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Old 02-14-2013, 04:01 PM   #1
Mr. I'm So Rad
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Default Valentine's Day Mishap ***STORY INSIDE***

I remember the first Valentine I ever had was when I was 14. It was the first year of my life that girls I thought were attractive started acknowledging me. Well I was talking to this one chick and I asked her to be my Valentine. I expected her to say no and give me some bullshit excuse as to why but she actually said yes. I was strange considering that I got her number through really creepy means. I was on the school bus one morning and some of my friends just happened to be talking about her and saying her number out loud. I didn't have the courage to actually ask a female for her phone number so I just pulled out my T-Mobile flip phone and typed it in. So after my boner went down I decided to go all out simp mode and actually get her a gift. So being the creative genius I am, I settled on giving this girl a homemade gift from the heart. Because you know, that's what I thought guys who get girls do.

So I end up taking a plushie bear from my little sister (before you correctly call me a dick, she didn't want the bear anyway) that had glossy white fur and even sang a little kiddie gospel song. Now that I think of it, I don't know where my sister even got the bear from considering she wasn't into plushie shit. I think she stole it from our little cousin. So anyway, after I had the bear, I "acquired" a heart shaped pillow from my little sister and superglued it to the bear's outstretched paws to make it look like it was holding it. I guess to say some corny phrase like "I wuv you thiiiiiiisss much!" Yeah I was pretty pathetic back then. So the night before I'm laying in bed texting this broad and all the while I'm just sitting there chuckling to myself and talking to my brother (we shared a room at the time and he was the one who encouraged me to ask her to be my valentine in the first place) like this girl has no idea about the gift I have in store for her. This was before I had ever seen porn so at the time BET uncut was the most hardcore thing I had ever witnessed. I'm sitting there fantasizing about her hugging and kissing me because of the gift I made. I was really excited about the hugging because she had pretty big knockers for a 14 year old. So after talking my way into having her hug and kiss me the next day at school, I go to bed a happy boy.

The next day arrives and I'm styled up in my all red t-shirt/dickies combo like I'm from the streets of Compton. As I head out the door I grab a plastic Kroger bag and stow my ladykiller inside. On the bus, my sister tells me that my gift sucks and I should give the girl the necklace she was wearing instead. I ignored her advice (and would regret it later) and told her that she was just mad because no guy wanted her as a valentine. Fast forward and the whole school day goes by with nothing out of the ordinary happening. But now, it's that time. As I leave my last class and head for my locker, my heart is racing as a remember the fantasies I was having the night before. Sure enough, right as I get to my locker, she shows up with some tight ass jeans on and a low cut top. Cotdamn this girl had a rack on her. We exchanged gifts (she gave me a little generic Valentine's Day devil plushie and a few pieces of candy), she gave me a little hug that almost made my pants rip, and we parted ways.

So fast forward again and I'm getting off of the bus basking in my newfound glory. I'm talking to one of my friends at the time, who by the way, is probably the funniest guy I've ever met in my life, and he's gassing me up telling me I should just date her and stop flirting. I try to play like I'm a player and just shrug off his suggestion like I have too many hoes to settle down with one even though that couldn't have been further from the truth.

As I walk in the house I pull out my phone. I had been so distracted with my undeserved gloating that I didn't notice I had gotten a few text messages. I check them, and it turns out that she HATED my gift. She said that it was a cheap gift and I should feel ashamed because she spent real money on my gift. To top it all off, she said her mother said it smelled like weed and I should give the gift she gave to me back. I couldn't believe it. I mistakenly showed my brother the messages. His reaction was one you would expect a 16 year old brother to have at his 14 year old brother being in a situation like that one. In case you don't have a brother, he laughed his ass off at me and got everyone else on our street to laugh at me.

