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Old 03-20-2009, 02:49 PM   #16
picc84
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Default Re: I don't even see the value in having a daughter anymore

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Originally Posted by JayGuevara
You will have similar trials and tribulations with a son. Not the exact same, but most of what you just expressed concern about would stand for a child of either gender.

Think of how starface's dad would feel if he saw his son's picture in the mirror with no shirt and only a pair of hoopin shorts on.

Your main concern of having a daughter is just the double standard of a girl being a slut and a man being Leon Phelps. Anything about safety, morals, friends in "the wrong crowd", or whatever else you threw in apply just the same to male children.

In conclusion, raising a child is not easy no matter what. Although I'm pretty sure that a single parent raising a child of the opposite gender is considerably harder than most other scenarios. My moms had a helluva time with me, and I can't even imagine what it would be like to try and raise a daughter by myself.

Thats the thing. I'll freely admit to having a double standard. But the thing is i'm not apologetic about it at all - you can't help the way you feel, and no matter how fair I could tell myself to be, the fact is i'll never feel the same way about my daughters sexuality as I would my son's, and thats that.

Also, I disagree with the assertion that most of what I described is applicable to a son. The worry of sexual predators, sleazy guys coercing and/or date-raping her, and things of that nature are not worries that i'd have with a boy. You could say i'd have to worry about him being one of those, but whether my son becomes a pervert is much more controllable than some random guy seeing my daughter and deciding he wants a piece of that. Thats a total outside factor.
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Old 03-20-2009, 02:49 PM   #17
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Default Re: I don't even see the value in having a daughter anymore

I have a young daughter and to be honest, I thought the same way you did before she came into the world about how it would be a lot easier to have a boy..and it probably is. But there is something so fufilling and unexplainable about having a girl. The bond is incredible. I worry about the future, but most of the time, its about day to day things like potty training, vocabulary, etc. I'm not thinking about myspace or any of that yet.
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Old 03-20-2009, 02:51 PM   #18
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Default Re: I don't even see the value in having a daughter anymore

Raise her to be a geek. The teen years will be without worries.
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Old 03-20-2009, 02:51 PM   #19
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Default Re: I don't even see the value in having a daughter anymore

I'm having a son in a few months. And I have to say, even the thought of him getting a girl pregnant while in High School,is just as bad as anything a girl can do.

I can only speak for myself, but for Karma's sake, I will do my best to teach my son to respect girls. I personally don't want to groom him as a player, because eventually I might have a daughter.

I've made a choice not to have any Maxims, or swimsuit edition magazines laying around the house, or even subscribe to adult channels. I don't think I'll take him to hooters or a strip club either. Not even for a bachelor party. I will do my best to teach him how to be responsible for his own actions, so if he gets a girl pregnant in the future, at least he'll have the means to earn a living.

As far as girls go, those girls with a strong, faithful father, they usually do really well.
It's those girls with absent dads, or girls that have dads who flirt at other women in front of them, or that openly go to strip clubs, hooters... those girls will give their dads a heart attack.
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Old 03-20-2009, 02:51 PM   #20
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Default Re: I don't even see the value in having a daughter anymore

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Originally Posted by Dasher
^Retrospective fallacy. The only difference in promiscuity then and now, is that if a girl became preggers either the father was forced to marry her, or she disappeared for awhile to live with her aunt, had the baby, and put it up for adoption.

So you're saying there's no inherent difference whatsoever between adolescent girls views and actions regarding sexuality in 2009 from girls half a century ago?

I'm gonna have to call bull****.

Last edited by picc84 : 03-20-2009 at 02:54 PM.
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Old 03-20-2009, 02:54 PM   #21
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Default Re: I don't even see the value in having a daughter anymore

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Originally Posted by PK3434
I have a young daughter and to be honest, I thought the same way you did before she came into the world about how it would be a lot easier to have a boy..and it probably is. But there is something so fufilling and unexplainable about having a girl. The bond is incredible. I worry about the future, but most of the time, its about day to day things like potty training, vocabulary, etc. I'm not thinking about myspace or any of that yet.

