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-   -   Am I insensative? (http://www.insidehoops.com/forum/showthread.php?t=129946)

hateraid 04-29-2009 10:31 AM

Am I insensative?
 
A week ago my wife's grandmother passed away. She was very close to her although she lives in Seattle. I've met her on several occasions, all very brief and pretty ackward considering she can't speak english. My wife is pretty torn up about this and I'm trying to show support and even bought my mother-in-law flowers. Because I never knew her well I can't really show emotion.
They're flying to Seattle today for the viewing and the funeral. My wife, son and in-laws are going, but I'm staying home. Mostly because I'd feel ackward being around her family and not showing any emotion. Also I committed to having my friends over to watch the Manny Pacquiao fight on Sat.

Am I being insensative? Be honest.

rufuspaul 04-29-2009 10:32 AM

Re: Am I insensative?
 
We all deal with death differently.

QuickTrigger 04-29-2009 10:34 AM

Re: Am I insensative?
 
Didn't you "wife" leave you a long time ago? Why would you go? Get over it.

PK3434 04-29-2009 10:35 AM

Re: Am I insensative?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by hateraid
A week ago my wife's grandmother passed away. She was very close to her although she lives in Seattle. I've met her on several occasions, all very brief and pretty ackward considering she can't speak english. My wife is pretty torn up about this and I'm trying to show support and even bought my mother-in-law flowers. Because I never knew her well I can't really show emotion.
They're flying to Seattle today for the viewing and the funeral. My wife, son and in-laws are going, but I'm staying home. Mostly because I'd feel ackward being around her family and not showing any emotion. Also I committed to having my friends over to watch the Manny Pacquiao fight on Sat.

Am I being insensative? Be honest.


No, I think you are okay. I was very close to my grandparents, but when they died I didn't show much emotion, mostly because I realize that old people tend to die a lot...It is usually their time to go.

bada bing 04-29-2009 10:37 AM

Re: Am I insensative?
 
naaaa.

people expect us to be sensitive about every thing out there and if you dont cry a river these days, they label you as a prick or something. We are surrounded by hallmark cards and the gay generation that is making a guy be a guy harder.

El Kabong 04-29-2009 10:39 AM

Re: Am I insensative?
 
I don't think it's a matter of you not feeling any emotion over it one way or another, but i'm sure your wife expects you to go with her just so you can be supportive and help her through a difficult time.

JEFFERSON MONEY 04-29-2009 10:43 AM

Re: Am I insensative?
 
No you obviously ain't got a good relationship, and who da phuck carez about geyzers their past their prime, just live yo life ayyy keep on gettin ur pay-per (view)

hateraid 04-29-2009 10:55 AM

Re: Am I insensative?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by JEFFERSON MONEY
No you obviously ain't got a good relationship, and who da phuck carez about geyzers their past their prime, just live yo life ayyy keep on gettin ur pay-per (view)


Ouch. Now that's insensative.

BTW, your avy looks like a pen!$ spewing out a dudes mouth. Sick.

JEFFERSON MONEY 04-29-2009 10:56 AM

Re: Am I insensative?
 
It was supposed to be a lesbian kissing gif.

Sh!t messed up. But for real hateraid don't have any guilt. There's no way you could possibly give a f*ck because you two never really sat down and talekd, and this situation calls for a facade of consideration. I'm a very nice person in real life, and my 'rents have forced me to attend funerals about people I've hardly met over the year. It's just boring and unnecessary via Machiavellan perspective.

LJJ 04-29-2009 10:59 AM

Re: Am I insensative?
 
You don't have to moarn when someone you don't care about dies. It's natural, you just didn't know the woman, But you say yourself that your wife is torn up about this and you just need to be with her in times like that.

Watching Manny Pacquiao on TV is not really a good reason to not be there for your wife.

To be honest, I'd be pretty pissed if I had to go to my dad's funeral, and my spouse stays at home because "she wasn't that close to him" and Dancing with the Stars is on this weekend.

JtotheIzzo 04-29-2009 11:07 AM

Re: Am I insensative?
 
not emoting is fine.

skipping a funeral for Pinoy #1's fight, hmm...

rufuspaul 04-29-2009 11:08 AM

Re: Am I insensative?
 
Makes you wonder how many people will be at our own funerals because someone made them go.

boozehound 04-29-2009 11:34 AM

Re: Am I insensative?
 
yeah, thats a pretty dick move. it shouldnt matter if you are uncomfortable or didnt know her. You are there for your wife and the support she needs. and the excuse of the PPV fight? weak. expect divorce papers.

Thorpesaurous 04-29-2009 12:24 PM

Re: Am I insensative?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by boozehound
yeah, thats a pretty dick move. it shouldnt matter if you are uncomfortable or didnt know her. You are there for your wife and the support she needs. and the excuse of the PPV fight? weak. expect divorce papers.


I agree. In fact, the guy who's got enough seperation to not openly mourn provides a service in that he can veer her away from dwelling on stuff and help her get through it.

You really should be there.

Give your buddies the keys to your house, let them come over and watch the fight. Tell em to clean up after. They'll understand.

bigboi_baller 04-29-2009 12:31 PM

Re: Am I insensative?
 
Yes, pretty insensitive. Your wife is obviously going through a tough time and she needs you to support her. I'm sure her family doesn't expect to be sobbing while you are there, seeing as though you didn't really know the woman. Plus, you being in a stable condition could probably help your wife a lot who's probably on an emotional roller coaster right now.

But watching a boxing match with your friends instead of being with your wife during a tought time is going to seem insensitive.


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