So I get to school the next day and she's acting like everything is normal. I'm the only n!gga sitting in the lunchroom with a plastic bag and a gift in it and she's acting like I don't look like a damn fool. But we re-exchanged gifts (no hug or candy this time) and went about our day as normal. And after that day, I've never had another valentine.
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Old 02-14-2013, 04:05 PM   #2
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Default Re: Valentine's Day Mishap ***STORY INSIDE***

Any hardcore sex or nudity in your story? If not, I'm not reading that novel
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Old 02-14-2013, 04:09 PM   #3
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Default Re: Valentine's Day Mishap ***STORY INSIDE***

Quote:
Originally Posted by jaydacris
Any hardcore sex or nudity in your story? If not, I'm not reading that novel


Yea, people need to learn to make their stories short & simple.
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Old 02-14-2013, 04:10 PM   #4
Mr. I'm So Rad
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Default Re: Valentine's Day Mishap ***STORY INSIDE***

It's an interesting story you ungrateful f*cks. Read it and you won't regret it
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Old 02-14-2013, 04:11 PM   #5
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Default Re: Valentine's Day Mishap ***STORY INSIDE***

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. I'm So Rad
It's an interesting story you ungrateful f*cks. Read it and you won't regret it

Come on man... ain't nobody reading that shit.



If something that long doesn't have the username Legend of Josh beside it, then ain't nobody reading it.
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Old 02-14-2013, 04:15 PM   #6
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Default Re: Valentine's Day Mishap ***STORY INSIDE***

I read it. No hardcore sex or nudity, and it definitelly wont make me a better person, but its OK written and honestly heartwarming.

I dont regret reading it.
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Old 02-14-2013, 04:18 PM   #7
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Default Re: Valentine's Day Mishap ***STORY INSIDE***

Quote:
Originally Posted by CeltsGarlic
I read it. No hardcore sex or nudity, and it definitelly wont make me a better person, but its OK written and honestly heartwarming.

I dont regret reading it.

You also read your mother's romance novels and along the way you look in both directions to make sure the coast is clear, then you slowly pull down your shorts then proceed to beat your meat every other paragraph or so, so why would anyone here want to take your advice in thinking it's a good read?

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Old 02-14-2013, 04:28 PM   #8
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Default Re: Valentine's Day Mishap ***STORY INSIDE***

Quote:
Originally Posted by Legend of Josh
You also read your mother's romance novels and along the way you look in both directions to make sure the coast is clear, then you slowly pull down your shorts then proceed to beat your meat every other paragraph or so, so why would anyone here want to take your advice in thinking it's a good read?


What? I just posted my opinion of the post I read. You dont seem to be a happy person..

Last edited by CeltsGarlic : 02-14-2013 at 04:32 PM.
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Old 02-14-2013, 04:30 PM   #9
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Default Re: Valentine's Day Mishap ***STORY INSIDE***

Quote:
Originally Posted by CeltsGarlic
What? I just posted my opinion of the post I read. You dont seem to be a happy person..

I was just being stupid man. Good response. You didn't do the whole ... thing.

Props.
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Old 02-14-2013, 05:08 PM   #10
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Default Re: Valentine's Day Mishap ***STORY INSIDE***

lol gay


jk I'm in tears
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Old 02-14-2013, 05:09 PM   #11
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Default Re: Valentine's Day Mishap ***STORY INSIDE***

In retrospect, did it really look that bad? She gave you a plushie too
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Old 02-14-2013, 05:40 PM   #12
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Default Re: Valentine's Day Mishap ***STORY INSIDE***

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Old 02-14-2013, 05:55 PM   #13
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Default Re: Valentine's Day Mishap ***STORY INSIDE***

Quote:
Originally Posted by Legend of Josh
I was just being stupid man. Good response. You didn't do the whole ... thing.

Props.


What are you some kind of online bouncer that has to G check people before they post in a thread?
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Old 02-14-2013, 06:13 PM   #14
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Default Re: Valentine's Day Mishap ***STORY INSIDE***

Quote:
Originally Posted by TheMarkMadsen
What are you some kind of online bouncer that has to G check people before they post in a thread?

Yeah, kinda sorta.
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Old 02-14-2013, 06:25 PM   #15
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Default Re: Valentine's Day Mishap ***STORY INSIDE***

Ehh... middle section dragged a bit but overall it's a decent read. 3/5 stars.
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