I'm not worried about the first decade or so. I'm sure having a little princess who's only interest is ponies and disney movies and hugging daddys leg when he comes home from work is great, and precious and all those things.

Hell, you seen that PC ad with the little asian girl messing around with pictures on her computer to send to her parents? Probably the cutest thing i've ever seen.

But then they grow up.
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Old 03-20-2009, 02:55 PM   #22
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Default Re: I don't even see the value in having a daughter anymore

Girls have been having premarital sex since marriage became the norm. There have been concerns about women's virtue forever. It looks different, but things are essentially the same. The arguments you are making now, were being made during the Jazz age.
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Old 03-20-2009, 02:57 PM   #23
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Default Re: I don't even see the value in having a daughter anymore

If the worst thing my daughter did was engage in premarital sex i'd consider myself lucky.
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Old 03-20-2009, 02:58 PM   #24
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Default Re: I don't even see the value in having a daughter anymore

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Originally Posted by picc84
I'm not worried about the first decade or so. I'm sure having a little princess who's only interest is ponies and disney movies and hugging daddys leg when he comes home from work is great, and precious and all those things.

But then they grow up.

Right. And I agree that it probably is harder with girls because of how easily influenced girls are (especially by piece of sh*t guys), but if they are well educated, prepared, and have a good upbringing, you have to live with the results once they make their own decisions. Thats just the way life is. kids aren't pets.
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Old 03-20-2009, 02:59 PM   #25
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Default Re: I don't even see the value in having a daughter anymore

Let's think about this also. It's implied that girls are easily taken advantage of, naive, and also now embrace slutty behavior and promiscuity.

How often do all of you get laid? If all these girls are as slutty or as naive as some folks make it seem, why isn't there a girl butt naked feeding me grapes right now?

How often do you go out, see a girl you wanna slay, and introduce yourself as Mr. **** the First Night and Don't Call Tomorrow? It's not exactly an epidemic.
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Old 03-20-2009, 03:07 PM   #26
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Default Re: I don't even see the value in having a daughter anymore

Quote:
Originally Posted by JayGuevara
Let's think about this also. It's implied that girls are easily taken advantage of, naive, and also now embrace slutty behavior and promiscuity.

How often do all of you get laid? If all these girls are as slutty or as naive as some folks make it seem, why isn't there a girl butt naked feeding me grapes right now?


I could tell some stories that really happened with friends or just guys i know growing up that would be just wrong, in terms of if the female were your daughter. I'm not going to tho, i'll just say a worst case scenario for females can get pretty bad, and what they will do for guys they are infatuated with when they are young can be pretty ridiculous.

Yeah having a homely, smart daughter that grows up perfect is probably very rewarding, but the alternative can be a nightmare i'd imagine.
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Old 03-20-2009, 03:09 PM   #27
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Default Re: I don't even see the value in having a daughter anymore

Quote:
Originally Posted by picc84
I am going to pray for a son with all my might and hope as hard as I can I get one.

If everyone thought the way you did we would all be homos. Sit there and think on that. If this silly paranoia and insecurity of having a daughter existed in every male? Nation full of homos. Would you prefer your son be gay? And also what are you saying about guys who dont think this way and want kids? Or guys who do have kids and they are girls? The Nelson laugh "Ha! Ha!"

Like whew i dodged a bullet. You guys? Enjoy your future myspace sluts. Because today? Females values and respect are low. So you're basically slamming the fathers AND mothers. Yanno the woman who bare the fathers seed that these two arent going to be able to raise a woman. They are screwed and meanwhile your son could be screwing thier daughter. But I'm sure you'll allow that. You'll put your lil disappointed act for good show. But your son having sex wouldnt be a big deal. Your daughter? Oh no, call the paramedics, i think you're having a heart attack!

