i need advice, just found out the girl im sleeping with is pregnant.

[ace23]

I know. I don't deny it either. It's a horrible thing to do but I can't stand children and I can't see myself ever giving up 16-20 years taking care of another human being. Life is too short for that. That's why option A is always an abortion

What a selfish motherfuc[COLOR="Black"]ker.[/COLOR]

I feel the same way tbh. Wouldn't ever put myself in OP's position, though.

[Meticode]

Don't call me a coward, homie.

If that's the route you take, I see you as a coward.

[IcanzIIravor]

If that's the route you take, I see you as a coward.

Macho Man is going to give you a flying elbow from the top rope.

[InspiredLebowski]

How old're you?

You, the girl, and both sets of parents need to sit down and discuss it. Find out if she's open to carrying it to birth and if so talk to an adoption agency straight away. Make sure the agency discusses the "problems" that can arise when you carry a baby to term and have to give it away whether or not she was gung ho about the adoption in the first place. Adoption's obviously the best choice.

If worse comes to worst, endorse an abortion. But not just because it's convenient. You both made mistakes but there's no reason to punish the child for them. And that absolutely includes bringing it into a broken home to parents who don't want it and can't support it.

You don't "man up" and raise a child. That's complete ideological bullshit. You didn't twist your ankle playing ball and just need to walk it off.

[zizozain]

When is a fetus considered a person???
in islam i've read passages that it occurs 40-120 days and that abortion is permissible up to that point. What does the scientific community and other religions say on the matter and would it impact the abortion debate in a significant manner. I could imagine that even if it was proven that a fetus was not a person until later stages of development that there would still many people who still felt it is murder.

-Threat to the woman's life

-Rape

-Fetal deformity (Schools of Thought argue)

[bluechox2]

mtx abortion pill

[Brunch@Five]

Congratulations, your life is (probably) over. Then again, if all this is true, you have only yourself to blame.

so please explain how having a child means your life is over? That you can't go out every night/weekend?
Do you ever feel sorry for ending your parents life?

[MMM]

-Threat to the woman's life

-Rape

-Fetal deformity (Schools of Thought argue)

yea, unwanted pregnancies is not a valid reason.

[senelcoolidge]

Well if you both don't want a child and you aren't an evangelical Christian.....then the choice might be pretty easy.

yep, adoption.

[MavsSuperFan]

do this baby a favor and put it up for adaption, maybe i am being unfair to you, but it doesnt reflect well on your ability to be a father, that you come to ISH for advice on this type of issue.

[LJJ]

so please explain how having a child means your life is over? That you can't go out every night/weekend?
Do you ever feel sorry for ending your parents life?

While it's a hyperbole, I do feel the same as Q. In my head I'm still far removed from settling down anywhere. I don't want to pin myself down to one location, one career, one lifestyle. Too much to see, too much to do.

However, if I had a child I would feel responsible for raising and providing for the child. Which would exactly equate to settling down, getting into a career I don't really want to get into and providing a safe, stable environment. Then in addition to that, in this situation the mother is also just a person you have a casual sex relation with who you don't see as a partner and not someone you'd want to start a family with at any point, that certainly makes the situation worse. It wouldn't be the end of my life, but it would be pretty far from what I'd consider an ideal situation for me.

[Quizno]

this thread makes me feel so much better that i got dumped and haven't had sex in a few months

[code green]

Always the glimmer of hope that it's not yours. Hope it's the case, OP. You can check after the 10th week of pregnancy.

[LJJ]

It's very weird to me that people have a problem with abortion.

This is one of the rare times I'm being serious.

Elaborate on your personal opinion then.

I'm always curious to the opinions one people who are very much in favor of the right to abortion. Especially in regards to the boundaries they are comfortable with, ie "abortion up to X weeks is okay because ....., but after week X it becomes wrong because .....".

[kNicKz]

If neither of you want the kid put him/her up for adoption, I know a lot of adopted people that ended up having great lives, don't crush someone elses future for your own personal reasons