothing good from being “friends” for you. She would just want to see that you are broke up over her.
She’s going to be more interested if you ignore her.
Move on. Go out and get some rebound tail.
Find a Halloween party with some slutty costume women attending.

Leykis 101
Rules ALL men should live by:

- NEVER, and I mean EVER...date a single mother.
- Follow the "three strikes and your out" rule. Which means if he/she hasn't put out in the first three dates, dump them.
- Never pick up your phone Friday through Sunday. Screen all of your phone calls.
- No cuddling after sex. You kick their *** out in time for Sportscenter.
- Always wear a condom. Even if she is on birth control. No exceptions.
- Never spend more than $40 on a date. And if she pays, all the better.
- Pick out the women with the lowest self esteem. The lower the better. Beautiful women normally have a very low self esteem.
- Get in touch with your "inner A-hole". Women are drawn to ********. If your a nice guy(*****), you won't get laid. She'll categorize you as her "friend".
- Women are attention ****** and will do almost anything to get it. So keep that in mind when you see some woman dressed to kill.
- Men, never have coffee or lunch with a woman unless you want to be "friends". Women have dinner with the men that they bang, not lunch or coffee.
- Women, you have no male friends. Every male you call a friend wants to bang the living **** out of you. If you don't believe me, then as a test...tell any one of your male friends that you want to sleep with them and see if they turn you down.
- Stay away from any women who says the words "All my friends are guys". That is trouble and should be avoided at all costs.
- If the person you are dating stops putting out, "Dump that bitch".
- Men, the reason why you are friends with a woman with the exception of having a past relationship with her...is that she doesn't find you attractive. The truth hurts. Move on.
- Men, the more confidence you show the better chances you have of getting the girl. Women smell a *****(figurative term for a man with no self esteem) a mile away and they can also smell confidence. Women are attracted to confidence almost more than anything else.
- Don't ever tell a woman you love her unless you really do. Don't do it especially just to get in her pants. The consequences are many and get you in to big trouble.
- If your girlfriend or boyfriend is spending a lot of time with a "friend" of the opposite sex, dump that bitch.
- Do not get married until you are at least 25 years of age.
- Do not buy her flowers until the second year you are married.
- Don't do anything in the beginning of the relationship you wouldn't normally do later in the relationship. Because her expectations of anything you do for her will cause you problems later.
- Never hold her purse. Unless you are a ***** or have a *****, you shouldn't be holding a purse.
- Always become unavailable during the holidays. Never pick up the phone close to holiday seasons. Especially Valentine's Day or Thanksgiving.
- Do not go to a concert with a woman if she invites you. Especially if she has backstage passes or has a friend in the band she is going to see. It just means she is there to **** the other guy. She probably just used you for the ride there.
- Never buy a woman a drink. It's just another way of a woman getting something she wants for free while the man thinks she's interested in him. (applies outside of relationships)
* Eat before you go out on a date. Purpose is that a woman normally wouldn't be caught dead eating more than her date. So this results in a lower costing date by the end of the evening. You tell her that you are trying to eat healthy.
* Do not order a bottle of wine. And the reason you don't when she asks is because you want to make sure you get her home safely. And to ensure this to the best of your ability, you don't want to drink any alcohol.
* If your date picks up their cell phone, silently get up and drive off without them. If they wouldn't give you the lack of respect to pay attention to you on the date, you don't give them the respect of driving them home.

[SATAN]

I'll say this... today when I look back at all the times I was heartbroken I can honestly say I was being a little bitch about it,... so really the only advice I can offer is to man up & move on.




Sums it up. She probably already has your replacement in mind or is out looking for him. Stop wasting your time obsessing over her. It's been a month. Enjoy your life.

[Stephonit]

Everything you need to know about life you learned in kindergarten.

[Axe]

About a long-time crush since teenager days, yes.

