How To Handle Small Talk As An Introvert

[Vragrant]

Since I believe a lot of us on this forum fall into this category... but actually uses real conversations w/familiar celebs as examples.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kFsgTa17Xwo

[Prometheus]

50/50 ambivert fam checking in. Good advice in the video.

[kennethgriffen]

i hate small talk so much that i legit alienated myself from all my neighbours


i'm like larry david when he pulls through his golf club entrance.. i'd rather just wave and keep the window up. why do i have to have a meaningless conversation about weather or gas prices with some dumb **** i don't even really know


its pointless and a waste of time

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=utIeUZ3D2RU

[highwhey]

i hate small talk so much that i legit alienated myself from all my neighbours


i'm like larry david when he pulls through his golf club entrance.. i'd rather just wave and keep the window up. why do i have to have a meaningless conversation about weather or gas prices with some dumb **** i don't even really know


its pointless and a waste of time

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=utIeUZ3D2RU

i think your neighbors are understanding of your mental deficiencies

[fsvr54]

Small talk is ridiculous.

Hate it.

[Jasper]

To be social , you have to think it is the most important thing in the world , otherwise you may lose friends.

I have 4 step kids, all adults , and quit frankly they have an interior dialectic
that most people think is quit shallow.

They were raised never to show their emotions , and that came from their father as well as there mothers up bringing.

My family was quit the opposite , and showed our emotions more less on our sleeve.

To be social I act like they are the top people in the world , but they don't give a crap about me.... they'll never know I don't give a crap about them ..

[Draz]

Being introverted is a major flaw and setback when it comes to professional growth. Unless your skill requires no socializing you max out at how much people know of your talents. Think bigger. Managers, Directors, bosses in general tend to be social and are able to communicate to just about anyone.

I found being an extrovert has helped tremendously for my career.

[fsvr54]

Being introverted is a major flaw and setback when it comes to professional growth. Unless your skill requires no socializing you max out at how much people know of your talents. Think bigger. Managers, Directors, bosses in general tend to be social and are able to communicate to just about anyone.

I found being an extrovert has helped tremendously for my career.

The universe gives no phukks about "careers" and "professional growth" lmao.

Human concerns are so lowly.

P.S.

Sorry for being a dick

[AlternativeAcc.]

The universe gives no phukks about "careers" and "professional growth" lmao.

Human concerns are so lowly.

P.S.

Sorry for being a dick

[bladefd]

I am very introverted and have the same issue. I am terrible at smalltalk so I am not fun to be around. Couple of my friends and relatives have told me I am almost a different person through text messages than in person. Social aspect is an impediment in real life but that goes out the window over text so I feel comfortable being myself. It becomes frustrating at times when you want to say something to someone but you don't feel comfortable having a conversation so you end up not saying anything..

I especially get nervous around girls and become a mess.. Some girls more than others, especially girls who I find attractive. I have learned to ask them questions to get them to speak about themselves and I can weasel my way out. Girls looooove to talk about themselves so I have learned to ask questions about them and they will never stop talking. Makes my life easier. You just have to maintain constant eye contact and smile a lot so you still need confidence, which I didn't have in my teenage years but I do in my 20s. Anyways, the unfortunate part is those conversations don't last very long if you are not smalltalking and mostly asking questions.

Ultimately, it does suck to be an introvert. You can have all the confidence in the world and self esteem, but you still feel very uncomfortable conversing. You have so much to say and so many ideas in your mind, but nothing comes out verbally.. It is frustrating to me at times but I don't know how to overcome that discomfort/social awkwardness. What ends up happening is you stop talking to people and relying on long text message conversations, which most people don't prefer. Hell, just to give one example.. My cousin visits sometimes and we have only short conversations in person because I don't say much to her. I ask questions & make short gruff comments and our conversation ends. Then I sometimes text her and we have long text conversations with me doing most of the texting. In person, I say very little but over text, I can chat with her for hours because I feel more comfortable. Same goes with my convos with my friends and other relatives. .I can chat with them for hours about everything, anything but very little in person..

Public speaking makes me feel nervous and awkward.. I also feel drained after a verbal conversation but perfectly fine after a text message conversation.

[diamenz]

i'm awful with small talk. some chick will be chatting me up about yesterday's cubs game or the nice weather and i be like... "so u wanna ****"?

[JEFFERSON MONEY]

Few tips (mostly things Carnegie writes about and experience bi'idhnillah)

- Just being present and open
- Cultivating empathy... just recognizing their feelings.
- Learn how to handle anxiety.. recognize anxiety in yourself and just acknowledge it and move forward
- Keep your feet firmly placed on the ground and try to breathe deeper
- Ask genuinely interesting questions
- Listen attentively
- Try to find common ground, and just say I can relate to you on such and such and share stuff from your life---at the same time establish boundaries and don't be afraid to disagree
- Obviously most of you guys have a nice sense of humor so use that.
- As an introvert BECAUSE you are LESS VOCAL that has a STRONG CONNECTION with being more trustworthy. People need someone they can share/confide with.


Introverts have a rich inner world and valuable knowledge they can share if presented properly (IMHO)

[highwhey]

i'm awful with small talk. some chick will be chatting me up about yesterday's cubs game or the nice weather and i be like... "so u wanna ****"?

[JEFFERSON MONEY]

The universe gives no phukks about "careers" and "professional growth" lmao.

What exactly is the point that you are reaching at?


He obviously has a family, and human lives are valuable---and succeeding professionally is a means to providing for that family.

edit: Thanks for the apology. I hope you understand that these kind of statements, although they may be true in your particular perspective are discouraging, depressing, demoralizing and harmful to the human spirit.

Human concerns are so lowly.

I don't fully disagree with you on that. But what are some loftier goals for a human being to attain?

[tpols]

The universe gives no phukks about "careers" and "professional growth" lmao.

Human concerns are so lowly.

P.S.

Sorry for being a dick

being extroverted helps in basically all aspects of your life.