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ALBballer 09-28-2006 03:53 PM

OT: Have you ever got caught shoplifting?
When I was in 9th grade I saw a pair of Sony Headphones that I really wanted. I've stolen from this place many times before, so I went into my usual routine. I was looking around, and step by step I was unwrapping the package and stuffing it in my pants. I forgot to mention I was with my little brother at this time, and I told him if I ever got caught he should run, and that's weird b/c I'm usually so cool and calm during the process, but that day I was kinda nervous.

Anyways long story short, I was walking out the door, when I hear this guy say stop, and I did. My brother just stayed at the entrance, and the undercover security guy brought me in the back office. He made me wait in the office for 15 minutes, which btw was terrible. Then this 6'4" black guy came in and was threatening to call the police, and being the bytch that I am, I started crying. I was a minor at the time, so he called my parents and it was pretty embarrassing to say the least Espicially since one of my distant relatives works their, but to this day I'm scared shytless to steal anything from a store.

BTW, my brother just stayed at the entrance the whole time, and we all just left together.

MaxFly 09-28-2006 03:59 PM

What made you want to tell this story?

geeWiz15 09-28-2006 04:09 PM

man you have no morals. all you post about is raping girls and then going back in time, pirating stuff from the internet, and now shoplifting. are you posting from a prison cell right now?

this is a true story: the only time Ive ever shoplifted was in like 5th grade. it was at the magazine stand. that month, each Nintendo Power magazine was wrapped in plastic and had a pack of Pokemon cards withit. there were like 8 magazines. meaning 8 booster packs. and the stand was tucked in a weird corner so that nobody could see. so I took all 8 booster packs. I was nervous as *****. didn't get caught though. I remember getting home and gleefully opening all the booster packs and not getting one single worthwhile card in any of them. and Ive never stolen since.

thats a story Im gonna tell my kids. "so, son, shoplifting might seem like a good idea, but when you get home you're going to realize all you got was an Impostor Professor Oak and a guilty conscience."

saKf 09-28-2006 04:16 PM

I wanna be the very best, like no one ever was!
To catch them is my true test, to train them is my cause!
I will travel across the land, searching far and wide!
These Pokemon, will understand THE POWER THAT'S INSIDE!

Pokemon! (Gotta catch 'em a-all!) I know it's my destiny!
Oh, you're my best friend, in a world we must defeeeeeeend!...

One of my best friends growing up had a day care at his house. They watched Pokemon a lot, so I eventually learned the theme song from the cartoon.

JSub 09-28-2006 04:25 PM

Hey ALB,

I'd like to take this opportunity to say that you're one of the biggest f@ggots on this board.

hotsizzle 09-28-2006 04:27 PM


Originally Posted by JSub
Hey ALB,

I'd like to take this opportunity to say that you're one of the biggest f@ggots on this board.


The Mamba 09-28-2006 04:27 PM

I got caught, once. I took some shoelaces, and the securit manager was all "super-cop" and like wanted to report it. He did, and the managment team was probably like "a pair of shoe laces... haha, get out of here."

heavensdevil 09-28-2006 04:55 PM

YUP, when I was young, me and my boyz were all cleptos. I was just really good at it.

anyways, My boy got booked stealing a combination lock from Eddie Bauer, they took him in, called security, called his pops while I waited outside the store wit my pockets/pants/bags were filled wit stolen merchandise, I guess they couldnt search me cuz they didnt see me take anything.

heavensdevil 09-28-2006 04:59 PM

oh yeah, and a time where I actually got booked was during lunch. Me and like 6 other dudes( grade 5-6 at da time) went to the mall to juk **** from a dollar store(I know I know). but yeah, my next boy was so bait with it, dude was walking out holding his shirt, wit da outline of the temporary tattoos showing that he stole... but yeah, long story short, security dude takes all of us to the back of the store... couple dudes cried, said their real name. Not me tho, fukin pansies.

Hawker 09-28-2006 05:11 PM

bunch of hardasses in here

schyza 09-28-2006 05:16 PM

I can laugh about it now !!!
I was like 15 and skated down to the local K-FART to see if there were any good CDíS out (for all you younglings a CD was just after the cassette/tape and before the MP3 j/k) I was with my friend Scott and we were just checking things out. As I was leaving the store and was out the front door I heard this guy yell ďhey you 2 little punks get back hereĒ as I looked over my shoulder this guy who was like 6í0 came running up behind me. At the time I was all of 4í10 maybe 5í he grabbed my left shoulder then reached around in one motion and literally picked me up by my crotch and slammed me against the wall.

He started accusing us of steeling CDíS which we didnít. After harassing us in front of the store and realizing we had nothing he had the audacity to tell us never to come in the store again. Pissed off I did the exact opposite I went straight back into the store and to the customer service counter and asked to speak to the manager.

At that time the f-n door shaker had spotted me grabbed me by the back of the neck and took me to some back security office were he started threatening to call the cops I dared him to and told him that if he did I would make sure he was the one leaving in cuffs since he had no proof that I had stolen a dam thing and he had pretty much groped me like a catholic school priest. I once again dared him to call the cops then informed him that 2 of my uncles were LAPD he told me to leave the store and never come back.

Needless to say when I went home and told my popís the story he grabbed our friend Mr. Louisville and I and we drove back to the store but by the time we had gotten there the girl from customer service had already made a complaint to the manager on the way she saw him treat me and the manager sent him home while he investigated the matter. The next day my popís called to see what the repercussions were and he was notified that they fired the stupid security guard and I never saw the guy there again.

Hawker 09-28-2006 05:24 PM

ownage. good job man good way to handle that.

heavensdevil 09-28-2006 05:26 PM


bunch of hardasses in here

ud be surprised.

GoRapz 09-28-2006 05:50 PM

I never got caught shoplifting, only stupid people do.

Honestly, security everywhere sucks, last year i went to Futureshop, opened an MPIO mp3 with a USB cord, put it in my pocket and went out.

The Answer 09-28-2006 05:51 PM


Originally Posted by heavensdevil
ud be surprised.

what's that supposed to mean

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