[Kobe_Bryant]

it only happens when you're a kid. after the 3rd or 4th girl sleeps with you and gives you an inflated ego because you no longer have a need of approval you start to only think of women as objects and partners. love is just your own insecurities showing. that's why the people who are most obsessed are jealous types. that feeling you get in your stomach is just your body telling you that you're a *****. it can come back later on in life if you're ever rejected because you begin to have self doubt. its why some couples force themselves to fight and women start useless arguments. they read in magazines that fighting helps build a relationship. but it only works if the guys a moma s boy. if he spites his mother and doesn't trust women because he had a deadbeat dad growing up then he will be driven away by fighting. it turns them off.

that's why things become boring over time. some men never recover from rejection or loss but you immediately forget about the woman prior. some guys take 2 years to move on cause they never go after a new woman. these guys become incels and let themselves get fat and ugly. and some guys end up going on a killing spree like Elliot Rodger because they never get that need of approval. but if he just got laid a few times he wouldn't be so angry with women and question himself. love isn't real. it's an endorphin. and even with all the best fights and jealousy it will eventually end after a few years because like any drug the body becomes used to it. the older you get the more you become addicted to porn and less likely to chase after women. I believe a healthy supply of testosterone supplements can help keep that desire strong. most men dont know that they're slowly turning into females over time. it's mother nature telling us that we shouldn't have kids anymore. don't let this happen. order a supplement kit today or you're gonna end up just jacking off your limp dick to porn every day after the age of 30. or cheating on your wife for needed extra excitement to get stimulated

[Manny98]

Nope never even been in love with someone yet

[j3lademaster]

Nope never even been in love with someone yetyou were a very mature teenager then. When I first started dating as a teenager I thought I was “in love” literally every time until I actually figured shit out.

[highwhey]

Patrick Chewing was quite sad when he heard the news about twinkies would no longer be made.

[j3lademaster]

Patrick Chewing was quite sad when he heard the news about twinkies would no longer be made.twinkies are overrated. The rice crispy with the chocolate and caramel, the oatmeal cookie sandwich with the… were they marshmallows in the middle, and zebra cakes are way better.

[highwhey]

twinkies are overrated. The rice crispy with the chocolate and caramel, the oatmeal cookie sandwich with the… were they marshmallows in the middle, and zebra cakes are way better.
Interesting. I will pass this information to the Fat boy patrickchewing.

[highwhey]

Real talk tho, after you’ve spent a while not dating anyone seriously, you start to get accustomed and enjoy your independence. My married buddies have to talk to their ladies to go out or whatever. I’m free to go buy a ticket and go to Pittsburgh to my favorite restaurant in the whole world without asking anyone’s permission. I can go wherever the hell I want to.

[Patrick Chewing]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c709rGYW8v0

This video is true. You're only fooling yourself if you believe the person you loved was the person you thought they were. They were lying to you. You were lying to yourself. And that person will never be the person you thought they were or wanted them to be. So the search for that person must go on.


No ex is going to wake up one day and realize she was wrong and you were right and will come groveling back for forgiveness. Right now your ex is thinking you're the worst piece of shit alive, and she is hating you every second for it. People don't change. Personalities don't change. I once got back with an ex after being separated for 10 years...yep, 10 years, and we moved in together and were trying to have a baby and talking about marriage, and within two months it went back to the same way it was when we broke up the first time. Crazy to think how ****ed I would be if I had gotten her pregnant.

I think the older I get, the more I just want to date random bitches and not get back with anyone full time. Living alone and getting to do whatever the **** I want is an amazing feeling.

[Off the Court]

This video is true. You're only fooling yourself if you believe the person you loved was the person you thought they were. They were lying to you. You were lying to yourself. And that person will never be the person you thought they were or wanted them to be. So the search for that person must go on.


No ex is going to wake up one day and realize she was wrong and you were right and will come groveling back for forgiveness. Right now your ex is thinking you're the worst piece of shit alive, and she is hating you every second for it. People don't change. Personalities don't change. I once got back with an ex after being separated for 10 years...yep, 10 years, and we moved in together and were trying to have a baby and talking about marriage, and within two months it went back to the same way it was when we broke up the first time. Crazy to think how ****ed I would be if I had gotten her pregnant.

I think the older I get, the more I just want to date random bitches and not get back with anyone full time. Living alone and getting to do whatever the **** I want is an amazing feeling.
I'm sorry you had to go through that bro it makes me sad. These are heartbreaking times for all of us as we suffer through the tabloid attacks on Matthew Perry.

