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Thread: The time I met a girl off the internet many years ago...

  1. #1
    Free the banned users. stalkerforlife's Avatar
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    Default The time I met a girl off the internet many years ago...

    She was beautiful.

    I'm obviously ugly and unsuccessful.

    Anyhow, I was so nervous and insecure that I put splashes of white paint on my face to try and hide my pockmarked face. I told her I had been painting all day and didn't have time for a shower.

    We were together for about four months.

    She had a nice house and a good job, so I shacked up with her and just played on the internet all day while she worked.

    I made her c um a lot, so it got me four months of free living.

    I guess she got tired of me not having money and dumped me.

  2. #2
    College superstar Shogon's Avatar
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    Default Re: The time I met a girl off the internet many years ago...

    Pics.

  3. #3
    Free the banned users. stalkerforlife's Avatar
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    Default Re: The time I met a girl off the internet many years ago...

    Quote Originally Posted by Shogon
    Pics.
    Another time I shacked up with a Mercer law student in Georgia.

    She's now a prosecutor.

    She's black, but talks super white and acts white.

    One time during an argument, I told her to stop acting ghetto; she flipped.

    It went something like "I've spent my entire life trying to shed black stereotypes! How dare you call me ghetto!"


  4. #4
    Free the banned users. stalkerforlife's Avatar
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    Default Re: The time I met a girl off the internet many years ago...

    Quote Originally Posted by Shogon
    Pics.
    Oh and I didn't have money for our first date, so we just went to Walmart and walked around. I was trying on silly hats and clothes to make her laugh.

    We got back to her house and she playfully took my keys and ran to her bedroom.

    I grabbed her by the neck and kissed her.

    She pulled back and stared at me.

    I grabbed her again and this time she didn't stop me.

  5. #5
    for your health Prometheus's Avatar
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    Default Re: The time I met a girl off the internet many years ago...





    I couldn't stand being at odds with you, stalker. GOAT ISH storyteller

  6. #6
    Free the banned users. stalkerforlife's Avatar
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    Default Re: The time I met a girl off the internet many years ago...

    Quote Originally Posted by Prometheus




    I couldn't stand being at odds with you, stalker. GOAT ISH storyteller
    And I swear on my kids it's all true.

    I have so many stories about how pathetic I am.

    Such as when I used to sign my own yearbooks pretending to be the popular pretty girls at school so that my friends and family thought I was cool.

    I even wrote myself a fake love letter to show to my friend to make him think I was cool and that a girl liked me.

  7. #7
    Wear a mask. highwhey's Avatar
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    Default Re: The time I met a girl off the internet many years ago...

    what about that time you stop receiving welfare and got a job instead?

    oh wait...

  8. #8
    College star Long Duck Dong's Avatar
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    Default Re: The time I met a girl off the internet many years ago...

    Quote Originally Posted by highwhey
    what about that time you stop receiving welfare and got a job instead?

    oh wait...
    He's a Mr. Mom. Househusband is a respectable position these days.

    So what's your excuse for being unemployed

  9. #9
    Wear a mask. highwhey's Avatar
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    Default Re: The time I met a girl off the internet many years ago...

    Quote Originally Posted by Long Duck Dong
    He's a Mr. Mom. Househusband is a respectable position these days.

    So what's your excuse for being unemployed
    thats not respectable at all. he

  10. #10
    Consensus, Cemented Vino24's Avatar
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    Default Re: The time I met a girl off the internet many years ago...

    You know it

  11. #11
    Free the banned users. stalkerforlife's Avatar
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    Default Re: The time I met a girl off the internet many years ago...

    Quote Originally Posted by Long Duck Dong
    He's a Mr. Mom. Househusband is a respectable position these days.

    So what's your excuse for being unemployed
    That I am.

    Volunteer at school regularly; they love me and praise me.

    Got kids playing sports; they all laughed last game because I ran into the field dancing after my daughter scored a goal.

    She got straight As last report card of the year.



    At the beautiful park right next to new house as we speak.


  12. #12
    for your health Prometheus's Avatar
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    Default Re: The time I met a girl off the internet many years ago...

    Quote Originally Posted by stalkerforlife
    She got straight As last report card of the year.


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