11 Most Profound Quotes in Simpsons History

[RainierBeachPoet]

Homer: Hello my name is Mr. Burns I beleave you have a letter for me.
Mail Clerk: Alright Mr. Burns whats your first name.
Homer: I don't know.

Phone operator: "The fingers used to dial this number are too fat, please smash the keypad with your fist to obtain a dialing wand."

Ralph Wiggum: Me fail English?? Thats unpossible!!

[DirtBag]

don't know if it was posted but my favorite goes a little something like this

you see kids, you tried your best and you failed. trying is the first step to failing.

something to that effect.

[DirtBag]

on a sidenote, I loved the scene from the episode where milhouses mom starts to date the gladiator. Bart sneaks up behind homer while in the bathtub and hits him over the back with a chair.

nothing profound but 100% hillarious

[Lamar Doom]

http://tubearoo.com/articles/45730/T...They_Fall.html


i love the end

"where you going moe?"
"ahhh no wheres in partic-a-lar, i just need some time to think"




F*ck the SImpsons is incredible.

[rufuspaul]

I love Homer's bad advice to his kids." I can't lie to you Lisa, being popular is the most important thing in the whole world."

After Homer cooks all the bacon in the house in order to sell the grease for 68 cents: Bart: Dad, you spent $27 on the bacon. Homer: That doesn't count, your mother buys the bacon.

[1manfastbreak]

or when homer sings his smart song..

"I am so smart, I am so smart, S-M-R-T - DOH!" hahahha

[brantonli]

Homer: oh boy dinner time, the perfect break between work and drunk.

I have to admit, before 2008 I had only seen, about 3 or 4 simpsons episodes, and before 2007 I had never seen a Simpson's episode in my life, but now I'm hooked. I always see that people say seasons 4-10 are the best (or within that) Can anybody recommend any episodes after season 10?

[bigkingsfan]

After season 10, check out

11-5 E-I-E-I-(Annoyed Grunt)

Tomacco episode is hilarious, probably my top 5 ever.

[Brujesino]

Lionel Hutz: Well, he's kind of had it in for me ever since I accidentally ran over his dog. Actually, replace "accidentally" with "repeatedly," and replace "dog" with "son."

Homer: Are you saying you're never going to eat any animal again? What about bacon?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Ham?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Pork chops?
Lisa: Dad, those all come from the same animal.
Homer: Heh heh heh. Ooh, yeah, right, Lisa. A wonderful, magical animal.

Homer: Marge? Since I'm not talking to Lisa, would you please ask her to pass me the syrup?
Marge: Dear, please pass your father the syrup, Lisa.
Lisa: Bart, tell Dad I will only pass the syrup if it won't be used on any meat product.
Bart: You dunkin' your sausages in that syrup homeboy?
Homer: Marge, tell Bart I just want to drink a nice glass of syrup like I do every morning.
Marge: Tell him yourself, you're ignoring Lisa, not Bart.
Homer: Bart, thank your mother for pointing that out.
Marge: Homer, you're not not-talking to me and secondly I heard what you said.
Homer: Lisa, tell your mother to get off my case.
Bart: Uhhh, dad, Lisa's the one you're not talking to.
Homer: Bart, go to your room.

Homer: From now on, there are three ways to do things: the right way, the wrong way, and the Max Power way.
Bart: Isn't that just the wrong way?
Homer: Yeah, but faster!

Homer: Lisa, would you like a donut?
Lisa: No thanks. Do you have any fruit?
Homer: This has purple in it. Purple is a fruit.

[Lamar Doom]

the stuff with Skinner and Superintendent Chalmers in the 21 short films about springfield is transcendent.

[bballnoob]

the stuff with Skinner and Superintendent Chalmers in the 21 short films about springfield is transcendent.

Steamed Hams

[Boogaloo]

"but my mom says I'm cool"

[plowking]

Lenny: (hesitating) Uh, let's see. I'll have... one, uh...
Carl: Hey, hurry up. I wanna get my pretzel!
Lenny: One pretzel.
Marge: Thank you.
Carl: Uh, let's see, um... I will have one of your, uh...

[playtetris]

my favourite character.

Opposing Counsel: What is your opinion of him?
Marge: Hmmm... I'm sorry. My mother always said if you can't say anything nice don't say anything at all.
Homer: Will that hold up in court?
Hutz: No, I've tried it before.

Lisa: Mr. Hutz, why are you burning all of your personal papers?
Hutz: As of now, Lionel Hutz no longer exists. Say hello to Miguel Sanchez!

Judge: Mr. Hutz we've been in here for four hours. Do you have any evidence at all?
Hutz: Well, Your Honor. We've plenty of hearsay and conjecture. Those are kinds of evidence.

Hutz: And so, ladies and gentleman of the jury I rest my case.
Judge: Hmmm. Mr. Hutz, do you know that you're not wearing any pants?
Hutz: DAAAA!! I move for a bad court thingy.
Judge: You mean a mistrial?
Hutz: Right!! That's why you're the judge and I'm the law-talking guy.
Judge: You mean the lawyer?
Hutz: Right.

Hutz: Mrs Simpson, your sexual harassment case is just what I need to rebuild my shattered career! Care to join me in a belt of Scotch?
Marge: But it's 9:30 in the morning!
Hutz: Yeah but... I haven't slept in days. [glug, glug] Last chance! [glug, glug] Ohh yeah!

[Fallguy20]

Homer: Lisa, vampires are make believe, like elves and eskimos.

Willy: Nothing can out run a greased scotsmen!

Buck McCoy: Are you hungry Bart?
Bart: You bet!
Buck McCoy: *draws up rope and snags chips and soda from other room*
Bart: Wow, EVERYTHING tastes better lassoed!
Milhouse: Mr. McCoy, would you lasso me a bannana?
Buck McCoy: Now how the hell would I do that?!

Homer: Marge, get the celebration ham!
Marge: But all we have left is the hurricane disaster and flood ham left.
Homer: Marge... they're just hams...