Slap in the faces to fathers who have daughters.
Slap in the faces to the mothers/wives of these fathers.

Boy or girl will be influenced in life by various ways. You cant avoid it even IF you eliminated cell phones and the cyber world. Child predators still existed. Slutty ways still existed. Peer pressure still existed. THAT will never change.

Seriously think about how silly you sound. I admit I thought this way when i was a juvenile but grew up. Check this, the female that you plan to put a seed in? What do you think her past story is? Virgin Mary? hat about your sister if you have one? Or your mother & aunts? F*cking nuns right? You're sadly mistaken and naive to think there were time periods before the myspace, text messaging age went into full bloom everyone was innocent.

There are people who cant even bare/have children. You think they give a damn about your silly rant on not wanting a daughter? Praying hard for a son based on your silly remarks? Give me a break. Having a child is one of the most beautiful things in this world. You created another lifeform. That will exist on this planet having a piece of your makeup. So when they reproduce a piece of you will be present in thier kids, kids and so on. You cant buy that. Its priceless, just like the moment your LADY who is a FEMALE gives birth. You actually think it would be a bitter sweet feeling to hear the "Its a girl!" after your LADY who is a FEMALE pushes her out?

I'm not going to tell you to grow up. It'll happen and you'll look back on your thought process NOW as being rediculous and love that daughter even MORE.
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Old 03-20-2009, 03:10 PM   #28
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Default Re: I don't even see the value in having a daughter anymore

I can only tell you what I know from being a kid in Los Angeles in the 60's and in high school in the early-mid 70's. I also have a daughter graduating from college this year and a son that will turn 18 in a few days, both of whom I'm pretty close to.

This is another prime example of kids thinking they invented wild times.

If anything, I thinks kids were a little wilder back then. I know for a fact that I was wilder than either of my kids were at that age.

You kids ever hear of "free love" and all that stuff from back in the 60's? Orgies? Woodstock? Gang crap? I could tell stories of things that happened to me before I was even 10 years old, but y'all probably would just end up calling BS and it would turn into another ISH free for all.

The internet just makes news spread so far and wide that you hear about more extreme events, but kids are still kids just like they always have been.

Raise your kids well, pay attention to them, spend lots of time with them, talk honestly with them, be involved and they won't feel so much need to find what they need elsewhere.

Last edited by EllEffEll : 03-20-2009 at 03:12 PM.
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Old 03-20-2009, 03:10 PM   #29
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Default Re: I don't even see the value in having a daughter anymore

Quote:
Originally Posted by Smokee
I could tell some stories that really happened with friends or just guys i know growing up that would be just wrong, in terms of if the female were your daughter. I'm not going to tho, i'll just say a worst case scenario for females can get pretty bad, and what they will do for guys they are infatuated with when they are young can be pretty ridiculous.

Yeah having a homely, smart daughter that grows up perfect is probably very rewarding, but the alternative can be a nightmare i'd imagine.

I worked at a middle school, and girls were the aggressors. They were the ones hitting on guys. The school had a dress code, but they always tried to push the limits on cleavage and showing mid-section.

The guys were behind them on their sexual development. Most boys were still more interested in video games. Every now and then they'd be in awe of a hot substitute teacher.
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Old 03-20-2009, 03:12 PM   #30
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Default Re: I don't even see the value in having a daughter anymore

Quote:
Originally Posted by JayGuevara
Let's think about this also. It's implied that girls are easily taken advantage of, naive, and also now embrace slutty behavior and promiscuity.

How often do all of you get laid? If all these girls are as slutty or as naive as some folks make it seem, why isn't there a girl butt naked feeding me grapes right now?

Because she's doing it to someone else?

I reject the implication that because JayGuevara is not currently being serviced by a girl at this moment, it proves that females are not slutty and taken advantage of. I think that was a ridiculous argument, no offense.

Rest assured if you're not getting laid, somebody else is. Banging random guys being only one of many concerns I have about a potential future daughter.
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