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Thread: Approaching A girl you've never talked to Before

  1. #1
    Halkenburg Hui Guo Rou !@#$%Vectors!@#'s Avatar
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    Exclamation Approaching A girl you've never talked to Before

    I'll be the first to admit that I'm a very shy person. So shy that I curse it within my existence on a daily basis. Multiple times a day or in a week I get several opportunities to Interact with a girl. They're most times usually the one to initiate the conversation with me. Even If I find the girl attractive I just can't stay in the conversation and I inadvertent cut it short.

    One of my best friend is a girl. Even though I find her attractive I don't get nervous nor do i get overcome with the usual shyness. It's probably because she has no filter and fits in with all my friends seamlessly.

    So Theres This Girl I see in Campus. Usually in the school Grill. I find her attractive. I've backed down from talking to her because shes usually by her friends. But I made the resolve to talk to her the next time I see her regardless of whos she is with. So, today rolls around. After my first class I go to the library. When walking to my next class I see her walking to her class all alone. No phone in hand. No Friends. Just 2 feet away from me. I could have literally started a convo with her but I choked. I made eye contact a little before my long strides inevitably gaped her and she was out of sight.

    How do I fkn approach her out of the blue without looking foolish and how do I keep myself calm about talking to her even though I don't know her. The female friend gave me some lines to use but I choked and couldn't even introduce myself.

    Help Me Alphas and Ladies Men of ISH. This Young Student in the need of your aid.


  2. #2
    Curry fam navy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Approaching A girl you've never talked to Before

    Are you attractive?

  3. #3
    NBA Legend and Hall of Famer warriorfan's Avatar
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    Default Re: Approaching A girl you've never talked to Before

    you will almost always be nervous approaching a girl you dont know but you just have to do it anyways

    if you have a class with her it makes it easier, you both have something in common to talk about. when class is over talk to her and start it off asking about how she likes the class or the professor or whatever

    then if you are having a good conversation ask her if she is doing anything and if she would like to have a cup of coffee or something and then just take her to a coffee place on campus or near

    from there you should be well on your way

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    Halkenburg Hui Guo Rou !@#$%Vectors!@#'s Avatar
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    Default Re: Approaching A girl you've never talked to Before

    Quote Originally Posted by navy
    Are you attractive?
    I don't know. People who've seen my picture or in real life think im decent looking.

  5. #5
    Halkenburg Hui Guo Rou !@#$%Vectors!@#'s Avatar
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    Default Re: Approaching A girl you've never talked to Before

    Quote Originally Posted by warriorfan
    you will almost always be nervous approaching a girl you dont know but you just have to do it anyways

    if you have a class with her it makes it easier, you both have something in common to talk about. when class is over talk to her and start it off asking about how she likes the class or the professor or whatever

    then if you are having a good conversation ask her if she is doing anything and if she would like to have a cup of coffee or something and then just take her to a coffee place on campus or near

    from there you should be well on your way
    sadly no classes with her.

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    Dream Reality BasedTom's Avatar
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    Default Re: Approaching A girl you've never talked to Before

    when in doubt whip it out

  7. #7
    NBA Legend oh the horror's Avatar
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    Default Re: Approaching A girl you've never talked to Before

    Consider this: she's just as nervous and shy and potentially filled with some of the same doubts you are.

    Just say you've seen her around and wanted to say hello. Keep it short, good news is that being that you're both on campus you have that in common to speak about.


    It doesn't really have to be overly complicated. No real need to immediately ask for the digits but make yourself known to her. That way you can continuous say hello when you do see her

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    Curry fam navy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Approaching A girl you've never talked to Before

    Quote Originally Posted by !@#$%Vectors!@#
    I don't know. People who've seen my picture or in real life think im decent looking.
    What do your clothes look like?

    How attractive is she?

    Yes, this stuff matter.

  9. #9
    NBA Superstar 1987_Lakers's Avatar
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    Default Re: Approaching A girl you've never talked to Before

    I know what you mean, I hook up with alot of girls when I'm at a bar/clubs because we are all drinking and having a good time and because I'm a good looking guy I have little problem getting laid in that situation. I've also hooked up with some chicks I met online.

    But there is this girl who works at the gym I go to and she is absolutely stunning, 10/10. I see her sometimes checking me out and at times walks by me on purpose, but I just can't approach her and start a convo.

  10. #10
    Halkenburg Hui Guo Rou !@#$%Vectors!@#'s Avatar
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    Default Re: Approaching A girl you've never talked to Before

    Quote Originally Posted by navy
    What do your clothes look like?

    How attractive is she?

    Yes, this stuff matter.
    Beauty is in the eyes of the Beholder I suppose so i don't know how others would judge her.

    I tend to dress formally most times. I barley dress Casual unless it's after classes at night. So far she tends to dress in Sweatpants, Yogapants Sweatshirts and stuff.