[fsvr54]

I feel all of y'all for sure. I'm definitely not sitting around waiting for her to come back; she's clearly moved on (the breakup was because of mistakes I MADE, that I regret). I just wish I hadn't tweaked my knee going very hard at a basketball workout after the breakup lol, shit's been sore for weeks now.

I just wonder sometimes about the future of families. If everyone is like this, where will the good marriages and families come from? A solid nuclear family is the foundation of a healthy society. I believe in it and one day would like a family of my own. That's what I come from and believe in. It's a beautiful ting, but it comes with a certain amount of sacrifice, which modern people just don't like to do (sacrifice anything).

[Jasper]

Some could say first love , but it was an on again off again relationship for 8 years.
I wanted to marry her , and have kids,, she was the one fuc'ed up more in all most every way.
She had brothers and sisters that experimented with being gay , and she eventually took that route , and never had a solid life.
50's acquired MS became an alcoholic and passed just last year at 61.
I knew she had traveled and lived out in Washington, but when she acquired MS moved to all places my area.
(I had no idea she was even there , and even though I am married , wished she would of reached out to me.)
I suspect she was embarrassed , and for what reason , I will never know , but she was a solid friend and lover at one time.
It is sad.
-------------
Because of this girl , I got into the mode of dumping girls before they considered dumping me .... Maybe because I did not want to get hurt.
Chick Stern - I dated and considered marriage with a single mom , but she was very recluses (But a hell of a fuc k)
My current wife has 4 adult kids, it would of been my fault to pass on such a warm heart woman.

(prior to my marriage I dumped a wonderful woman. to this day I still converse with her. (best fuc k I ever had lol)

[j3lademaster]

I feel all of y'all for sure. I'm definitely not sitting around waiting for her to come back; she's clearly moved on (the breakup was because of mistakes I MADE, that I regret). I just wish I hadn't tweaked my knee going very hard at a basketball workout after the breakup lol, shit's been sore for weeks now.

I just wonder sometimes about the future of families. If everyone is like this, where will the good marriages and families come from? A solid nuclear family is the foundation of a healthy society. I believe in it and one day would like a family of my own. That's what I come from and believe in. It's a beautiful ting, but it comes with a certain amount of sacrifice, which modern people just don't like to do (sacrifice anything).You definitely have the right attitude and the right role models in your parents.

[imdaman99]

Yep. It was messy. I wanted no contact, she missed me too much (yeah I did too lol but I didn't wanna show it). We tried talking and being friends but we knew we couldn't meet again. The feelings would come rushing back way too easily. It got to the point where I talked to her about a girl I thought was cute who lived near me and then she blurted out she f'ed the next guy a week after we broke up. I thought to myself... f this. And then I asked if she could pay me back the money I lent her to pay off college loans. It was $1k. I never got it back and I never will. Cut my losses.

But ball helped me through it. Balled all summer and lo and behold met a cute tibetan girl at my park and we got friendly and all that. I didn't hit it but she was a nice distraction and got over my ex quick. I'm a simple guy, onto the next girl is a good way of getting over a girl, even one I was with for almost 3 years. Find a distraction. You just said you hurt yourself playing ball so I don't envy you :lol good luck bro :cheers:

As for the future... sheesh. Trying to get married and it's 100% fact most of them run at the first sign of discomfort. It's like all they are looking for is red flags. I try to stick out through multiple red flags but yeah I bounce too if I realize she's boring and I'm losing interest. I know good girls are out there, I messed up with a couple of them that I wish I could go back and fix. They are married and prob unhappily ever after married, settling with shrek looking dudes with money.

[Chick Stern]

Some could say first love , but it was an on again off again relationship for 8 years.
I wanted to marry her , and have kids,, she was the one fuc'ed up more in all most every way.
She had brothers and sisters that experimented with being gay , and she eventually took that route , and never had a solid life.
50's acquired MS became an alcoholic and passed just last year at 61.
I knew she had traveled and lived out in Washington, but when she acquired MS moved to all places my area.
(I had no idea she was even there , and even though I am married , wished she would of reached out to me.)
I suspect she was embarrassed , and for what reason , I will never know , but she was a solid friend and lover at one time.
It is sad.
-------------
Because of this girl , I got into the mode of dumping girls before they considered dumping me .... Maybe because I did not want to get hurt.
Chick Stern - I dated and considered marriage with a single mom , but she was very recluses (But a hell of a fuc k)
My current wife has 4 adult kids, it would of been my fault to pass on such a warm heart woman.

