Originally Posted by RidonKs
i dunno... if you're actually interested in a long term relationship and this girl meets your quota like you've said, i'd say f*ck the rest and go for it. only if you're relatively certain she doesn't have some personality trait that will eventually drive you nuts, though you can never be totally certain about something like that. if there's even a 20% chance she might turn into 'the one', well...
and in the case of a messy break-up, well, can you just overpower that shit and put yourself above the awkwardness? i just admitted to a girl/best friend of mine that i've been head over heels for her for about five years... this girl is so goddamn perfect and i wanted her so bad that over the past few months, i actually managed to read into the smallest details of our interactions -- a smile here, an invitation to a movie there, arm on the shoulder, stuff that had been going on since we f*cking met -- and convince myself she was completely in love with me. i was 100% on it and giddy as shit. then one fateful night i drop by her house for a quick visit and woooops!!! there she is with another guy, Dan or something. i managed to get out of there without making a total fool of myself (though walking down the stairs shellshocked, i slipped on the ice and fell on my ass), but it tore me apart. she noticed my reaction and apparently had been feeling bad for the past week, realizing i still thought we had a chance. then a few nights ago i finally got the opportunity to have 'the talk' with her where i explained what had been going on in my head for the past few months, and she told me concretely (though i sorta had to egg the words outta her), nope, i've never seen you as more than a friend, sorry... but i had long ago decided the friendship was worth getting over this bullshit because we get along so well and she's somebody i truly respect. now i feel like the ice, at least on my end, has been broken and i can carry on, find somebody new, stop obsessing about her 24/7. and the common point in our stories is that i also work with her twice a week... and that's something i'm just gonna have to face up to and not let it overwhelm my psyche. personally i think i'm up to the task.
point is, if shit does go sour, you don't reckon you'll be able to stay above the drama and behave like a civilized adult when you're around her anyway? it sure as shit ain't easy but some people are capable. and if it drives her crazy, well f*ck it that's great, she'll quit and it's sunshine and rainbows all over again.
maybe this is the absolute wrong thing you wanna hear at this point and i'm giving horrendous advice given that i have little experience in the matter apart from the story above. nevertheless, it's rare to meet a chick who has all of the features you described above and who you think you have a legitimate shot with... i say go klondike or bust.