  11. #11
    The People's Choice Draz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Approaching A girl you've never talked to Before

    Honestly. There's this girl in my class, it's my second semester being single. How I'd approach her, is, when we're both on break and I notice she's by herself, I'd confront her. I'll get straight to the point because I'm pretty straight forward, granted that you're approaching her it's a given that you're interested in her, might as well skip a few stages and get on with it.

    I'd say, excuse me, what's your name again?
    - answers
    I just wanted to let you know you're gorgeous (flatter her) and maybe if its possible we can get to know each other as friends (mentioning friends to show I'm not pushy nor trying to risk being turned down if she had a boyfriend)
    - if her answer is she has a bf, I'd say that's completely fine, I respect that (shows I'm not pushy or grimy) perhaps we can help each other study for quiz's or exam's, assignments (I'm sure she wouldn't mention she has a bf because I'm only asking to get to know her as a friend, unless she's a VERY faithful girl who blocks outsiders and overprotective over her relationship)
    if her answer is sure (given that I'm still unsure if she has a bf or not) I'd exchange numbers right there and then, to sooner or later find out through taking it to the phone, that one call, be buddy-buddy with her, show I'm more interested in getting to know her as a person and not seem objective based for wanting a relationship (because AFTER ALL, you ARE as equal to her if not BETTER, and you want whats best for yourself, don't make this all about her)

    That's just one thing I'd do. There's several other ways to approach a girl. Several other ways to play it cool, be smooth, etc.

  12. #12
    Curry fam navy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Approaching A girl you've never talked to Before

    Quote Originally Posted by !@#$%Vectors!@#
    Beauty is in the eyes of the Beholder I suppose so i don't know how others would judge her.

    I tend to dress formally most times. I barley dress Casual unless it's after classes at night. So far she tends to dress in Sweatpants, Yogapants Sweatshirts and stuff.
    Ask your friends.

    Man if your both just regular people go up and ask for her phone number. Let me tell you a secret. In this new social media age, girls do not say no to phone number request. Ive gotten crazy amount of numbers. Just do it. If it fails, you know you tried.

  13. #13
    Halkenburg Hui Guo Rou !@#$%Vectors!@#'s Avatar
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    Default Re: Approaching A girl you've never talked to Before

    Quote Originally Posted by Draz
    Honestly. There's this girl in my class, it's my second semester being single. How I'd approach her, is, when we're both on break and I notice she's by herself, I'd confront her. I'll get straight to the point because I'm pretty straight forward, granted that you're approaching her it's a given that you're interested in her, might as well skip a few stages and get on with it.

    I'd say, excuse me, what's your name again?
    - answers
    I just wanted to let you know you're gorgeous (flatter her) and maybe if its possible we can get to know each other as friends (mentioning friends to show I'm not pushy nor trying to risk being turned down if she had a boyfriend)
    - if her answer is she has a bf, I'd say that's completely fine, I respect that (shows I'm not pushy or grimy) perhaps we can help each other study for quiz's or exam's, assignments (I'm sure she wouldn't mention she has a bf because I'm only asking to get to know her as a friend, unless she's a VERY faithful girl who blocks outsiders and overprotective over her relationship)
    if her answer is sure (given that I'm still unsure if she has a bf or not) I'd exchange numbers right there and then, to sooner or later find out through taking it to the phone, that one call, be buddy-buddy with her, show I'm more interested in getting to know her as a person and not seem objective based for wanting a relationship (because AFTER ALL, you ARE as equal to her if not BETTER, and you want whats best for yourself, don't make this all about her)

    That's just one thing I'd do. There's several other ways to approach a girl. Several other ways to play it cool, be smooth, etc.

    If only I could be as smooth as a criminal as this. The Problem is how I can work up the guts to do it.

  14. #14
    Halkenburg Hui Guo Rou !@#$%Vectors!@#'s Avatar
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    Default Re: Approaching A girl you've never talked to Before

    Quote Originally Posted by navy
    Ask your friends.

    Man if your both just regular people go up and ask for her phone number. Let me tell you a secret. In this new social media age, girls do not say no to phone number request. Ive gotten crazy amount of numbers. Just do it. If it fails, you know you tried.

    I wouldn't call her regular. She's probably on the more known side. While I'm on the geeky side of things in terms of interests and stuff.

    I do know from a friend of hers that she has a thing for chocolate.

  15. #15
    The People's Choice Draz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Approaching A girl you've never talked to Before

    The entire point is being smooth. If you aren't smooth, you'll stutter, finding yourself speechless, forgetting what to say (which tbh isn't bad at all, because girls prefer natural, raw, unplanned approaches from men)

    Body language is everything as well. Don't stand there stick as a board. Smile, look at her in the eyes, gesture if you have too.

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