(prior to my marriage I dumped a wonderful woman. to this day I still converse with her. (best fuc k I ever had lol)
The 101 was posted as a bit of a troll, but there is some truth in it.
The don’t date a single mom is gold, and it’s logical. First off, you’ll never be the number 1 priority, the kid/kids will be (as they should be). She might put herself first or second, leaving you third. Next, if she has already had a kid out of wedlock, there are stronger odds that she’ll do the same to you.

[CelticBaller]

She left me for a drug dealer when I was broke in college lol. She tried to reach out but I was too prideful to talk back to her. I just stayed busy, I focused on school, my part time job and going to the gym and eventually I stopped thinking about her

[Bronbron23]

This is probably the wrong place to post this, but phukk it. It's an interesting conversation and an outlet.

How did you cope/deal with it? How long did the pain last? Did you go full no-contact for good? Did they come back? How did it change you and your approach to relationships going forward? Were you married?

This happened to me a little over a month ago, and it still sucks. I've improved surely, but there's times where it still hits hard. You think you finally found the right person...were together a year.

At 30, I'm at a point where I don't even feel like seeing anyone seriously anymore, it feels so risky. A woman telling you "I love you" has lost meaning. Any little friction and they run, that's not how anything real can ever last...millennials don't want to work through even the slightest issues. My parents have been together my whole life and I saw first-hand what a loving union can get through; it will never be all flowers and rainbows and people have to recognize this.

Don't take this the wrong way. I say this with intent to help but the problem isn't her or what she did to you the problem is within your own mind and how you view women and relationships. Women are human and humans are unpredictable. They change their mind and feelings like the weather. Just because she loved you at some point it dosn't mean she's gonna stay in love with you. Sometimes people's feelings change for whatever reason and they fall out of love. It's not something they do intentionally it just happens. It's like anything. Take a favorite song for instance. At first it's the best thing going but after awhile you get sick of it and you no longer love that song like you first did. If you enter a relationship with this understanding you'll never be blind sided if and when it ends. You won't be angry and hurtful because you understand that it's just her human nature. You won't be upset at her for having human feelings that can change and you won't be mad at yourself because you entered the relationship knowing this truth but you went ahead anyway even though she may one day fall out of love. Your at peace on both ends.

The reason why your hurt and mad at her is because you entered the relationship with a mindset that's opposite of this. You thought that when she said she loved you it meant she'd love you forever so you look at her as a liar instead of a human being who's feelings can change. Don't be mad at her or hate her for leaving. Thank her for the love and time she gave you. Be grateful and happy that you experienced love at all even if it was short lived. Some people never experience that ever. This way instead of parting on a bad note where you think she's a evil lying bitch and she now she thinks your a pathetic needy loser. You instead part on a good note where you think she's still a great girl that dosn't know exactly what she wants yet and she looks at you like a great guy who was cool and understanding.

[fsvr54]

You're right, plenty of truth in there.

Truth is, plenty of chicks have told me they loved me and I never gave a F about them. This was the only one I truly did... we talked about having a family. But I have learned my lessons and I am not mad at her at all. I cherish the memories and the time spent together. I have been getting more and more over it by the day. A study showed that the average American takes 3.5 months to get over serious heartbreak, so I don't feel I'm way off base, these are natural emotions that must be felt and passed.

[Bronbron23]

You're right, plenty of truth in there.

Truth is, plenty of chicks have told me they loved me and I never gave a F about them. This was the only one I truly did... we talked about having a family. But I have learned my lessons and I am not mad at her at all. I cherish the memories and the time spent together. I have been getting more and more over it by the day. A study showed that the average American takes 3.5 months to get over serious heartbreak, so I don't feel I'm way off base, these are natural emotions that must be felt and passed.

