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Old 01-27-2008, 09:49 PM   #1
SomeBunghole
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Default Jazz being hurt by lack of street hunger?

Using analizational techniques developed and honed by some of the brightest minds of ISH, I have finally arrived to an epochal discovery that explains why the Jazz are currently 9th in the West, when they have more talent but a few teams in the NBA. Contrary to popular beliefs, it's not the prepondrance of white players on the team, it's the lack of that elusive street hunger that every champion needs.

The problem, quite simply, is that not one player on the Jazz grew up poor. Having led pampered, affluent, lives, the Jazz players simply don't have the hunger(no pun intended) displayed by such ghetto superstars as Telfair, Alston, and the like. Let us take a minute to analyze this.

Carlos Boozer - Grew up in Juneau, Alaska, father in the army. Middle class.

Ronnie Brewer - Grew up in Fayetteville, Arkansas, father played 8 years in the NBA in the early 80s. Upper middle class.

Jarron Collins - Went to prep schools in LA then Stanford. Member of a mostly white, exclusive fraternity. Upper class.

Matt Harpring - Father and grandfather played college football, as did his uncle...at Notre Dame(!). Mother an accountant. Middle class.

AK47 - Grew up in communism, and there's no such thing as poverty there. Comrade class.

Deron Williams - Grew up in Colony, Texas, a planned community with a poverty rate of 1%. Middle class.

Mehmet Okur - His 2 grandfathers were an imam and an Olympic wrestlers. Working class.

Kyle Korver - Father a reverend. Middle class.

Ronnie Price - Born and raised in Friendswood, Texas. In 2007, CNN/Money Magazine rated Friendswood as one of "America's Best Places to Live. 'Nuff said.

As everyone can plainly see, the Jazz players are mostly in the NBA as an afterthought, as they would all have been lawyers, doctors, army officers, vodka tasters, and other such luminaries. Clearly, the street hunger is not there, so I invite all you fans of other teams to suggest some trade offers, sending your most underpriviledged players to the Jazz so that they might lead by their example.
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Old 01-27-2008, 09:55 PM   #2
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Default Re: Jazz being hurt by lack of street hunger?

so what you are saying is they are too smart to play in the nba?
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Old 01-27-2008, 09:58 PM   #3
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Default Re: Jazz being hurt by lack of street hunger?

It worked when Malone/Stock was there...
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Old 01-27-2008, 10:01 PM   #4
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Default Re: Jazz being hurt by lack of street hunger?

Why wasn't this a problem last year then? The Jazz are 9th (it's actually 8th at this exact moment) in the West because the talent is freaking crazy in the West right now. It's as simple as that. Only 5.5 games separate the top 10 teams in the West. There is still a lot of time for the Jazz to get back into the top teams...
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Old 01-27-2008, 10:01 PM   #5
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Default Re: Jazz being hurt by lack of street hunger?

Quote:
Originally Posted by SomeBunghole
AK47 - Grew up in communism, and there's no such thing as poverty there. Comrade class.

AK was born Feb 1981. Communism fell Dec 1991. After that, there was pretty extreme poverty there. But AK being a pro athlete from age 14 onward, I don't think he was hurting for rupels.
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Old 01-27-2008, 10:13 PM   #6
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Default Re: Jazz being hurt by lack of street hunger?

Quote:
Originally Posted by SomeBunghole
the Jazz players simply don't have the hunger(no pun intended) displayed by such ghetto superstars as Telfair, Alston, and the like.

Yes, excellent examples of the champion's mentality.
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Old 01-27-2008, 10:19 PM   #7
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Default Re: Jazz being hurt by lack of street hunger?

Quote:
Originally Posted by starface
Yes, excellent examples of the champion's mentality.
I know!! Before that I was reading and was like "Ok, I see where he's going with this" and then the examples he brings up are Telfair and Alston?? WTF?
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Old 01-27-2008, 10:21 PM   #8
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Default Re: Jazz being hurt by lack of street hunger?

He wasn't serious, come on now.
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Old 01-27-2008, 10:22 PM   #9
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Default Re: Jazz being hurt by lack of street hunger?

Brick........
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Old 01-27-2008, 10:32 PM   #10
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Default Re: Jazz being hurt by lack of street hunger?

What the F*CK is STREET HUNGER?!?!?!

Are you implying that if the Jazz played a lineup of 5 starving, homless men taken from the streets they would play better than the current lineup?
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Old 01-27-2008, 10:34 PM   #11
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Default Re: Jazz being hurt by lack of street hunger?

this is the dumbest thread i have ever seen.

OP, you are not allowed to talk anymore, throw your keyboard away.
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Old 01-27-2008, 10:49 PM   #12
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Default Re: Jazz being hurt by lack of street hunger?

I'd hate to be there when some of you have to take SATs. Reading comprehension as low as it gets.
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Old 01-27-2008, 10:52 PM   #13
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Default Re: Jazz being hurt by lack of street hunger?

Quote:
Originally Posted by SomeBunghole
I'd hate to be there when some of you have to take SATs. Reading comprehension as low as it gets.


you do realize that you wrote this statement right?
K47 - Grew up in communism, and there's no such thing as poverty there. Comrade class.

do you really expect anyone to take you seriously after that?
do you even know what communism is? read up on cuba some.
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Old 01-27-2008, 10:55 PM   #14
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Default Re: Jazz being hurt by lack of street hunger?

Quote:
Originally Posted by worldbefree
you do realize that you wrote this statement right?
K47 - Grew up in communism, and there's no such thing as poverty there. Comrade class.

do you really expect anyone to take you seriously after that?
do you even know what communism is? read up on cuba some.

Oh Lord, someone from Virginia is here to educate me about the world. I've lived in more countries than you've heard of. Plus, I capitalize sentences!

Moron.
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Old 01-27-2008, 10:56 PM   #15
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Default Re: Jazz being hurt by lack of street hunger?

Sorry OP next time write the word "Sarcasm" in red because some posters just don't get it.
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