View Single Post
Old 11-21-2012, 05:05 AM   #1
Legend of Josh
Deity ★ Persona
Legend of Josh's Avatar
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Alch|e|mist
Posts: 10,018
Default Minnesota Vikings

Right now, I'd say Minnesota should be *ranked* somewhere around the middle of the league two, going on three weeks passed the mid-season intermission.

This past week they laid in the cut watching the Bears get raped. Which is bad news, because they'll be in absolute rebound mode returning the favor to the Norsemen in their very next game. Oh, not to mention they'll play them again before season's end.

Noticed the Lions lose their second in a row after seemingly getting back into the mix of things, and to add injury to insult a mere four days later AP who's been gobbling up yards will have the luxury of stuffing his face with stuffing and gobbling up turkey while the motor city kittens face Houston.

It'll be cold in Green Bay, but the fudge-packers have been keeping warm, in fact they've been burning much asshole, on fire to be frank. The Vikings know this. They also know they play them not once, but twice. KY is your friend.

It isn't all bad news Skywalker! We're all sure you've stockpiled years worth of KY (the purpose explained in the following sentence), and that obviously isn't some your-team-is-getting-fucked-anally reference. We all know that jelly and your right hand is the closest thing you'll have to sexual stimulation. Yes, that's bad news, but what I was really getting at was maybe some good news! You will have an opportunity to get another win still (maybe, but surely isn't guaranteed) b/c STL is still on your remaining schedule.

Now for more bad news Sky Guy. Even if you somehow/someway had a female, you'd still need unlimited KY b/c no way in hell she's naturally getting damp downstairs with you being her mighty hero as she in her heart of hearts truly awaits a real knight in shining armor to slay her 'gina. No really, bad news being you still have Houston to play, and you can be rest-assured the Texans have already crossed the purple people eaters out and placed a W beside.

So let's do the math here. We'll be generous here and give you a victory over the Rams. That's 7 wins on the season, and yikes, 9 losses. 7-9 being the final product, and that isn't enough to get passed mediocrity. AP had a nice "run" there for a minute, but it wasn't enough. Here the whole time, you were arguing your Viks would be good enough to win enough games to snatch one of those wild-cards. Telling me to STFU and never engage in NFL discussion, or whatever you were spewing off at the mouth.

OK, alright, let's let you win more than just that STL match-up. Let's say you beat either the Bears or Packers on your home turf. That's 8-8. Sorry Spud Webb, still coming up short. You and I both know that's best case scenario. You'll obviously reply or make some comment about me discussing the NFL again followed by some emoticon shaking their head or facepalm, even though there's absolutely nothing you can dispute I've argued in this post.

Yeah, I know it sucks, after having such an impressive start to the season and Peterson having a career year to only have a huge brown dump being dropped on your orange hair freckled face and you retire from talking NFL until fall of 2013. You'll go back to discussing soccer or whatever other lame and boring posts/threads you find yourself engaging in, and no one will care or appreciate your involvement because you possess the personality of a tree stump.

Right now, like I said Viks are ranked somewhere in the middle of the pack, but after a couple of consecutive losses, then more, then maybe a lucky win in there against STL followed by additional losses, etc. - it's likely you'll find yourself ranked among the likes of the other 6-10 and 7-9 powerhouses, haha. Maybe even worse. Your team is no stranger to utter failure. Outside of Buffalo, the only franchise to make four SuperBowls and lose every last one of them. Not to mention, the last time you made a SuperBowl was... ?


# 7 Christian Ponder!!! [crowd goes wild!!!] ladies and gentlemen, your next SuperBowl bound quarterback!

I created a thread months ago making these same exact arguments and you didn't seem to be in agreement. I can't blame you for being a loyal fan, but I can blame you for not doing the right thing and just saying "you're right" ... instead of you being mean to me hurting my feelings by saying I don't know shit and to STFU.

In a few more weeks, then a few more, then by season's end I have this ironic feeling you'll be the one who S(s)TFU.

Go Viks!

"Hang in there son, our time will come!"

Last edited by Legend of Josh : 11-21-2012 at 05:20 AM.
Legend of Josh is offline   Reply With Quote