Yeah i think a poster on hear said it best when he said time heals all wounds. Some wounds can take longer than others but 3 months isn't that bad.

As far as her being the only girl you loved out of all the ones you've been with that can make it harder because you feel like she's the one. Just remember it may feel like she's the one but really she's one of many. You just haven't met the other ones yet. They're out there though.

[8Ball]

Seriously heart broken? Never.

I've seriously broke a few hearts though.

[Jasper]

I think the older I get, the more I just want to date random bitches and not get back with anyone full time. Living alone and getting to do whatever the **** I want is an amazing feeling.

shows how immature you are.
Random bitches should be a signal to all , what you think of woman.

Getting over the hump and realizing woman are part of the 'other' side of the human race is one thing , but fully understanding they are basically a different species
and 'we' coexist with them is another.

[Patrick Chewing]

shows how immature you are.
Random bitches should be a signal to all , what you think of woman.

Getting over the hump and realizing woman are part of the 'other' side of the human race is one thing , but fully understanding they are basically a different species
and 'we' coexist with them is another.

Old man Jasper. Get off my dick. You're a different generation. Women today are not the submissive type that you're used to. They're psychotic, temperamental. You can't slap them around when they disappoint you like you're used to doing.

[highwhey]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bTxfcINRwXU&list=RDMMbTxfcINRwXU&start_radio=1&ab_channel=djpoolboi

[fsvr54]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RPLOI0PFoF8

[Doomsday Dallas]

This is probably the wrong place to post this, but phukk it. It's an interesting conversation and an outlet.

How did you cope/deal with it? How long did the pain last? Did you go full no-contact for good? Did they come back? How did it change you and your approach to relationships going forward? Were you married?

This happened to me a little over a month ago, and it still sucks. I've improved surely, but there's times where it still hits hard. You think you finally found the right person...were together a year.

At 30, I'm at a point where I don't even feel like seeing anyone seriously anymore, it feels so risky. A woman telling you "I love you" has lost meaning. Any little friction and they run, that's not how anything real can ever last...millennials don't want to work through even the slightest issues. My parents have been together my whole life and I saw first-hand what a loving union can get through; it will never be all flowers and rainbows and people have to recognize this.


Some time has passed fsvr54

feel better? worse? same?

update?



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ByPzzT9ScFA

[fsvr54]

I feel a lot better. I've moved on, it is what it is. With time and self-reflection, a lot of things are realized. Bad experiences only make you stronger in the end. :cheers:

Thanks for checking in, bud.

I'm planning to move to Texas in February actually

[Doomsday Dallas]

I feel a lot better. I've moved on, it is what it is. With time and self-reflection, a lot of things are realized. Bad experiences only make you stronger in the end. :cheers:

Thanks for checking in, bud.

I'm planning to move to Texas in February actually


Well good luck out here bro, the DFW area is the best place in the USA to live in if you ask me, can't imagine living somewhere else, I've tried to imagine, but I still can't see a better place on the USA map to live in.

Enjoy it out here, forgot where you were moving from?

I may have to move to a new place soon also, so not sure how far away I'll be from the city of Dallas, but I'll definitely be in the DFW area, probably for the rest of my life.

change is hard and heartbreak can be some real $hit, remembered this thread from last month, thought I'd say what's up. Glad you're doing better bro, a little time passing always helps.

[fsvr54]

Well good luck out here bro, the DFW area is the best place in the USA to live in if you ask me, can't imagine living somewhere else, I've tried to imagine, but I still can't see a better place on the USA map to live in.

Enjoy it out here, forgot where you were moving from?

I may have to move to a new place soon also, so not sure how far away I'll be from the city of Dallas, but I'll definitely be in the DFW area, probably for the rest of my life.

change is hard and heartbreak can be some real $hit, remembered this thread from last month, thought I'd say what's up. Glad you're doing better bro, a little time passing always helps.

I'm moving from FL. So far I've been looking into San Antonio and Ft Worth. I've been to the former but never the latter. Love the TX mentality and it's a more varied state than I initially thought, geographically. Appreciate it my man.

[GimmeThat]

being deaf, is not a fun game