i dunno... if you're actually interested in a long term relationship and this girl meets your quota like you've said, i'd say f*ck the rest and go for it. only if you're relatively certain she doesn't have some personality trait that will eventually drive you nuts, though you can never be totally certain about something like that. if there's even a 20% chance she might turn into 'the one', well...
and in the case of a messy break-up, well, can you just overpower that shit and put yourself above the awkwardness? i just admitted to a girl/best friend of mine that i've been head over heels for her for about five years... this girl is so goddamn perfect and i wanted her so bad that over the past few months, i actually managed to read into the smallest details of our interactions -- a smile here, an invitation to a movie there, arm on the shoulder, stuff that had been going on since we f*cking met -- and convince myself she was completely in love with me. i was 100% on it and giddy as shit. then one fateful night i drop by her house for a quick visit and woooops!!! there she is with another guy, Dan or something. i managed to get out of there without making a total fool of myself (though walking down the stairs shellshocked, i slipped on the ice and fell on my ass), but it tore me apart. she noticed my reaction and apparently had been feeling bad for the past week, realizing i still thought we had a chance. then a few nights ago i finally got the opportunity to have 'the talk' with her where i explained what had been going on in my head for the past few months, and she told me concretely (though i sorta had to egg the words outta her), nope, i've never seen you as more than a friend, sorry... but i had long ago decided the friendship was worth getting over this bullshit because we get along so well and she's somebody i truly respect. now i feel like the ice, at least on my end, has been broken and i can carry on, find somebody new, stop obsessing about her 24/7. and the common point in our stories is that i also work with her twice a week... and that's something i'm just gonna have to face up to and not let it overwhelm my psyche. personally i think i'm up to the task.
point is, if shit does go sour, you don't reckon you'll be able to stay above the drama and behave like a civilized adult when you're around her anyway? it sure as shit ain't easy but some people are capable. and if it drives her crazy, well f*ck it that's great, she'll quit and it's sunshine and rainbows all over again.
maybe this is the absolute wrong thing you wanna hear at this point and i'm giving horrendous advice given that i have little experience in the matter apart from the story above. nevertheless, it's rare to meet a chick who has all of the features you described above and who you think you have a legitimate shot with... i say go klondike or bust.
You still friends with the girl?
Happened to me as well but I had a different ending. Actually going through it now. One girl I was really into a few years ago and got rejected by (we remained really close friends for years after) just told me she wanted to date. So getting out of the friend zone isn't impossible; just difficult as shit.
Man up, Carpe Diem, just do it. YOLO if you're into that shit, but if you are thinking this hard about it that you're posting on a message board you should probably just go and seal the deal now and be happy afterwards.
Unless you are directly threatened by company policy and that bothers you, don't. And if you are afraid of gossip or your reputation, probably don't either because she will tell some people.
Some women keep things to themselves, most don't. You be the judge.
For about eight months I wheeled the daughter of the guy who managed all of the stores in the region for that company. All three daughters worked there actually. I ****ed around with the middle one. She was 18 going into university when I first met her. I was a few years older. Not necessarily sketchy, but definitely not a girl I introduced to my friends. Kind of a nice feeling when her dad would come in and everyone in the department would shake his hands and I would think to myself "That hand has been places you don't wanna know about." lol
She was pretty good looking. Serbian. Model body (almost my height). Didn't **** with her the last six or so months I worked there and then didn't really talk to or see her again after I quit except for a couple times when I was working at a club. Nothing more than a head nod both ways. lol
Serbians have amazing high, but soft cheeks. I guess that goes for the other countries in that region too, but Serbians are awesome. Went through a streak of four or so around that time. For a couple of them, I didn't know they were part Serbian till after.
George: Ava was one of the reasons I used to like going to work. She was a
friend. Now we sleep together and suddenly, I don't know how to talk to her.
Every time I go to the bathroom I pass her desk. I have to plan little patterns.
I spend half my day writing! Then afterwards, I sit in my office and analyze
how it went. If it was a good conversation, I don't go to the bathroom for the
rest of the day. I see her laughing and talking with other people, they're all
so loose and relaxed, I think, 'that used to be me. I want to go back there
Jerry: What are you gonna do?
George: I have no choice, I'm quitting.
lol, such an appropriate post.
In the end it comes down to how much you value your job compared to how much you like the girl.
For the past month I've been crushing like some schoolboy bitch on this girl I work with. She's clearly into me, but I'm hesitant to make a move. We are both well-established at the company, and I'm worried that if it goes bad shit could be awkward as all hell.
Can this type of thing ever end well? I feel like she's the type I could settle down with. Please advise, ISH.
If she's cute and she can appreciate Georges Bataille you gotta go for it. Ask her what she thinks about 'The Story of the Eye'.
As someone that dipped into the company ink I will say this....
If you REALLY think this chic is relationship material get to know her extensively PRIOR to any sort of dating/talk about feelings/etc. When things go bad in these situations it happens quickly so you want to know ahead of time if her personality meshes with yours.
If this is just a notch on the belt situation I would advice against it. Women become possessive once you do the do.
I easily could have smashed this chick that I work with by now, but she is hella volatile and what not. one day she's down and totally not the next. anyway, we texted for about 5 months before I even found out she was attracted to me. Once she revealed she wanted to smash, we texted about nothing else for a 2-3 week stretch. she's very sexual and as it turns out, she wanted all along to do all kinds of sh!t to me.
It's hard to conjure a concrete judgment in regards to smashing her.
I like her and she's cool as hell. She smokes weed, loves watching and talking football and basketball, and to a small extent likes me, greatest of all. she's incredibly and almost even intimidatingly intelligent, and very well read.
There''s a few problems though.
We fall in and out of "like" almost weekly by way of frivolous bullsh!t, and as said before, she's hella volatile and also quite assholish, forever reminding me that she doesn't need me. she also has an ex-boyfriend who she's in love with, who is better than me for her in just about every aspect and facet.
anyway. she plans to quit and move in a month or so, and we will most likely cease communication. she leaves about 15 minutes away, and we've hung out maybe 5-7 times, smoking the ganj just about each time. i really don't know how to play it